DEFINITION Sexuality refers to God’s anthropological design and pattern for the procreative relationship between male and female and to the experience of erotic desire within that design. Gender refers to biological differences in male and female embodiment and the different cultural ways in which the creational distinctions between male and female are manifested. SUMMARY Sexuality refers to God’s anthropological design and pattern for the procreative relationship between male and female and to the experience of erotic desire within that design. Gender refers to biological differences in male and female embodiment and the different cultural ways in which the creational distinctions between male and female are manifested. The creational narrative of  Genesis 1–2  provides the Christian with the foundational truths behind these distinctions:  God created humanity, male and female, in his image for one another.  To deny any part of this teaching is to subject God’s purposeful design to the desires of humanity. While much of modern culture desires to deny these distinctions and to untether gender from sexuality, the New Testament reaffirms the Old Testament’s teaching on this topic and brings the male-female distinction to its culmination in the Christ-Church relationship. A Christian framework for gender and sexuality begins with understanding that each find their origin, structure, and purpose within God’s will for creation. Gender and sexuality, from a Christian perspective, are enchanted realities imbued with divine meaning and purpose. But as the drama of Scripture unfolds, gender and sexuality become impacted by sin. Yet, in light of redemption, the original design and purpose of gender and sexuality are reaffirmed and heightened as the New Testament explains their ultimate  telos —to reflect the Christ-Church union. The assumption that gender and sexuality are ordered  by  God, and  for  God, stands in stark contrast to modernity’s view that divinizes gender and sexuality, understanding both to be ordered to, and determined by, consent and human will alone. Sexuality and Gender in God’s Design When speaking of sexuality and gender, what is meant by these terms? Sexuality  can have broad and narrow meanings. In a broad rendering, sexuality refers to God’s anthropological design and pattern for the procreative relationship between male and female. In a narrower scope, sexuality refers to the experience of erotic desire. Accordingly, in Scripture, sexuality is a constitutive part of human nature and human experience shaped by God’s will for creation; it is not the singular defining aspect of human identity itself. Gender  can also have broad and narrow connotations. More broadly, gender refers to biological differences in male and female embodiment. Narrowly speaking, gender refers to the creational distinctions between male and female manifested in culture (e.g., baby girls adorned in pink; baby boys adorned in blue). Gender should be understood as the cultural reality resulting from God making men and women biologically sexed and distinct. Christians need to understand that as partakers of God’s good creation, we are to acknowledge and participate in culturally-appropriate gender distinctions. This is because each culture discovers culturally-defined ways to reflect the biological and created difference of men and women. This means Christians should abide by the gender norms set by their culture insofar as what the culture dictates does not transgress God’s moral law for upholding the sex distinction between male and female ( Deut. 22:5 ;  1 Cor. 11:3–16 ). For example, cross-dressing is sinful because it violates the creational boundaries between male and female that come to be expressed in culturally-appropriate gender norms. We ought to care about the gender distinctions our culture holds up since gender distinctions are a common grace mechanism for acknowledging the innate differences of males from females. Sexuality and gender are first made known in the creational accounts of Scripture. In  Genesis 1:26–28 , we read of God creating man and woman in His image. Equal in their dignity, but different in their design and calling, the man and woman are then commissioned to “be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion.”  Genesis 1  communicates both the identity of male and female, and that this identity is oriented toward a procreative union meant to populate the earth. Seen through this light, gender and sexuality are substantive pillars in fulfilling what theologians refer to as the cultural mandate. In another rendering of humanity’s origins, we read in  Genesis 2  that it is not good for man to be alone; that a helper was needed. This helper is both similar and dissimilar; similar in her humanity, yet dissimilar in her design. The man and woman—as counterparts—are intended to form a complementary union. In 2:24, it is written that “Then a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” This language is at once both figurative and literal; figurative in that it describes the establishing of a distinct family unit; literal in that it testifies to the bodily union for which male and female anatomy are designed. This sexual pattern is the archetype for the Bible’s expectation for human sexual arrangements. Several axiomatic truths related to gender and sexuality are found in the  Genesis 1–2  narrative. God created . A Christian understanding for gender and sexuality begins with a foundational assumption about the universe itself. The Triune God is a God of order, not chaos, and random combination. Christians believe that the Triune God alone brings reality into existence. Reality and human experience are not self-creating or self-constituting. Christians confess that the God who creates the cosmos is the holy, sovereign, and just God who orders all aspects of reality—including sexuality and gender. Gender and sexuality are not evolutionary quirks; both find their origin in the creative will of God. God created humanity.  A Christian understanding for gender and sexuality also begins with a foundational assumption about human nature. God is the creator of humanity, and as such, has the right to speak authoritatively over our lives. We are his subjects, and sexuality and gender are constitutive aspects of God’s rule over humanity. We are not self-creating or self-constituting. Sexuality and gender, then, are not plastic and endlessly malleable to fit human preference. Rather like the body, Christians believe that gender and sexuality are purposefully ordered to fit God’s will for humanity ( 1 Cor. 6:13 ). This means obedience and a commitment to living in line with God’s creative will is where holiness and human flourishing form an intersection. God created humanity in His image.  Genesis speaks of God making man and woman in His image. Theologians debate all that being made in God’s image entails, but in general, we can say that we image God in our relational dimension, our structural design, and our functional capacity. While exercising caution to not reduce sexuality and gender as the defining marks of bearing God’s image, it is appropriate to assume that they contribute to the entirety of what it means to bear God’s image. Humanity existing in male and female iterations implies that our sexual design and gendered existence are participants in the fundamental nobility and dignity that human beings are said to possess because of being made in God’s image. To be made in God’s image means that no part of our humanity is purposeless or irrelevant to God’s creative intention. God created humanity male and female.  When God created humanity, He did not make us sexless monads. He made humanity in male and female forms. This means that gender, and gender identity—if such a construct is at all intelligible—is an embodied reality. Male and female self-conception are not constructed from psychology alone. Male and female, according to the biblical portrait, are fixed, bodily realities; meaning they are not interchangeable or eradicable. They are objectively known; such that the identity of who we are as sexed humans is not a mystery. Lastly, male and female imply substantive differentiation. This differentiation is observed down to the chromosomal, anatomical, reproductive, physiological, and emotive levels. This physical difference starkly manifests itself in the anatomical design of male and female, which makes procreation possible and the fulfillment of the cultural mandate actionable. God created male and female for one another.  God commands sexual activity to be experienced exclusively within the marital relationship of one man and one woman. The sexual distinction in Scripture bears witness to the sexual and procreative union that male and female bodies are capable of engaging in. In Scripture, sexual union ratifies the marriage covenant, signifying the existence of the marriage union intended to be permanent, monogamous, and exclusive ( Gen. 2:24 ;  1 Cor. 6:16 ). Notice in  Genesis 1:26–28  that the creation of man and woman in Genesis both is structural and dynamic. As male and female beings made in God’s image, their design is ordered toward a particular purpose—filling the earth, subduing it, exercising dominion. More specifically, that purpose is accomplished by male and female design—that the act of being fruitful and multiplying hinges on, and springs from, their respective sex distinction. In this account, general revelation parallels with special revelation. As each of us knows, sexual intercourse is capable of producing children, and this reality is exclusive to only one reality, male-female complementarity. The Bible and Creation’s Manifold Witness of Gender and Sexuality At least in contemporary debates on these issues, Christians are often tempted to treat our vision for sexuality and gender as ethical matters relevant and pertaining to Christians only. This is not a biblical way to approach such subjects. Such a view is a truncated account for explaining why Christians’s convictions on such matters are not only Christian, but universally applicable. The Bible casts a vision for sexuality and gender that is true on both special and general revelation grounds. As biblical scholar Richard Bauckham writes, “biblical commands are not arbitrary decrees but correspond to the way the world is and will be” (see  God and the Crisis of Freedom: Biblical and Contemporary Perspectives , 70). When Christians discuss gender and sexuality, they must understand that the design for gender and sexuality in Scripture is the design that all humans are obligated to live within, even if they do not appear most the natural or easiest in light of sin. What Christians believe about sexuality and gender is not an “in-house” argument for debate among Christians only. The Bible understands gender and sexuality as creational realities that determine whether a society will organize itself in subjection to God’s authority or in rejection to God’s authority. As ethicist Bernd Wannenwetsch writes, “The Christian doctrine of creation is precisely such a way of explaining why there are aspects of reality that are invested with normative moral significance” (see “Creation and Ethics: On the Legitimacy and Limitation of Appeals to ‘Nature’ in Christian Moral Reasoning,” in  Within the Love of God: Essays on the Doctrine of God in Honour of Paul S. Fiddes , 209). This means that the Bible’s teaching on gender and sexuality are not sectarian. These teachings are not built on fideistic decrees or fiat. Instead, the Bible speaks to created reality in both a sinful and redeemed state—because the Lord Jesus reigns over creation and unites both creation and redemption in His gospel (see see Oliver O’Donovan,  Resurrection and Moral Order: An Outline for Evangelical Ethics ) .  