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There are essentially two ways of responding to life’s hurts and unfair experiences. Every time we get hurt, we choose to respond in one of these two ways. The first, natural response is to become a debt collector. We set out to make the offender pay for what he has done. We may be overt or subtle, but until we get a satisfactory apology, until we determine that an adequate penalty has been paid, we intend on keeping the wrongdoer in debtors’ prison; we reserve the right to punish them for their transgression. Instead of releasing our grip on the offenses we’ve received, letting God be the one (the only one) who’s big and strong enough to handle the problem in His perfect, just, and redemptive way, we grab hold of the hurt and refuse to let it go. We hold our offender hostage (we think). But the problem is that being a “debt collector” does more than keep our offender in prison; it puts us in prison. A colleague passed on to me a heartrending story he had heard a woman share with her church family, as the Lord was revealing her need to choose the pathway of forgiveness. As a young girl, she and a little friend of hers in their small town went out one day to see the county sheriff, whose office happened to be in the same building as the town jail. The children had always considered the man to be their friend, the nice person with the uniform and the badge who was just fun to be around. At some point in the afternoon, her girlfriend ran off to play, leaving her alone with the sheriff in his office. Suddenly, the look on his face began making her uncomfortable. The feel of the room became strangely tense and frightening. He moved close to her and whisperingly said, “If you ever tell your parents what I’m about to do to you”—pointing to the iron bars behind him—“I’ll put you in one of those jail cells.” And with that, he proceeded to molest her. The events of that day had occurred many years in the past by the time she finally told the story, as a grown woman, of how the man she thought was a trusted friend had shattered her childhood innocence. Thinking back to what the sheriff had said about locking her up if she were to report him to her mom or dad, she said, “I realize now that in my heart I put him in a ‘jail cell’ that day, and all these years I’ve kept him in that prison.” When God finally opened her eyes to see what unforgiveness was actually doing to her (and to her marriage), she realized something else: on that day so many years ago, she had put herself in jail as well. And though the man was now long dead, unforgiveness and bitterness had kept her locked there—in a cell of her own making—for all those years. Was it her fault for being taken advantage of by an authority figure? Of course not. That cannot be said strongly enough. But who had been hurt the most by her unforgiveness? And why should she be in “jail” for a crime someone else had committed? Debt collecting is the natural response of sinful humans to being harmed, abused, or mistreated. Invariably it produces the bitter fruit of deeper pain, resentment, and bondage. But there is another way . A better way. God’s way. Letting Go As an alternative to being debt collectors—the pathway of resentment and retaliation—God calls us to the pure, powerful choice of forgiveness—and to pursue, wherever possible, the pathway of restoration and reconciliation. “As the Lord has forgiven you,” Paul writes in Colossians 3:13, “so you also must forgive.” The Lord Himself was equally clear and direct: “Whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him” (Mark 11:25 NKJV). “Anything against anyone.” No offense is too great, no offender is beyond the boundary to which our forgiveness must extend. Yes, that kind of forgiveness is unnatural. It’s supernatural. At times it’s almost unbelievable. Ask the surgeon whose medical mistake cost my friend Margaret Ashmore’s mother her life. She had been rushed to the hospital with chest pains, yet was still visibly bright and alert when tests revealed that she had indeed suffered a mild heart attack. It was decided that an angioplasty procedure would be the best route for opening up the perceived blockage in her arteries. She was immediately wheeled into surgery. Everyone expected her to be fine. But sometime during the operation, the doctor inflated the balloon apparatus too quickly, too early. Her damaged heart began to fail irreparably. She sank into a coma and died three hours later. Margaret’s father was inconsolable. His wife of forty-two years—a marriage he had treasured with an intense love and loyalty greater than most—had been taken from him in a matter of moments. For no good reason. By a surgeon’s goof-up. The days that followed were almost too painful for Margaret to bear. Her kind, gentle father was becoming a cyclone of anger, grief, despair . . . revenge! Unrelenting in his rage, tormented by his broken heart, he declared himself on a mission to “bring down that hospital!” Demanding a meeting with the