Gender and sexuality do not require an exclusively Christian epistemology for their authority or intelligibility, but insofar as sin warps human perception, the Bible’s teaching do require explanation in line with the full drama of Christian doctrine. A vision for gender and sexuality that fails to satisfy the demands set forth in Genesis will be subject to endless redefinition, which is why revisionist accounts of gender and sexuality—such as same-sex marriage and gender fluidity—retain no coherent limiting principle. Sexuality and Gender in Revolt The five axioms above are the backdrop that explain Scripture’s prohibition on sexual practices and gender displays that transgress God-ordained creational distinctions and creational boundaries. Sin’s impact demonstrates how each of the axioms are assaulted. Concerning axiom one, a culture of unbelief either rejects God’s existence or God’s authority. Man’s agency, in this paradigm, is the measure of all that is. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the never-ending redefinition of sexual morality and ensuing gender confusion. Since there are no binding rules, sexuality and gender are a matter of personal will and preference. Sexuality and gender are self-chosen, issuing from the autonomous self. Since humanity is not bound by a code of objective and universal morality, what Christians consider sexually immoral or out of step with God’s intent for gender expression, is shorn of all taboo and prohibition— whether pornography ( Ps. 101:3 ;  Matt. 5:28 ;  Col. 3:5 ) , bestiality ( Lev. 18:23, 20:15–16 ;  Exod. 22:19 ), polygamy ( Gen. 2:24 ), lust ( Matt. 5:28 ;  Mark 7:20–23 ) , adultery ( 1 Cor. 6:9–11 ), orgies ( Gal. 5:19–21 ), non-monogamy ( Matt. 19:1–10 ), rape ( Deut. 22:23–29 ;  Ezek. 45:9 ;  Mark 12:31 ), pedophilia ( Matt. 18:5–6 ), homosexuality ( Rom. 1:26–27 ;  1 Cor. 6:9–11 ), fornication ( Gen. 2:24 ;  Deut. 22:28–29 ;  Eph. 5:3 ;  1 Thess. 4:1–8 ), incest ( Lev 18:8–18 ;  1 Cor. 5:1–5 ), prostitution ( Hos. 4:14 ) cross-dressing ( Deut. 22:5 ;  1 Cor. 11:3–16 ), effeminacy ( 1 Cor 6:9–10 ), androgyny ( Gen 1:27–28 ;), illicit seduction ( Gen. 34 ;  Prov. 7:6–23 ), transgenderism ( Gen. 1:27–28 ), and sexual abuse ( Deut. 22:25–27 ;  Mark 12:31 ). In axiom two, humanity denies that it is a divine creation born of an intelligent and divine will, or inscribed with any inherent, fixed meaning. Any sexual arrangement is thus allowable insofar as consent is present; and any gender expression is permissible insofar as it comports with a person’s self-perception. Since humanity may or may not be the creation of a divine being, saying that a particular sexual arrangement or gender expression is prohibited is simply a product of social convention. With axiom three, humanity divests itself of any particular calling in light of being made in God’s image. Since we are not special creations endowed with a mission to exercise dominion, we subsist by vain expressions of human autonomy and self-seeking justification. Our liberation from God’s constraints becomes our abolition. In axiom four, humanity denies that male and female are objective and fixed realities. Instead, gender fluidity and suppression of sexed realities paint a portrait of gender and sexuality that is endlessly malleable and psychologically grounded. This allows such sins as transgenderism. In axiom five, the beauty of male-female complementarity is denied, meaning that the creational guardrails for sexuality are nullified. This licenses such sexual sins as homosexuality. It is not that homosexuality is worse than all other sins; but that it narrates through vivid and graphic portrayal an expulsive rejection of God’s authority concerning creational design and boundaries. In all five axioms, what is at the root of humanity’s assault on God-defined expressions of sexuality and gender? God’s authority over sexual desire and sexual relationships, and God’s design for how gender is conceived and expressed, is cast off. As it is with every issue of ethics and morality, the idea that any objective standard exists and is binding begins and ends with whether God exists and whether He intends to hold individuals accountable for their actions. Sexuality and Gender in Redemption While this essay has strived to present an argument for the Bible’s teaching on gender and sexuality that is true on both general and revelation grounds, it would be incomplete if it failed to examine how sexuality and gender are understood within the horizon of the gospel. The New Testament reaffirms the vision for gender and sexuality taught in Genesis.  The gospel offers the promise of the Holy Spirit’s guidance to live lives of holiness; the gospel does not create a radically new or disjunctive expectation for sexual morality and appropriate gender expression. In  Matthew 19 , Jesus affirms that the creational pattern for male and female set forth in  Genesis 1–2  remains authoritative and binding for humanity. In  Acts 15 , the earliest church leaders confirmed that obedience to Old Testament law was not expected for Gentle Christians, but Christians were expected to uphold the same standard of Old Testament sexual morality inaugurated at creation. The pattern for sexual relationship and gender expression laid out for the early Christians thus validates the pattern begun in Genesis. Furthermore, New Testament prohibitions on sexual practices (e.g., homosexuality, incest) are echoes of the Old Testament’s sexual ethic. This ethic is grounded in God’s moral law and cannot be discarded or excused as pertaining only to Israel. The New Testament makes clear that sexual rebellion and rejection of appropriate gender boundaries renders culpable before God’s judgement ( 1 Cor. 6:9–11 ). The gospel brings fulfilling clarity to the vision for gender and sexuality taught in Genesis.  The storyline and arc of the Bible’s teaching on gender and sexuality is one that relies upon narrative climax. In  Ephesians 5:22–23 , Paul explains that the union of husband and wife is meant to foreshadow the most visceral union in the cosmos—the Christ-Church union. Nowhere is the explanation of the Christ-Church union meant to overwhelm, supplant, or eradicate the underlying validity of male-female complementarity set forth in Genesis. The story of the gospel’s relationship to created nature—which includes our sexuality and gender—is that created nature would be led in the direction it was always intended (see Wannenwetsch, “Creation and Ethics,” 210). Though sexuality and gender remain creationally intelligible despite the fall, as Christians, we believe that both are ultimately designed to reflect the union of Christ and the church. The gospel empowers Christians to live in accord with the biblical vision for gender and sexuality taught in Genesis.  The gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ calls us to glorify God with our bodies because they were purchased by Him ( 1 Cor. 6:20 ). This purchase comprises the whole man ( 2 Cor. 5:17 ). We are called to honor the Lord Jesus and to submit to Him our sexual desires as well as our conduct ( Matt. 5:28 ;  Gal. 5:19–21 ;  Eph. 4:22–24 ;  Col. 3:5 ;  1 Thess. 4:1–8 ). We are to flee all forms of sexual morality ( 1 Cor. 6:18 ;  Eph. 5:3–5 ;  1 Thess. 4:1–8 ). We embrace appropriate gender norms so as not to scandalize or give offense with impropriety of gender expression ( Deut. 22:5 ;  1 Cor. 6:9; 11:3–16 ;  1 Tim. 2:9 ). Christians believe that we are not our own, and that we owe every facet of our existence—our gender expression and our sexuality—to Jesus Christ ( Col. 1:15–20 ). FURTHER READING Andreas Köstenberger,  God, Marriage, and Family: Rebuilding the Biblical Foundation Andrew T. Walker,  God and the Transgender Debate . See this  author interview . Andrew T. Walker and Eric Teetsel,  Marriage Is: How Marriage Transforms Society and Cultivates Human Flourishing Andrew T. Walker, “ On Creation, Revelation, and the Meaning of Male and Female ” Christopher C. Roberts,  Creation & Covenant: The Significance of Sexual Difference in the Moral Theology of Marriage Daniel Heimbach,  True Sexual Morality: Recovering Biblical Standards for a Culture in Crisis Dennis Hollinger,  The Meaning of Sex: Christian Ethics and the Moral Life Denny Burk,  What is the Meaning of Sex? John Piper and Wayne Grudem,  Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood: A Response to Evangelical Feminism Ryan T. Anderson,  When Harry Became Sally: Responding to the Transgender Moment Sherif Girgis, Ryan T. Anderson, and Robert P. George,  What is Marriage? Man and Woman: A Defense Stanley Grenz,  Sexual Ethics: An Evangelical Perspective The Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood ,  The Nashville Statement , Todd Wilson,  Mere Sexuality: Rediscovering the Christian Vision of Sexuality This essay is part of the Concise Theology series. All views expressed in this essay are those of the author. This essay is freely available under Creative Commons License with Attribution-ShareAlike, allowing users to share it in other mediums/formats and adapt/translate the content as long as an attribution link, indication of changes, and the same Creative Commons License applies to that material. If you are interested in translating our content or are interested in joining our community of translators,  please reach out to us . This work is licensed under  CC BY-SA 4.0

The unseen war behind all wars is won as the sower of deceit is thrown from heaven. A desperate and defeated Enemy turns his attention to the people of God. www.thevillagechurch.net .

PRIORITIZING STEWARDSHIP “Honor the LORD with your wealth, with the firstfruits of all your crops; then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and your vats will brim over with new wine.” Proverbs 3:9-10 NIV King Solomon’s book of Proverbs provides the reader with practical advice for abundant living. In this passage, we have to understand the practice of the early Hebrews. They were required in the Old Testament Torah to give to the priests the first part of the olive oil, wine, and grain that they produced every year. The assurance in the second part of the Proverbs passage was that God would bless those who faithfully brought tithes and offerings to God with abundance so great that they would not have room to store it all. “Firstfruits” is the consistent practice of giving God the first and best. The Hebrew word re’shyith is translated “firstfruits” It literally means, “the first in place, time, order or rank.” As our Creator and Provider, God wants us to give Him the first of all we garner. The overflowing abundance promised inthe second part of the passage comes from the root word “male’,” or sometimes spelled “mala’.” Mala, or overflowing, simply means more than can be kept. Mathew Henry, in his commentary on the book of Proverbs, discusses the importance of honoring God. He speaks the honor as being so complete, that we give back to Him the first of whatever he gives us. He says that we should honor God with our bodies, our spirit and our estates, (all of our worldly possessions). In doing so, we will live on annual yield and thus maintain a clear dependence upon God. Without such faith-building dependence, we drift and become proud and self-reliant like the non-believers of the world who trust their own intellect and resources to survive. Solomon’s instructions are clear- we give God the first, live on what we need, and give the rest to the needy. If we do so we will have overflowing barns and a cellar full of wine. In today’s world, our bank accounts would have more money in them than we need, and our mortgages would be paid off. FIRSTFRUITS IN GENESIS The concept of firstfruits began in the book of Genesis with Cain and Abel. In Genesis 4:2-7, Moses writes: Now Abel kept flocks, and Cain worked the soil. In the course of time Cain brought some of the fruits of the soil as an offering to the LORD. But Abel brought fat portions from some of the firstborn of his flock. The LORD looked with favor on Abel and his offering, but on Cain and his offering he did not look with favor. So Cain was very angry, and his face was downcast. Then the LORD said to Cain, "Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must master it." NIV At the dawn of history, God asked for the firstfruits of all a man owned. Specifically, God asked for a blood sacrifice-the same sacrifice God made when He slaughtered animals to cover Adam and Eve’s nakedness (Genesis 3:21). Although Genesis 4 does not specifically say that Cain and Abel knew God’s plan concerning firstfruits, it is obvious that they were cognizant of God’s requirement. Otherwise, God would not have asked Cain “...If you do what is right, will you not be accepted?” From this simple question we can deduce that Cain understood God’s plan. But in Genesis 14:18-24, Abraham had rescued his nephew Lot from his enemies, the neighboring kings. Following Abraham’s victory, a mystical priest named Melchizedek met him as he returned from battle. We learn that he was not only a priest but a king. Abraham, when faced with this “king of righteousness” and “king of Salem” (king of peace), immediately gave him a tenth of everything. (Hebrews 7:1-22) The writer to the Hebrews informs us that Melchizedek was without mother or father, and was eternal. Hebrews 7:3 calls him a “priest forever.” Such a holy, supernatural appearance of this kingly priest compelled Abraham to give his tithe. The author of Hebrews further teaches that Christ was a priest after the order of Melchizedek. As believers in Christ, Abraham’s gift to this “priest-king” is a perfect example of how we should offer to God a “firstfruits” gift of all that we possess. We do not give begrudgingly, or even out of subservience or fear. We give to Jesus because we are overwhelmed with His greatness, purity, and generosity. Nothing is more natural to pour out all that we have in His presence. The writer to the Hebrews states in Hebrews 7:15-22: “And what we have said is even more clear if another priest like Melchizedek appears, one who has become a priest not on the basis of a regulation as to his ancestry but on the basis of the power of an indestructible life. For it is declared: "You are a priest forever, in the order of Melchizedek ." Because of this oath, Jesus has become the guarantee of a better covenant.” NIV • Do you tithe, give part of what God has given to you back to His works? How have you communicated that to your children, the people you mentor, your grandchildren? • How does a generous heart transform your life? How will it affect your worship? Your relationships? Your attitudes? STEWARDSHIP AND SPIRITUALITY Stewardship is a spiritual issue. The connection between giving to God and loving Him is clearly taught in Malachi, the last of the prophetic writings in the Old Testament. Malachi 1:6 indicates that the sacrifices we offer to God demonstrate our respect for Him as our Heavenly Father: “A son honors his father, and a servant his master. If I am a father, where is the honor due me? If I am a master, where is the respect due me?” NIV Offering our best resources to God is a reflection of our relationship with Him. We worship, honor and revere Him because He is our Heavenly Father. The connection of devotion between parent and child would naturally produce an attitude of gratefulness from the child for his parent- reciprocity is a natural response. No sacrifice is too great to make for someone you love. Our gifts to God should be an instinctive outgrowth of our intimacy with Him. Malachi paints a second portrait of stewardship in Malachi 1:6. The prophet depicts a master who deserves complete obedience and devotion from his servant. Giving our best to the God of the universe is not simply a request from God-it is a command. The holy, all-powerful, eternal Creator of the universe should be recognized and worshipped with our best gifts for Him. The writer further teaches us that failing to give God His rightful due is a spiritual issue. In Malachi 3:16, he teaches that man perpetually disobeys God’s commands. The previous verse lists those wicked men and women who face God’s wrath: sorcerers, liars, adulterers, dishonest employers, cruel oppressors, and God-rejecters. Those who practice such sinful behaviors would certainly incur God’s judgment. However, the verse that follows seems almost enigmatic: the road to repentance is paved by giving God our best--our tithes and offerings. (v. 7b) Malachi concurred with Solomon’s teaching on firstfruits in Proverbs chapter 3. Solomon taught that the result of giving God our firstfruits is full grain silos and overflowing wine vats. Malachi pens that God’s promises for good stewards are even more far-reaching than Solomon’s discussion. When men repent and give God the worship, the firstfruits that are His due, God will respond by: 1. Opening the windows of heaven and pouring out uncontainable blessings. (v.10) 2. Protection over our resources (crops) from pests and destructive elements. (v. 11) 3. Giving us a powerful testimony of God’s favor on our lives to an unbelieving world. (v. 12a) 4. Happiness in our daily lives. (a delightful land). (v. 12b) 5. Heavenly recognition (a scroll of remembrance) for our obedience. (v. 16) 6. Intimacy with God (they shall be mine…my treasured possession). (v. 17) 7. A covering of protection over our very lives (as a man who spares his son who serves Him). (v. 17b) 8. Remarkable character distinguishing us from all others. (v. 18) 9. Salvation from God’s wrath at the Day of the Lord. (4:1) 10. Healing and deliverance given by Jesus “the sun of righteousness with healing in His wings.” (v. 2) 11. Authority over Satan and wicked men. (v.3) 12. God’s prophetic words spoken into our lives (conviction of the Holy Spirit to keep us pure). (v. 5) 13. Restoration of family relationships. (v. 6) • How can your view of God determine your response to Him with regards to stewardship? Read Matthew 25:24. In the parable of the talents, what make the one-talent man hold onto his talent instead of investing it? How did He see God? What is your view of God? • Has there been a time in your life when you gave God the top portion of your income even when you were afraid you couldn’t afford it? Did you regret giving your best to God? • Do you feel like your relationship to God is as close as you want it to be? Have you ever considered that stewardship could affect your intimacy with your Heavenly Father? Why or why not? • Write a thank you letter to God for all the material blessings in your life. One Man’s Testimony I really loved this study. God so boldly brought me to my knees. I was living as a hypocrite, hedging my bet that “doing religion” would get me into eternal life, while not totally giving God what he wanted. He stripped me of my pride and in that process caused me to gain everything. Every aspect of my life is now richer, walking closer with God’s Holy Spirit. Life was dull and routine prior to giving God my heart, now the pain is deep, but the gain is deeper. Beauty is now seen, sounds are glorious, I love so much more deeply. Do not hesitate to place your heart into the hands of the One who made it. He made that heart so that you could love Him, just as He loves you. For Further Study: Write Your Own Observations Genesis 3:21 Genesis 4:2-7 Genesis 14:18-24 Genesis 28:22 Numbers 18:21-24 Deuteronomy 26:12-15 Malachi 1:6 Malachi 3:10-4:6

Recently, someone asked me if I was familiar with John 14:12 where Jesus says, “Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever believes in me will also do the works that I do; and greater works than these will he do.” The implication of the question was that when Jesus said this, couldn’t it apply to teleportation? This question actually brings up other passages where Jesus seems to tell us that Christians will do remarkable things if they have enough faith to believe—things like moving mountains (Matthew 17:20), withering trees (Matthew 21:18-22), make trees fly (Luke 17:6), walking on water (Matthew 14:22-33), or even controlling the weather (James 5:17), all by faith. There is only one problem with this line of reasoning. In the nearly 2,000 years since Jesus walked the earth, no one has ever moved a mountain, instantly withered a tree, made a tree fly, or walked on water. So, what is going on here? If we are Christians and believe in Jesus, the cross, and the resurrection, why can’t we do these things? Is this a matter of, as some would say, faulty faith? I don’t think so, and I’d like to tell you why. The first thing we must do is get a proper understanding of what Jesus meant when he said that we would do, “Greater works” than he did. Then we must look carefully at Jesus’ statements about moving mountains and withering trees (and so on) and see if there is another legitimate meaning. Then we must examine faith. What did Jesus mean when he referred to the “mustard seed” of faith (Luke 17:6). Does faith come in greater or lesser volumes, sizes, or weights, or is something else going on? As I examine these issues with you I’d like you to consider an important truth about scripture. Jesus didn’t always mean what he said. I’m not saying that Jesus didn’t believe what he said, or that he lied about what he said. Rather, Jesus sometimes employed verbal (or literary) devices to help him make his points. When he did this he did not intend for his hearers to take him literally on certain subjects, rather, he was employing a verbal tool to illustrate a greater truth. Many people read the Bible and take it quite mystically. Some Christians think that everything in the Bible must always be taken literally. But if that were true, then a camel might really go through the eye of a needle (Mark 10:25). Clearly, that is impossible. Jesus didn’t mean it literally, he was using a literary device to make a point. Understanding these literary devices in scripture is necessary if we want to understand the Gospel author’s intent and original meaning. While the Bible has some difficult passages, it should be approached like any other book that uses a variety of literary styles, genres, and devices. I’ll touch on this as we move ahead. First, let me address what Jesus meant by “Greater works.” Greater Works Jesus said, “Whoever believes in me will also do the works that I do; and greater works than these will he do” (John 14:12). What was Jesus referring to when he said, “Greater works?” There were, essentially, two things that Jesus did in his three years of ministry. He taught the people and his disciples and he did miracles and healing. It is clear from scripture’s testimony that Jesus’ disciples exceeded Jesus’ work in both areas. Consider that when the Apostle Peter preached his first sermon 3,000 people came to faith in Christ (Acts 2:41). Jesus never did that. That was a “Greater work.” The disciples spread around the known world, lead thousands to Christ and planted numerous churches. Jesus never did that. That was a “Greater work.” We find another example in the Apostle Paul. Paul wrote 13 books of the New Testament. Jesus authored nothing. This is a “Greater work.” Paul gave the church most of its theology. This is a “Greater work.” All of the Apostles and their disciples spread the Gospel from Europe to India within the first 60 years of the church. Jesus never ministered outside of Palestine. This is a “Greater work.” All of the Apostles, except James the brother of John, lived far longer than Jesus and ministered for decades longer than Jesus ever did. This is a “Greater work.” What about miracles? The disciples did some of the same miracles that Jesus did. They healed the lame (Acts 3:7). They restored sight to the blind (Acts 9:18). They healed illness (Acts 28:8). In one instance, handkerchiefs that touched Paul healed people (Acts 19:12). Jesus never did that. I believe that these things are “greater” in that they were miracles performed by the Holy Spirit through sinful, forgiven men, rather than from the sinless, righteous Jesus. It is amazing that sinful men had been given such power. This is a “Greater work.” But noticed what none of the Apostle’s did—they never moved mountains, withered trees, or walked on water. And they certainly didn’t teleport. Now, if the Apostles had the faith to do these things, why then didn’t they move mountains? In fact, Jesus said, “If you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you” (Matthew 17:20). Jesus said that. Jesus only spoke truth. So why don’t we move mountains today? In fact, why hasn’t anyone in the last 2,000 years moved a mountain, ever? Is it a problem with our faith? A Literary Device I don’t believe that Jesus literally meant that we would move mountains anymore than Jesus meant that camels would go through the eyes of sewing needles (Mark 10:25). Rather, Jesus was using a literary device we commonly call, hyperbole. Now, this is a difficult thing for some Christians to accept because many Christians see hyperbole as a form of lying. An exaggerated statement is not necessarily a true statement. In one sense that is correct. However, an exaggerated statement