hospital administration and the doctors responsible for his wife’s care, he vowed to tell them to their face that he was suing them all for everything they had . . . and living to see them suffer. As the hospital staff and physicians anxiously awaited the arrival of Margaret’s dad for the confrontation, they trembled at the thought of what they expected to hear. How does someone in their shoes handle a situation like this? You don’t . . . when God does. On his way to the meeting, Margaret’s dad began to realize that if he ever wanted to be free from this dungeon of anger and bitterness in which he was finding himself, he would have to do what God had done for him. He would have to forgive. To the amazement of everyone in the room, as he walked through the door that day, he walked directly over to the man whose misjudgment had ended his dear one’s life, extended his hand to him, and said, “The only way I’m going to be able to live with any peace the remainder of my life is to forgive you.” The doctor began to weep. For what seemed like forever, he couldn’t even let go of the hand of the man who had relinquished his right to retaliate. Two people walked out of that conference room as free men that day—but none more free than the one who offered the release, the one who did the forgiving. © Revive Our Hearts. Used with permission. Excerpted from Choosing Forgiveness: Your Journey to Freedom by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. Available at www.Store.ReviveOurHearts.com www.ReviveOurHearts.com Info@ReviveOurHearts.com

Nearly half of pregnancies among American women are unintended, and four in 10 of these are terminated by abortion. Twenty-two percent of all pregnancies (excluding miscarriages) end in abortion. At least half of American women will experience an unintended pregnancy by age 45, and at current rates, about one third will have had an abortion. So how do we minister to these wounded women? Where do we start? Obviously much counseling and discipleship is needed to mature in their spiritual journey, but I believe the first step is to understand the emotions and struggles they face following their choice. We must do everything we can to prevent abortions, but we must also do all we can to heal those hurting women around us. Here are just a few facts about Post-Abortion Syndrome. Post-Abortion Syndrome (PAS) is a form of post-traumatic stress disorder. The process of making an abortion choice, experiencing the procedure and living with the grief, pain and regret is certainly, at its very core, traumatic. As with any trauma, individuals often try to “forget” the ordeal and deny or ignore any pain that may result. Many simply don’t relate their distress to the abortion experience. At some point, however, memories resurface and the truth of this loss can no longer be denied. During these moments, the pain of post-abortion syndrome reveals itself in the hearts of millions of lives. The symptoms of post-abortion syndrome will not necessarily appear at the same time, nor is likely that any woman will experience the entire list. Some may occur immediately after an abortion and others much later. If you can identify with more than two of these symptoms, it could be that you are experiencing post-abortion syndrome. Below are the symptoms that describe post-abortion syndrome , as described by Dr. Paul and Teri Reisser in their book, Help for the Post-Abortive Woman (now entitled A Solitary Sorrow): 1. Guilt. Guilt is what an individual feels when she has violated her own moral code. For the woman who has come to believe, at some point either before or after the abortion, that she consented to the killing of her unborn child, the burden of guilt is relentless. There is little consolation to offer the woman who has transgressed one of nature’s strongest instincts: the protection a mother extends to her young. In fact, many post-abortive women believe that any unhappy events that have occurred since the abortion were inevitable because they “deserve it.” 2. Anxiety. Anxiety is defined as an unpleasant emotional and physical state of apprehension that may take the form of tension, (inability to relax, irritability, etc.), physical responses (dizziness, pounding heart, upset stomach, headaches, etc.), worry about the future, difficulty concentrating, and disturbed sleep. The conflict between a woman’s moral standards and her decision to abort generates much of this anxiety. Very often, she will not relate her anxiety to a post-abortion syndrome abortion, and yet she will unconsciously begin to avoid anything having to do with babies. She may make excuses for not attending a baby shower, skip the baby aisle at the grocery store, and so forth. 3. Psychological “numbing.” Many post-abortive women maintain a secret vow that they will never again allow themselves to be put in such a vulnerable position. As a result, often without conscious thought, they may work hard to keep their emotions in tight check, preventing themselves from feeling the pain of what has happened, but also greatly hampering their ability to form and maintain close relationships. Cut off even from themselves, they may feel as though their lives were happening to another person. 