can also be a statement of truth when used in a way to illustrate that truth. This is what hyperbole does. It doesn’t employ falsehood. It is a literary device that employs the absurd to illustrate a common sense truth. This is what Jesus was doing when he said a person with faith can move a mountain. Jesus often used hyperbole to make a point. Look at these examples: Luke14:26, “If any one comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.” Did Jesus literally mean for us to “hate” our families? How about Matthew 6:3? “But when you give alms, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing.” Hands don’t “know” anything. In Mark 10:27 Jesus says, “All things are possible with God.” Really, all things? Can God sin? No! God is incapable of sinning. This is using hyperbole for effect. Many Christians read the Bible without considering that the text they are reading falls under different genre or type as the text progresses. In order to understand the text’s meaning you must understand what genre is being used, otherwise it will be easy to misinterpret what is being read and discover a meaning that was never intended by the author. Faith Some Christians object to the idea that Jesus employed hyperbole in these passages because Jesus said that anyone who has enough faith will be able to do the things he said, like move mountains. But is that really the case? How much faith does it take to move a mountain? A quarter cup? Two-and-a-half gallons? Three pounds? Jesus said that if we have faith as “A mustard seed,” we would move mountains (Matthew 17:20). So the question becomes, do you have the faith of a tiny mustard seed? If that is all that is required to move a mountain, then certainly we need much less faith to command a single grain of sand to move one inch from left to right. Yet, do you have the faith to move a single grain of sand? Have you tried? While I am employing a little hyperbole myself, like Jesus, I am doing so to make a point. Consider that in order for us to be saved and have eternal life we must believe that Jesus Christ rose from the dead bodily never to die again. If you are a genuine Christian then you must believe this. Moreover, you must also believe that someday you will also rise from the dead never to die again, as Paul explained in I Corinthians 15. Do you believe this? Here is my point. Believing in the resurrection of the dead is a hard thing to believe. Remember the Greek’s response to the Apostle Paul when he mentioned Jesus’ resurrection? They laughed at him (Acts 17:32). In Acts 23:6-10 Paul cries out that he believes in the resurrection of the dead and the dissension in the room becomes so great that the people became violent. When Paul stood before Festus at his trial in Acts 26:23-24, upon simply stating his belief in the resurrection of the dead, Festus yelled at Paul, “You are out of your mind!” Believing in the resurrection of Jesus is not an easy thing. There is nothing more miraculous than this. Nothing turns the laws of physics and biology on their heads more than the miraculous resurrection from the dead. Yet, if you believe in the resurrection then you must have the faith to move a single grain of sand one inch from left to right. Which takes more faith, believing in moving mountains or the resurrection? Indeed, the resurrection! Thus, if you believe in Jesus you have that mustard seed of faith and more! So, why haven’t you moved a mountain? It’s not because you don’t have faith, or enough faith. It’s because Jesus was using hyperbole. Besides, moving a mountain is incredibly destructive. Do you imagine Jesus would willy nilly give us all that kind of power? I think not. If you believe in the resurrection then you can believe anything. You have all the faith you need. So, faith is not the issue. Literary genre is the issue.

As a celebration for our twenty-fifth wedding anniversary my husband, Gary and I saved, sacrificed, and trained to carry backpacks across Italy on a Eurail Pass.  Now, that Gary has graduated to heaven I am especially grateful we took the time and the money to take such a priceless trip.  While we were in Rome after seeing the catacombs and the coliseum, we decided to visit the Mamertine Prison where both the Apostles Paul, and Peter were separately imprisoned.  I can’t even imagine writing a positive message from that deep hole, and yet Paul did.  The ceiling was, so low neither Gary nor I had the ability to stand up straight in the cell.  At the top of the ceiling in the center was a round hole that was Paul’s only window or light source, and when it rained it became his leaky roof.   When Paul chooses words like “riches or lavished” in the book of Ephesians to describe the abundance and unmerited spiritual wealth we find in Christ, it is easy for us to forget he is writing from a rotten prison.  Paul’s heart was so enthralled with Jesus his mind became fixed on eternity, because of this he often overlooked his earthly troubles.  Look at his prayer in Ephesians 1:15-23   15) For this reason, because I have heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love toward all the saints, 16) I do not cease to give thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers, 17) that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of him, 18) having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, 19) and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might 20) that he worked in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places, 21) far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and above every name that is named, not only in this age but also in the one to come.  22) And he put all things under his feet and gave him as head over all things to the church, 23) which is his body, the fulness of him who fills all in all. ESV   How is Paul’s prayer different than our prayers?    When we analyze Paul’s prayer we see him asking God for spiritual blessings to be given to the church in Ephesus.  We also seek spiritual blessings in our prayers, but if we are honest we would see that most of our prayers are consumed with asking for God’s intervention in temporal needs.  Did the church in Ephesus not have worldly needs?  Oh yes they did, the believers in Ephesus had some serious problems.  In the book of Acts we learn that the great city of Ephesus was the epicenter for the worship of the goddess Artemis.  People came from throughout the known world to this port city in Asia minor, which is modern day Turkey, to worship and purchase idols of Artemis.  When the silversmiths discerned Paul’s teaching would destroy their ability to market Artemis’ image a riot broke out in Ephesus and a great uproar filled the city.  The Ephesians felt the veneration of idols were essential to a strong economy in their city and this attitude made the life of the believers in Ephesus much more difficult.  This conflict is only one example of the intense religious persecution the early church would suffer under the Romans, and yet Paul does not ask God to free the Ephesians from this trial in his prayer.  Why?   Paul believed spiritual blessings were more important than temporal blessings.  Remember, Paul is writing this prayer from a less than ideal location, prison.  Let me be clear it is never wrong to ask God to meet our physical needs, it is just curious that in this prayer and the other one in Ephesians 3:14-21 . Paul only asked for spiritual blessings.  Do you think that while Paul physically suffered for his faith he gained a special insight?   Paul knew that inner spiritual strength was more important than having our troubles disappear.  He knew that spiritual blessings would strengthen us now, so we could not only endure the trials of this world, but would even show us the riches of eternity.   1) God wants us to know what is the hope to which he has called us.   Our hope is that the God who created the universe can be known.  And, that specifically he desires to know us!  The Greeks had more than one word to describe “knowledge”.  In verse 18 the Greek word translated “know” means:   to understand, to recognize, come to know, or to experience.  The hope to which God has called us needs to be understood, it needs to be recognized, and even experienced and felt.  This phrase, “ the hope to which we have been called ” is an interesting phrase to explore because we know from verse 15 that the believers in Ephesus already possessed a substantial faith in Christ Jesus that Paul admired and they had readily shown a deep love for all the saints.  But, Paul wanted more for these believers.   Why would Paul want their knowledge of this hope to grow?   Paul knew that experiencing this hope would give their hearts greater courage.  Jesus’ call is a call to a relationship with him.  God is always pursuing us and even after he has caught us he wants us to come to know him deeper.  Sometimes scripture calls this pursuit “eternal life” and sometimes it is referred to as “the abundant life”.  For example in John 17:3 Jesus said, “And, this is eternal life that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ who you have sent.” ESV   Eternal life is more than a spot we reserve for ourselves in heaven when we die.  Eternal life is a relationship that starts on this earth, but extends into eternity and will last forever.  Paul wants our faith in Jesus to grow and become our heart’s desire.  Paul knows if our perception of this undying hope increases it will make a huge difference in how we live out our lives in the present.  Paul who writes from a damp prison truly understands the liberating effects of this eternal hope.   God loves us and we will never mature past our need to acknowledge his loving nature.  Our infant faith must enlarge to an emotional rest where we are convinced God is for us no matter what the circumstances are that we are living with.   2) God wants us to know what the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints are.   Who is doing the inheriting in this prayer?  This is the important question.  If we look at how the word “inheritance” is used through out the New Testament and in Paul’s other writings ( Ephesians 1:14 , 5:5 , Colossians 1:12 ) we see the inheritors are the believers of Christ.  For example in Ephesians 1:14 we read this about the Holy Spirit, “who is the guarantee of our inheritance until we acquire possession of it… ” ESV  Paul is teaching that Christ followers are the inheritors and the Holy Spirit who lives within us is our guarantee we will come into this spiritual wealth.   What are these glorious riches we inherit in Christ?  Look at Paul’s words to the elders of the church in Ephesus in Acts 20:32 .  “And now I commend you to God and to the word of his grace which is able to build you up and to give you the inheritance among all those who are sanctified. ” ESV  Paul is asking that we would experience the rich legacy of relationships, teaching, comfort, help and support we find among the body of Christ.   We are endowed with these riches when we participate in the fellowship among those saints who are being sanctified.  Ours is a joint inheritance where we learn to rely on and bless each other.  The word “sanctified” begs for a definition and sometimes the simple definition is the best. To be sanctified is to become what we already are in God’s eyes.  When God looks at us he see us through Jesus’ glorious work on the cross.  The word “Saint” in the scriptures is not used to describe extraordinary Christians, but every day believers.  It is this transforming power of Christ’s sacrifice that invites us into sainthood, not our behavior.  Sanctification is the lifelong process of growing to look like Jesus.  Someday in heaven we will all perfectly reflect Jesus’ image.  Today, Paul desires our hearts would be enlightened so we could begin drawing on this inheritance while we still walk upon the earth.   Even in our conflicts with each other our lives can be enriched as we grow and learn how to relate to each other with greater honesty, kindness and emotional strength.  In Prov. 27:17 the Bible says, “Iron sharpens iron and one man sharpens another. ” ESV  One of the more painful aspects that Covid inflicted on us was our isolation and separation from our faith community.   In Christ, I have inherited a wealth of spiritual and physical resources to help me survive and process the death of my husband.  And, all these riches have passed to me through the hands of loving Christians.  Whether it is my friend Jenny coaching me on how to buy my first car without my husband, or my brother-in-Christ, Rick, stepping forward to sell my camping trailer on Craig’s list, the support of the saints of God have deeply enriched my life and met my needs.  Like the hope to which he has called us, we begin enjoying our inheritance in Christ while we still reside on the earth.  It is also a blessing of eternity.       Another way we can gain access to this spiritual wealth is by studying the writings and the lives of the saints who have gone before us, or who might come from a different culture.  Writers of past generations or from another country will expose us to biblical truths that are often neglected in our day.  Reading truthful biographies of flawed individuals will enrich our lives. Digging into church history will unveil the commonness of all our struggles.  Trust me, there is a glorious inheritance of wisdom, courage and experience in the trials of the saints that will protect us, and we can emotionally relate too.  Can you imagine the leisurely conversations we will someday enjoy with spiritual greats like the Apostle Paul, Hudson Taylor, Corrie ten Boom or Elizabeth Elliott?  If I could recommend only one book on Christian history it would be a biographical history of missions by Ruth Tucker, called From Jerusalem to Irian Jaya.   Tucker’s honest portrayal of imperfect people that God’s still chose to use was liberating for me.   3) God wants us to know the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe.   Paul wants our hearts opened to this power.  Have we truly experienced this immeasurable power?  God wants us to have confidence in his strength.  After Paul makes this statement he is now going to describe the power of God.  Look again at Ephesians 1:19-21 .   19) and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might 20) that he worked in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places, 21) far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and above every name that is named, not only in this age but also in the one to come. ESV   This is the dynamic power God employed to raise Jesus from the dead and then, seated him above all earthly and spiritual powers.  And like our inheritance, and the hope to which he has called us, we become versed in this resurrection power while we still live on earth.  In the glory of heaven we will more fully know it when we are truly raised from the dead, but our learning experiences begin now.  What a great prayer Paul has prayed here.   God wants us to know three things 1) what is the hope to which we have been called –  our hope that the God who created the universe desires a relationship with us, 2) what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints – a joint inheritance we only experience as we live among other Christ followers, and 3) what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe.   Why is it significant that we begin owning these spiritual riches on earth before we die?   How can we now more fully explore this inheritance found among the saints?

Four of my closest friends are widows. Jennifer, a pastor’s wife, lost her godly spouse after his long, grueling bout with brain cancer. My friend Eileen walked into her bedroom to find her husband dead in his bed. Lance, 45, died of sleep apnea. Eileen just thought he was sleeping late. Debby lost her husband and almost lost 18-year-old son to COVID in the same week. Katy found her missionary husband on the kitchen floor, dead from a massive heart attack. Katy’s children reeled from the shock. I have watched all of these women process the painful loss of their spouses. What do I say to them? How can I comfort them? I just chatted with Jennifer about life without Jerry. At first, she was relieved his agonizing fight was over. Then Easter Sunday came. Easter was Jerry’s busiest time at church. The ache of loss seemed overwhelming. The world is full of widows. India, currently center stage during the COVID pandemic, has 41 million widows. According to one news outlet, “…most of us imagine an American woman in her 80s or 90s, but according to the U.S. Census Bureau, the average age of widows is 59 years old, but many are much younger. In fact, almost 2,800 women in the U.S. become widowed every day.” We must come alongside our grieving friends with comfort, companionship and financial aid when they need it. The Bible has some amazing promises about God’s love and protection for widows: Psalm 68:5“A Father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling.” KJV Isaiah 54:5“For your Maker is your husband – the Lord Almighty is His name” KJV Exodus 22:22“Do not take advantage of the widow or the fatherless. If you do and they cry out to me, I will certainly hear their cry.” KJV God has a special place in His Heart for widows. A Widow needs to know she has her family’s support. My friend Debby didn’t have time to grieve. Her husband died suddenly of COVID. She was in the hospital recovering from the debilitating disease herself. Her precious son was seriously ill as well. But the extended family didn’t rally around her. Instead, they called Debby incessantly asking if she had made funeral arrangements for her husband! Debby didn’t receive the comfort and support from her relatives. Instead, she felt isolated and abandoned. Even in death Jesus cared for His widowed mother. The Bible tells us, “Near the cross of Jesus stood His mother, His mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Cleopas and Mary Magdalene. When Jesus saw His mother there, and the disciple whom He loved standing nearby, He said to her, ‘Woman, here is your son,’ and to the disciple, ‘Here is your mother.’ From that time on, this disciple took her into his home” (John 19:25-30). KJV Paul affirmed this principle in 1 Timothy 5:3-8 “If a widow has family members to take care of her, let them learn that religion begins at their own doorstep and that they should pay back with gratitude some of what they have received. This pleases God immensely. Tell these things to the people so that they will do the right thing in their extended family. Anyone who neglects to care for family members in need repudiates the faith. That’s worse than refusing to believe in the first place.” LB Many cultures in our world routinely have widows move in with family members. But in our highly mobile, affluent culture, we frequently leave the isolated, grieving widow to fend for herself. A widow needs emotional support. My friend Eileen confided that losing her husband made her feel like she had lost a limb. Only part of her remained. It took a couple of years to discover who she was apart from Lance. All of her friends were couples. They felt awkward including her in their dinners and holiday celebrations. So, they left her alone. If it hadn’t been for her Sunday School friends and widow support group, she would have grieved so much longer. The sweetest example of emotional support is expressed in the book of Ruth. Ruth recently lost her husband. But her mother-in-law Naomi had lost both her husband and sons. Instead of returning back to her home in Moab, Ruth chose to stay at Naomi’s side. Naomi instructed to go home to her own people. “But Ruth replied, “Don’t make me leave you, for I want to go wherever you go and to live wherever you live; your people shall be my people, and your God shall be my God; 17 I want to die where you die and be buried there. May the Lord do terrible things to me if I allow anything but death to separate us.” Ruth 1:16-17 LB These verses are often used as marriage vows. Ruth made this precious vow to her mother-in-law! A widow needs to know that God loves her and that her loving friends and family are lifting her up in prayer. Most psychologists agree that there are six stages of grief: Shock, Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance. Every one of these stages challenges a widow’s faith. Why did a good God let this happen? Didn’t He want to answer my prayers for healing? What kind of God would abandon me after I loved Him so faithfully? Will He ever answer my prayers again? Jennifer grew up in a pastor’s home. She served in her father’s church for as long as she could remember. Then she married a minister. The couple laid down their lives sharing their faith with others and ministering in the same church for forty years. I love both of them. And yet, even though Jennifer stands firm in her faith, most widows falter in believing God after suffering such a cruel blow. Jesus looked upon the grieving widow of Nain and felt deep compassion for her. He raised her son from the dead and returned him to his mother (Luke 7:11-17) “Not long after that, Jesus went to the village Nain. His disciples were with him, along with quite a large crowd. As they approached the village gate, they met a funeral procession—a woman’s only son was being carried out for burial. And the mother was a widow. When Jesus saw her, his heart broke. He said to her, “Don’t cry.” Then he went over and touched the coffin. The pallbearers stopped. He said, “Young man, I tell you: Get up.” The dead son sat up and began talking. Jesus presented him to his mother.” LB I’m sure this widowed mother had renewed faith in a miraculous God. A WIDOW NEEDS TO KNOW HER LIFE IS NOT OVER. GOD CAN STILL USE HER IN SPECIAL WAYS. When we pray for the beautiful women who have to re-build their lives after the loss of a spouse, we must pray for them to have intimacy with God as never before. We also must ask God to reveal how He can use them in this new phase of life. My favorite passage about a widow who grew in her faith after her husband’s passing is the prophetess Anna, who recognized Baby Jesus as Messiah: “Anna, a prophetess, was also there in the Temple that day…She was very old, for she had been a widow for eighty-four years following seven years of marriage. She never left the Temple but stayed there night and day, worshiping God by praying and often fasting. She came along just as Simeon was talking with Mary and Joseph, and she also began thanking God and telling everyone in Jerusalem who had been awaiting the coming of the Savior that the Messiah had finally arrived.” Luke 2:36-38 NIV Even though there are only a few short verses about Anna, I must believe that she had family and fellow believers who prayed for her in her tragedy. Katy, my missionary friend, could have given up her calling when her husband died. No one would blame her. She had serious, debilitating health problems. But she also had mighty prayer warriors who came alongside of her. Katy now leads Bible studies for diplomat’s wives at the United Nations in New York. She had seen countless women from around the world come to Christ. Just like Anna, Katy’s husband left “too soon.” But God opened doors for this faithful widow. Her ministry is miraculous. I have been inspired and blessed by my precious friends who have lost their husbands. Mary, Ruth, Anna and the widow of Nain remind me that God deeply loves and protects widows. I want to comfort, pray and support them in every way. Look around. They are among you. They need you, too!