4. Depression and thoughts of suicide. All of us experience depression from time to time, but the following forms of it are certainly common in women who have experienced abortion: Sad mood —ranging from feelings of melancholy to total hopelessness. Sudden and uncontrollable crying episodes — the source of which appear to be a total mystery. Deterioration of self-concept —because she feels wholly deficient in her ability to function as a “normal” woman. Sleep, appetite, and sexual disturbances — usually in a pattern of insomnia, loss of appetite and/or reduced sex drive. Reduced motivation —for the normal activities of life. The things that occupied her life before the depression no longer seem worth doing. Disruption in interpersonal relationships — because of the general lack of enthusiasm for all activities. This is especially evidenced in her relationship with her husband or boyfriend, particularly if he was involved in the abortion decision. Thoughts of suicide —or preoccupation with death. Not surprisingly, in a study done by the Elliot Institute, some 33% of post-abortive women surveyed reached a level of depression so deep that they would rather die than go on. 5. Anniversary syndrome. In the survey reference previously, some 54% of post-abortive women report an increase of post-abortion syndrome symptoms around the time of the anniversary of the abortion and/or the due date of the aborted child. 6. Re-experiencing the abortion. A very common event described by post-abortive women is the sudden distressing, recurring “flashbacks” of the abortion episode, often occurring during situations that resemble some aspect of the abortion, such as a routine gynecological exam, or even the sound of a vacuum cleaner’s suction. “Flashbacks” also occur in the form of recurring nightmares about babies in general or the aborted baby in particular. These “dreams” usually involve themes of lost, dismembered, or crying babies. 7. Preoccupation with becoming pregnant again. A significant percentage of women who abort become pregnant again within one year, and many others verbalize the desire to conceive again as quickly as possible. The new baby, sometimes referred to as the “atonement baby,” may represent an unconscious desire to replace the one that was aborted. 8. Anxiety over fertility and childbearing issues. A common post-abortion syndrome symptom in women is a fear that they will never again become pregnant or be able to carry a pregnancy to term. Some expect to have handicapped children because they have “disqualified themselves as good mothers.” Many refer to these fears as punishments from God. 9. Interruption of the bonding process with present and/or future children. Fearing another devastating loss, a post-abortive woman may not allow herself to truly bond with other children. Another common reaction is to atone for her actions toward the aborted child by becoming the world’s most perfect mother to her remaining or future children. Likewise, the woman who already had children at the time of her abortion may discover that she is beginning to view them in a different light. At one extreme, she may unconsciously devalue them, thinking things like, “You were the lucky one. You were allowed to live.” Or she may go in the opposite direction and become overly protective. 10. Survival guilt. Most women do not abort for trivial reasons. They are usually in the midst of a heartbreaking situation whereby they stand to lose much if they choose to carry their pregnancies to term. In the end, the decision boils down to a sorrowful, “It’s me or you, and I choose me.” But while the abortion frees them from their current trauma, it frequently produces in them an unrelenting guilt for choosing their own comfort over the life of the child. 11. Development of eating disorders. Some post-abortive women developed anorexia or bulimia. While this phenomenon remains largely unexplored at this time, several factors may contribute to it. First, a substantial weight gain or severe weight loss is associated with unattractiveness, which reduces the odds of becoming pregnant again. Second, becoming unattractive serves as a form of self-punishment and helps perpetuate the belief that the woman is unworthy of anyone’s attention. Third, extremes in eating behavior represent a form of control for the woman who feels her life is totally out of control. And finally, a drastic weight loss can shut down the menstrual cycle, thus preventing any future pregnancies. 12. Alcohol and drug abuse. Alcohol and drug use often serve initially as a form of self-medication—a way of coping with the pain of the abortion memories. Sadly, the woman who resorts to alcohol and/or drugs eventually finds herself having not only more problems but also fewer resources with which to solve them. The mental and physical consequences of alcohol or drug abuse only amplify most of the symptoms the woman is already experiencing. 