.Paths of Wisdom Proverbs 1:1-7 Who can forget the Genie? Mister Aladdin, sir, What will your pleasure be? …take your order, Jot it down You ain't never had a friend like me If you could be granted one wish, what would you ask for? If you have one wish: I wish for a hundred wishes: no! Kid: Super man or Wonder Woman: fly! Teenager: fame. Young adult: love. Parent: sleep. Empty nester: a good retirement. Most people choose happiness. Today, as we start a new series, I’m going to suggest what I think is the most important thing to pursue. More than money. More than happiness. Wisdom. Seek wisdom above all things. A man offered one wish by God. The richest and most successful man in the ancient world, Solomon (971-931 BC) had God come to him and offer him whatever he wanted. 1 Kings 3:9-12: Seek wisdom above all things. God was pleased. Pursue wisdom with your heart and your head. Wisdom is so much more than knowledge or cleverness. Wisdom is spiritual discernment that comes from God. At the core of the book of Proverbs is the pursuit of wisdom. Sermon series. Today. Begin to excavate what wisdom is. As we examine it, our hunger for it will grow. Compare to Burger King. Proverbs 1:7a: “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge…” Not a question of capacity. Not IQ. Wisdom is about the posture of your heart. Proverbs 1:1-7 v. 1-2: Wisdom gives you new eyes. Eph 1:15-18a: 15 For this reason, because I have heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love[f] toward all the saints, 16 I do not cease to give thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers, 17 that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of him, 18 having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, Open the eyes of my heart. Give me spiritual eyes to see. v. 3a: Wisdom is practical: wise dealing. Philosophy major. I’m a knowledge guy. I love facts and tidbits. But a storehouse of facts is not to be confused with wisdom. Jeopardy. Alex Trabek. v. 3b: Wisdom is moral: righteousness, justice, equity. v. 4: Wisdom is for young and old. But with maturity can come greater wisdom. John Maxwell: “Sometimes age comes alone.” Wisdom has a maturity of experience. Similar to plants. The simple are kind-hearted, they are naïve. They are tugged by each argument as it comes and try it out like new clothes. v. 5a-6: Wisdom listens and learns. Wisdom: open ears, closed mouth. Prov 18:13: “If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.” Paths of Wisdom Proverbs 1:1-7 Wisdom begins with listening well, expecting that the other person has something to add to you. 10th grade debate. Cards awaiting a response. Assume you don’t know the answer. Use your ears and not your mouth. Prov 9:9: “Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning.” Prov 22:17: Incline your ear, and hear the words of the wise, and apply your heart to my knowledge, A knowledge bully. Lots of knowledge, but sneers at wisdom. Not interested in a conversation. They’ve been coached. They have no interest in what you say. Princeton. Are you listening to your parents? To your wise friends? To your kids? v. 5b: Wisdom is humble. Wisdom seeks guidance. It does not scoff. Prov 9:8: Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you; reprove a wise man, and he will love you. Listen humbly. A wise person seeks out wisdom and keeps seeking out wisdom. A wise person knows he can learn something from everyone. Zach asks great questions. Carlos in discipleship group: “What do you think?” Not wanting to button everything up quickly. Prov 13:20: “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” Kids choosing friends. Seeking out mentors. Books, television, internet. The voices we listen to. Other cultures. Other times. Start day with the Word of God. Rooted: Vanessa and Zach on patio. Not just another study, but an experience to deepen your relationship with God, his people, and your purpose. It is a catalyst for life change. v. 7a: Wisdom is found in a relationship with God. You cannot have wisdom until you trust the Creator of all things. Wisdom does not deny God, it embraces God. v. 7b: Wisdom is hard working. Not a fool. It’s too hard. They would rather just enjoy life. Scrolling social media. Binging Neflix. Binging news. Playing video games. They have no interest in working hard for wisdom. Transformation can happen. At the heart: openness. Seek wisdom. Prov 8:33-34 (God is depicted as the personification of wisdom) 33 Hear instruction and be wise, and do not neglect it. 34 Blessed is the one who listens to me, watching daily at my gates, waiting beside my doors. Wisdom is Jesus 1 Cor 1:20-24: Jesus is power and wisdom. Ask God for wisdom: Solomon. Above all seek wisdom. Above all seek Jesus. King Solomon advises to pursue wisdom with your heart and your head. Wisdom is so much more than knowledge or cleverness. Wisdom is spiritual discernment that comes from God. Wisdom is so much more than knowledge or cleverness. Wisdom is spiritual discernment that comes from God. Preached at New Life Bible Fellowship. Used by permission.

NATIONAL COMMUNITY CHURCH A Pierced Ear Mark Batterson On December 26, 2004, the third largest earthquake ever recorded by seismograph erupted 10 miles beneath the Indian Ocean. It registered 9.1 magnitude on the Richter scale. It generated the energy equivalent of 23,000 atomic bombs and the shockwaves produces tsunami waves measuring over 100 feet in height traveling 500 miles an hour reaching a radius of 3,000 miles. That earthquake tragically claimed the lives of 227,898 people. But there was one people group living right in the path of the tsunami who somehow survived without a single casualty. The Moken are an Austronesian ethnic group. They lived their lives on the open seas from birth to death. They are sea- based nomads. Their boats are their homes. Their children learn to swim before they learn to walk. They see twice as well under water as we do. And as you would imagine, they have an intimacy with the ocean. They read ocean waves the way we read books. On the day that the Indian Ocean earthquake hit, an amateur photographer from Bangkok was taking pictures of the Moken. There was a moment when the sea began to recede and the Moken began to cry. They knew what was about to happen. The birds had stopped chirping. The elephants headed towards high ground and the dolphins were swimming farther out to sea. The Moken, who were near the coast of Thailand, beached their boats and hiked to the highest elevation. Those who were out to sea went farther out to sea to deep ocean where they knew that the tsunami crest would be minimalized as it past them. The Moken survived because they knew how to look and they knew how to listen and they knew a language that others did not. Six times in the gospels, eight times in the book of Revelation, Jesus says something. Six words and there is an urgency to the exhortation and I think the implications are exponential. He says whoever has ears let them hear. And He is not just talking about the audible voice of God within the human range of hearing. This weekend we continue the series Whisper, how to hear the voice of God. The first language is Scripture is it is in a category by itself. II Timothy 3:16 says that all Scripture is God breathed. When we open the Bible, God opens his mouth and He whispers to us through his Word. But there are six secondary languages that God speaks through n Scripture. Let me tell you what they are. The first language is the language of desire. Psalm 37:4 says delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. The word give in Hebrew means to conceive. In other words, God will birth new desires within you. I think we have this mistaken notion that if we do what God wants He is going to send us somewhere we don’t want to go to do what we don’t want to do and we might be miserable. Listen, that is not the heart of God. That is not the way God works. Now, we have to be careful. There are sinful desires and there are selfish desires but when we delight ourselves in the Lord, when we seek first his kingdom, what happens is God sanctifies our desires. He gives us new desires so that those desires actually become compass needles that point us towards God’s good, pleasing and perfect will. The second language is the language of dreams. Acts 2:17 says I will pour out my Spirit on all people, your sons and your daughters will prophesy, your young men will see visions, your old men will dream dreams. When God fills you with his Spirit, dreams are the supernatural by-product. God wants to anoint your right brain imagination. He wants to give you what I call God ideas and I would rather have a God idea than a thousand good ideas. God whispers, God works in those 86 billion neurons that crisscross the human mind. The third language is the language of doors. One of my most prayed promises is Revelation 3:7 8 What he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open. 8 I know your deeds. See, I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut. Let me say this, you love open doors. But closed doors? Not so much. But it is a package deal. And the older I get I realize that someday we will probably thank God even more for the closed doors than the open doors. The fourth language is the language of people. God used a prophet named Nathan to rebuke a king named David. He used an uncle named Mordecai to exhort a queen named Esther and He used a spiritual father named Paul to encourage Timothy. Numbers 11:29 says I wish all the Lord’s people were prophets. God wants to speak to you through others and He wants to speak to others through you. It is the language of people. The fifth language is the language of prompting. Isaiah 30:21 says Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying this is the way, walk in it. Scripture is our map and the Holy Spirit is our guide. God is ordering your footsteps. He is preparing good works in advance. But we have to discern the promptings of the Holy Spirit if we want to get where God wants us to go. Finally the sixth secondary language is the language of pain. CS Lewis said that God whispers to us in our pleasures but He shouts in our pain. You know what, you could ignore the Bible, you can leave it on the shelf but you know what you can’t ignore? Pain. Listen, pain is a by-product of the curse. Genesis 3. And the day is coming when there will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain. Revelation 20. In the meantime, we better listen to pain. Pain is a marriage counselor. Pain is a life coach. Pain is a professor of theology. Pain teaches us some of the toughest lessons but some of the most important lessons we can learn. Let me go back to this phrase, whoever has ears, let them hear. Jesus is not talking just about physical ears. This isn’t about the audible voice of God in the human range of hearing. This is about learning to discern God’s voice in these different ways. It is discerning desires and dreams and doors. It is reading people and promptings and pain. And that is easier said than done but that’s what Whisper is all about. Author Diane Ackerman tells a funny story about traveling from her home in Waukegan, Illinois to Fayetteville, Arkansas. She had heard about the hot springs and so when she got there, she asked her host in a Midwestern accent if there was a spa. She immediately knew that something got lost in translation. With a confused look on her face and a pretty thick southern accent, the host said spas? You mean Russian spas? It might have got lost in translation again just now. Spa? Spy? Potato? Potato? We generally hear what we want to hear. We don’t actually hear what is being said. Is that not the problem with most relationships? And it is true in a relationship with God too. Sometimes it is what we want to hear least that we want to hear the most. And if we aren’t willing to listen to everything God has to say, eventually we won’t hear anything He has to say. Let me zoom out for a moment. Studies have found that different countries hear differently. The French ear hears best between 1,000 and 2,000 hertz. The British bandwidth is a little bit larger between 2,000 and 12,000 hertz. The American ear hears best between 750 hertz and 3,000 hertz. In other words, there is a French ear, there is a British ear and there is an American ear. Can I suggest that there is a Catholic ear, a Baptist ear, a Pentecostal ear? There is a Democratic ear and a Republican ear. There is a male ear and a female ear. Some would suggest that one works and the other doesn’t! We listen through the filter. We listen through the filter of our history. Our personality, our theology, and that sometimes makes it very difficult to actually hear what God is saying. When Jesus said whoever has ears let them hear, here is what the Jewish ear would have heard. They would have heard an echo of Psalm 40:6 Sacrifice and offering you did not desire. But my ears you have opened. The Hebrew word for open is archeological. It means to excavate. It means to dig through dense material. But it also means to pierce, which has led many Bible scholars to believe that David was tipping his cap to an ancient ritual that was outlined at Mount Sinai. After serving for six years, Hebrew servants would be set free in the seventh year. But if that servant loved that master so much that he did not want his freedom, he was given the option of becoming a servant for life, and the physical symbol of that ancient ritual was a pierced ear. Exodus 21:6 He shall take him to the door or the doorpost and pierce his ear with an awl. Then he will be his servant for life. The Latin word for obey means to give ear. It is literally giving God your ear and saying, God, you get the first word and the last word. It is saying, God, you are going to be the loudest voice in my life. It is listening to God’s whisper even if a thousand people are screaming something different. Why? Because you have a pierced ear. You have an ear that has been consecrated to the Lord Jesus Christ. Surrendering yourself to his Lordship starts with a pierced ear. Over the past decade, I have recorded about a dozen audio books with the same sound engineer. We’ve become friends. Brad is good at what he does. One day we were having lunch in the middle of one of those recordings and he shared something with me that I didn’t know. He said that standard operating procedure for sound mixers in the film and music industries before going into the studio, they let their ears relax and recalibrate through absolute silence. Acoustic ecologists call the process ear cleaning. By definition, white noise is a sound that contains every frequency the human ear can hear and because it contains every frequency, it is very difficult to hear any frequency, especially the still, small voice of God. Listen, chronic noise is one of the greatest impediments to our spiritual growth. Here’s what I know for sure. Your life is too loud and your schedule is too busy! And that is how and why and when we forget that God is God. In the words of John Donne, the English poet and clergymen, he said I neglect God and his angels for the noise of a fly. We are so easily distracted. To fully appreciate what Jesus said, I think a little ear anatomy might help. When sound waves hit our ears, they travel through a labyrinth that Diane Ackerman describes as a miniature golf course. The outer ear functions like a funnel that catches the sound and then it travels through the ear canal and hits the ear drum and those vibrations bump into three of the tiniest bones in the human body. From there those vibrations spiral through a snail shaped tube that contain the cochlea and it contains thousands of microscopic hear cells that amplify sound along the way. From there, the eighth cranial nerve transmits impulses almost like Morse code to the auditory cortex and that is where pitch and volume and tone and distance and direction and meaning are translated into actionable information. Can I just pause right here and say we are fearfully and wonderfully made? And when we read verses like Proverbs 20:12, ears that hear and eyes that see, the Lord has made them both, and we don’t even stop to think about it. What a miracle! When I played basketball in college, no matter how many people were yelling and screaming, I could somehow always hear my dad’s voice. A few weeks ago, when I ran the Chicago marathon, a million there to cheer for me, and the other 45,000 runners in that race, do you know who I heard? Lora and Summer and Josiah. One of the most mysterious capabilities of the human ear is the ability to tune out certain sounds while tuning others in. And the reason is because we actually hear things twice. Audiologically, there is a short time delay between sound waves hitting the outer ear and the then reaching the inner ear. So I go back to what Jesus said and it makes me think. I mean, how often are we guilty of just listening to God with our outer ear? And it is in one ear and out the other, and God is saying I’m speaking to you. I’m giving you this desire. I’m closing that door. This dream is from me. I’m using this person to speak. That prompting is from me. Would you listen to the pain? So God is speaking but so often, it is just the outer ear. And I think part of what Jesus is saying is you have to listen with the inner ear. You have to listen twice. If you are anything like me, it is usually the critical remarks that seem to get to the inner ear and that is how they get in our spirit, and they echo, don’t they? And sometimes it is our own negative self-talk and we beat ourselves up over and over and God is saying, hey, by the way, your sin is forgiven and forgotten, now if you could just forgive yourself and maybe forget for a minute, then we can get about our business. I think sometimes we let the wrong thing get in our spirits and it starts with an ear that is pierced. And that means tuning some things out so that we can tune in the voice of God. Let me switch gears a little bit. This is tough to talk about because it is hard for me to even know how to define it for you and what it might look like in your life but Henry Nouwen said silence, silence is an act of war against the competing voices within us and around us. Some of you need to go to war with some of those competing voices. I love what else he said, when you listen with great attentiveness to the voice that calls you the Beloved, you will discover within yourself a desire to hear that voice longer and more deeply. So here’s my prayer for you, Psalm 46:10 Be still and know that I am God. There is a story told about European missionaries who went to Africa and they hired some of the locals to guide them to where they wanted to go. Well, those guides went at a slower pace than what the missionaries wanted and so after the first two days, they pushed the pace. On day three, they went twice as fast and went twice as far as day two. The missionaries were thrilled with the progress but on day four, their guides refused to break camp. The missionaries asked them what was wrong and the guide simply said, we went so quickly yesterday that we must wait here for our souls to catch up with us. I need my soul to catch up with me. If there is anything I learned from running that marathon, it is that you better run at a sustainable pace if you want to finish the race. And I also know how driven I am. So this is a tough sermon to preach because I’m not great at this, but I’m trying. I went too fast to get to here and I’m guessing some of you feel the same way. Isn’t it interesting how often we try to just manufacture the miracle? And our default setting is ASAP, as soon as possible. We want God to do what God does yesterday. And the process is so hard for us. But sometimes less is more. Sometimes slower is faster. Sometimes quieter is louder. For the past 30 years, an acoustic ecologist named Gordon Hempton has compiled what he calls the list of the last great quiet places. It consists of places with at least 15 minutes of uninterrupted quite during daylight hours. At last count, there were 12 quiet places in the entire United States. And we wonder why the soul suffers. As Hempton noted, quiet is a think tank of the soul. Simply put, I think God speaks loudest when we are quietest. Let me close with this. One of the most played pieces of classical music is Beethoven’s Symphony Number Five in C Minor, immediately recognizable because of that four note motif, the iconic opening. But did you know that it actually begins with an eighth rest? Beethoven put it right at the beginning of the symphony and I don’t know exactly what Beethoven was thinking, I know it was very unique when he did it, but I do know this, that eighth rest was a sonic buffer. If you’ve been to a concert, you know that there is some ambient noise at the beginning. There is conversation between concert goers and there are a few stragglers trying to find their seat, usually in the middle of the row, right? And there is the rustling of programs and I wonder if he wanted a bit of silence at the beginning of this symphony as a form of ear cleaning. All I know is this, we probably need more eighth rests, don’t we. And I don’t’ know exactly what that looks like for you. Social media is white noise and if it is the first thing we check everything morning and the last thing we check every night, as is the case for many of us many mornings and many nights, then I wonder if that is one way we are actually deafening ourselves to the voice of God? Whatever you listen to most, the volume is going to get turned up. I don’t know if you can afford to do this but maybe a two day silent retreat wouldn’t hurt. But even if you can’t do that, somehow finding a way to put an eighth rest at the beginning of your day, I bet it will be more of a symphony. Putting an eighth rest at the end of your day might help you go to sleep a little bit better. Alright, I have two conclusions. Here’s the second one. There are really two ways to read the Bible. Reading the Bible for breadth is called lectio continuum. I think back to our Long Story Short series, 13 weeks through the books of the Bible. It is reading for breadth. The goal is to get the big picture. And listen, that is important. There is this thing called hermeneutics, it is the science of interpreting Scripture and the most basic principle of hermeneutics is this, let Scripture interpret Scripture. You have to let the Old and New Testaments do a little dance. You have to let different principles and different passages juxtapose with one another because text without context is pretext. So lectio continuum is important. You have to have the big picture. But there is a second kind of reading and I think it is more of an inner ear kind of reading. It is lectio Divina. Reading without meditating is like eating without digesting. I think the Bible was meant to be meditated on and prayed through and contemplated on. Lectio Divina has been likened to a meal. There are four steps. Jot these down if you want. It has been likened to a meal and I rather like that analogy. Can I tell you what I did on Tuesday night? When the book releases, we have a little habit that we do a dinner celebration and I felt like it had been a little too long since I had been to Fogo de Chao! Any restaurant that hands you a green card that says yes please and that comes to the table with 13 cuts of meat and that serves these cheese rolls, 16 of which I ate, don’t judge me! I ran a marathon three weeks ago! I am still in the grace period! That meal was lectio Divina! There was this one lady, bless her heart, one of our servers, she came around with bottom sirloin wrapped in bacon! I feel like crying right now. She would come to the table and I eventually just started clapping every time she came by! Do we enjoy the Bible like that? In fact, let me just take one step back and say you tell me how much you enjoy God and I will tell you how spiritually mature you are. Many of us still relate to God out of this place of fear. But perfect love casts out all fear. Listen, these languages are love languages. You don’t need to be afraid of what God is going to say. He loves you! When you succeed, He says, I love you. When you fail, He says I love you. When you have faith, I love you. When you doubt, I love you. I love you! It is who He is and what He does. Alright, lectio Divina, reading is taking the first bite. But let’s not stop there. Meditating is chewing on God’s Word. It is not just reading the Bible, it is letting the Bible read you. It judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart but here’s what I have found, just like pace of life, the pace with which you read the Bible is a good indicator. I have found, confession, when I get to parts of the Bible that I find convicting or confusing, my tendency is to speed read, to almost just read right past it. I mean, let’s get to the good parts right? No, that’s when we need to slow down and actually let that get into the inner ear so that we really hear what God is saying. The third step is prayer and I think this is huge. As you pray through the Word of God, what happens is, in fact 11 times in Psalm 119, the word quicken is repeated and the psalmists says quicken thou me according to thy Word. The word quicken is the word that means physical resurrection. And it is one of the jobs of the Holy Spirit, as we read the Word, and you have to hide it in your heart first, but as you read the Word, the Holy Spirit begins to quicken it. So every time you read the Bible, there ought to be a little resurrection. He wants to bring faith and hope and love back to life. But you can’t just read it and mediate it and pray it, I think you have to contemplate on it. And this is where we absorb the Word and we absorb its nutrients. It is how the Word gets from our head into our heart. It is how the Word gets from the outer ear to the inner ear. So reading, meditating, praying, and contemplating. Lectio Divina. It is drilling down on Scripture. James 1:22 Do not merely listen to the Word and so deceive yourselves, do what it says. So let me close with this. I know we focused more on the first language, Scripture but I think that is a good starting point if you want to learn to discern the voice of God. It starts with Scripture. Peter Marshall, former Chaplin of the Senate said, I wonder what would happen if we all agreed to read one of the gospels until we came to a place that came to a place that told us to do something then went out to do it and only after we had done it, began reading again. I will tell you exactly what would happen, his kingdom would come! And his will would be done on earth as it is in heaven because that’s what happens when hearers of the Word become doers of it. Whoever has ears, let them hear. Let’s pray. Father help us. We want to hear your voice. We need to hear your voice. Lord there is a lot of while noise. There are a lot of competing voices. There is a lot of self-talk. But I pray that You would help us to experience an ear cleaning. God I pray that You would pierce our ears this weekend. That we would give ear to You and really begin to hear and discern, not just your voice but your heart, God. In Jesus name, Amen. “Whoever has ears, let them hear.” It’s only six words, but it’s an urgent exhortation with exponential implications. The word “obey” in Latin means “to give ear.” God speaks in seven languages. The first language is Scripture, and it’s in a category by itself. But there are six secondary languages—desires, dreams, doors, people, promptings, and pain. Your ability to learn those languages is the key to your destiny. Preached at National Community Church.

While speaking about sexual purity at my church several years ago, I told parents that if they’re going to let their children have unrestricted Internet access in the privacy of their own rooms, through computers, tablets, phones, or any other device they might as well buy thousands of pornographic magazines and stack them in their children’s closets and say, “Don’t ever look at those.” It amounts to the same thing. After my message, a sincere Christian mother came up to me. She was offended by my warning to parents not to allow their children to have unmonitored Internet access. “I can’t believe you said that,” she began. “My son has Internet access in his room, and I trust him! He’s a good boy.” I told her, “I was once a seventh grade boy. I’ll tell you right now, you think you’re honoring your son by trusting him, but you are setting him up for a fall. You could hand him a gun, and his life might turn out better than if you just hand him over to the Internet.” If this strikes you as an overstatement, you simply do not understand the devastating effects of pornography. The great majority of children, especially boys but also girls, who are allowed access to pornography will view it, either inadvertently or purposefully, and many of those will become addicted to it, ruining their lives and in many cases ruining their future marriages. That pornography is “harmless” is a lie from the pit of Hell.  Scripture says that Satan goes around like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour, and sadly, we are losing our daughters and our sons. For years, such predictions and warnings sounded like the overreactions of religious zealots. But recently an outpouring of information on the negative impact of pornography is available from mainstream researchers and secular sources. (Even  GQ Magazine  for men shared a piece in 2013 titled, “10 Reasons Why You Should Quit Watching Porn.”) Many researchers recognize, even from their non-Christian worldview, that children’s early exposure to addictive pornography and behavior such as sexting (taking and sharing provocative selfies) is harming them deeply. The cover title for  Time  Magazine’s April 2016 issue was “PORN: Why young men who grew up with Internet Porn are becoming advocates for turning it off.” This lengthy, non-faith based article highlighted the real-life sexual problems that men who grew up with Internet porn are facing in relationships (like not being physically able to become aroused by a real encounter with a woman because of the way porn use has altered their brain’s chemistry/functionality). The New York Times  tweeted this tag line to a recent article: “The longer you wait to give your children a smartphone, the better.” Brian X. Chen writes about how increasingly younger kids are being impacted by pornography and sexting: Ms. Weinberger, who wrote the smartphone and Internet safety book “The Boogeyman Exists: And He’s in Your Child’s Back Pocket,” said she had surveyed 70,000 children in the last 18 months and found that, on average, sexting began in the fifth grade, pornography consumption began when children turned 8, and pornography addiction began around age 11. In an article for  The Atlantic , Hanna Rosin cites research about the wide-spread practice of sexting: A recent study of seven public high schools in East Texas, for example, found that 28 percent of sophomores and juniors had sent a naked picture of themselves by text or e-mail, and 31 percent had asked someone to send one. …boys and girls were equally likely to have sent a sext, but girls were much more likely to have been asked to—68 percent had been.…This year, researchers in Los Angeles published a study of middle-schoolers showing that those who sent sexts were 3.2 times more likely to be sexually active than those who didn’t. A police officer friend told me that hardly a week goes by when he doesn’t get a call from a distraught parent who has discovered nude pictures of their daughter are being sent all over the school or across the country because she posed for a friend, or took the picture herself. Those images can never be fully recalled, nor the shame erased from memory. Officer John Rasmussen, a school resource officer in my area, explained he often shares with families how the devastating effects of sexting and pornography knows no bounds.  “I’ve frequently found the youth involved come from believing families who have raised ‘good kids.’” Christian parents would never have believed it if you had told them 25 years ago that one day most kids would be carrying around a little device that would allow them access to pornography and on which they could receive naked images sent by their classmates while the young person is doing homework, in bed, or sitting in church. Hanna Rosin explains how Major Donald Lowe and his fellow officers at the Louisa County Sheriff’s Office have talked to kids about the consequences of sexting: Lowe’s team explained to both the kids pictured on Instagram and the ones with photos on their phones the serious legal consequences of their actions. Possessing or sending a nude photo of a minor—even if it’s a photo of yourself—can be prosecuted as a felony under state child-porn laws. He explained that 10 years down the road they might be looking for a job or trying to join the military, or sitting with their families at church, and the pictures could wash back up; someone who had the pictures might even try to blackmail them. “Locally we see a blackmail tactic used time and again.  It usually starts with ‘send me just one pic’,” says Officer Rasmussen. “And that first picture may not be considered too provocative by most, but the kid is manipulated with shame and fear that someone will find out. Coercive requests follow, like, ‘Send me more or I’ll send this one out to your friends and family.’ This can very quickly progress to, ‘Now meet me for “_______” (sex act) or I’ll share all the photos.’” I’m a grandparent to five boys, the oldest of them 12. Like many of you, I find this information, and the related statistics, chilling. (And remember, it’s not just boys who are looking at pornography; young girls are too. Nor are girls the only ones participating in sending inappropriate pictures.) The reality is, if you have children in grade school and older, even if they themselves aren’t exposed to or involved in these practices, some of their classmates certainly are, and as the years go on, more will be. So what can concerned parents do? 1. Realize your responsibility to protect your children.  If your child has a smartphone or has access to a phone, a tablet, online gaming console, or a computer, they are vulnerable.   As a parent you might wonder, “Do I have the right to interfere? Isn’t that being nosey?”  Your job is to interfere,  and to know what is going on in your children’s lives, as well as what happens when they’re at friends’ houses and at school. You need to protect them, just as if you were standing next to a freeway and would feel an obligation to put your arms around them and say, “Stay off that freeway.” You and your spouse need to decide what age is appropriate for your children to have their own phone, as well as the capabilities their phone has when do they do get one. (Some parents concerned about being able to safely reach their children have provided a phone that can only make calls and text certain numbers.) 2. Start the conversations about the dangers of pornography now.  Given the ever-younger ages of kids affected, there’s a great advantage in talking to your kids early—probably much earlier than you might think. Several parents I respect have used and recommended the book  Good Pictures, Bad Pictures  by Kristen A. Jenson to talk with their children about the dangers of pornography in an age-appropriate format. (The book also provides positive, practical steps for kids when they are inadvertently exposed to inappropriate images.) Older teens could benefit from the many purity-related resources available from ministries.  (For instance, see my article  Guidelines for Sexual Purity  and Dannah Gresh’s  Seven Secrets to Purity for Every Teen Girl .) Realize too that the conversations shouldn’t be just one time, but ongoing. One mom of boys writes, “What I am coming to see is that my boys and I just have to have conversation after conversation after conversation about the topic and about how most of their friends are going to struggle with this and most of society is struggling with this.” 3. Establish clear guidelines in your family.  Install a pornography-filtering and accountability-reporting program on computers, tablets, and smartphones (realizing it can’t screen out everything). See  this article  for various options. Establish, and enforce, rules in your home about keeping electronic devices, including phones, out of private rooms. (Some families have a “drop basket” or a “station” where everyone, including parents, deposits their phones when they come through the door.) Require that computers and televisions stay in high-traffic areas. 4. Talk to your children about the great rewards and happiness of purity, and the destruction and unhappiness of impurity.  Talk about how  good  sex   can be inside marriage. Explain how sex is one of the best things God has made, but it becomes the very worst—the most devastating—when it is taken out of its God-given context. Scripture, especially in Proverbs 5-7 , provides a great basis to talk to kids about the dangers of impurity and lust. (Some parents have gone through my book  The Purity Principle  with their teens.) This is a battle for our children, with their lives and futures at stake. May Christian parents answer the Lord’s call to protect their children, and train them in the joys of purity. Article Sources Porn Addiction Is Now Threatening an Entire Generation  – Relevant Magazine What’s the Right Age for a Child to Get a Smartphone?  – The New York Times Why Kids Sext  – The Atlantic More Resources Teaching teens about sexual purity isn’t good enough. Here’s why. Protecting Your Family from the Digital Invasion Four Ways Parents Can Protect Their Kids from Sexting Helping Your Child Avoid the Pornography Trap Taking a Stand Against Pornography in Your Home Becoming a Cyber-Savvy Parent Cell Phone Rules Randy Alcorn, founder of EPM

If there is a being up in heaven right now that spoke the world into existence.. If there really is a creator, then why would I value my own opinion so much? When we think about who God is, it puts everything into perspective. In an interview with Christian Sexuality, Francis Chan gives his testimony on his upbringing and relationship with God. Francis dives into the authority of God, denying yourself, and obeying Christ even when you don’t want to. What does it look like to share the hard truth in love for someone even when they don’t want to hear it? What is our responsibility as Christians? www.crazylove.org .