13. Other self-punishing or self-degrading behaviors. In addition to eating disorders and substance abuse, the post-abortive woman may also enter in abusive relationships, become promiscuous, and fail to take care of herself medically or deliberately hurt herself emotionally and/or physically. 14. Brief reactive psychosis. Rarely, a post-abortive woman may experience a brief psychotic episode for two weeks or less after her abortion. The break with reality and subsequent recovery are both extremely rapid, and in most cases the person returns completely to normal when it is over. While this is an unusual reaction to abortion, it bears mentioning only because it is possible for a person to have a brief psychotic reaction to a stressful even without being labeled a psychotic individual. During such an episode, the individual’s perception of reality is drastically distorted. These individuals should be referred to the care of a professional. For more information see www.RamahInternational.org

What’s a good definition of codependency? In the broadest sense it’s an addiction to people, places, or things. Codependency used to mean that one person was dependent on something like alcohol and the other person simply needed them to be dependent on alcohol, so the second person was codependent. Now it simply means to be dependent, and sometimes dependent on another person who’s also dependent. Many of you have been married . When you got married, you heard the phrase, “The two shall become one.” What you didn’t know was that there was another implied statement or question: “Which one shall they become?” That goes along with another definition. Another definition of codependency is…“Codependency is allowing others to define who you are and how you feel.” Ten Traits of Codependency The codependent is driven by one or more compulsions. Proverbs 19:19 Codependency could be something that looks “good.” Workaholism is a powerful example. Most compulsions are more obviously negative: alcohol abuse, eating disorder, sexual addiction, or counting things. A parent can also live in “rescue” mode to help a child in trouble. Matthew 10:16, Proverbs 19:19, Philippians 1:9, Proverbs 24:11 The codependent is bound and often tormented by the way things were in the dysfunctional family of origin. Proverbs 27:7 Maybe there was “never enough,” so the ghosts of the past scream, “Make more! Spend more!” One example from my own clients is a premarital woman who revealed to me she was molested by someone in her family, and yet waited to discuss it in the last counseling session, a few days prior to the marriage. She wept, but did not want to talk about it. Usually, there’s a yearning to repeat the past over and over until it finally turns out right. The codependent’s self-esteem (and, frequently, maturity) is very low. Numbers 13:33. It probably enabled the person’s survival to believe negative things about themselves. But as an adult, it doesn’t work anymore. Here’s an example: a man came to his son’s baseball game – finally. His son hit a homerun. Dad said, “You weren’t holding the bat right.” What’s the message? “I’m never good enough.” A codependent is certain his or her happiness hinges on others. John 5:44 “You don’t deserve to relax and enjoy yourself.” Or maybe your happiness depended on your behavior when you were growing up. You got strokes for your performance, but for nothing else. Conversely, a codependent feels inordinately responsible for others. Matthew 23:4. I had a client who had to bail his parents out of the bars. Another example was a client who had one parent die, and she had to comfort and take care of everyone else. Perhaps the oldest child simply had to be more responsible. Perhaps one parent elevated the person in the family structure – parentification. The codependent’s relationship with a spouse or significant other Person (SOP) is marred by a damaging, unstable lack of balance between dependence and independence. Ecclesiastes 7:18 The codependent doesn’t want to be abandoned, but also doesn’t want to be swallowed up. Two examples would be married couples that move in and out of the house, or they argue to keep their distance, but passionately “make up.” The codependent is a master of denial and repression. Proverbs 4:19. The controlling person who says his control is just “love.” “As if the gourmet’s love for pork could be called love from the pig’s vantage point.” A codependent worries about things he or she can’t change and may well try to change them. Luke 12:13-15 A few examples would be to get someone to stop drinking or smoking marijuana; to stop playing computer games; to stop staying out late at night; to get a better job. A codependent’s life is punctuated by extremes. Mark 7:6 The codependent person is on a high when he or she is treated nice, but on a low when ignored. They are controlling, then passive. 10. A codependent is constantly looking for the something that is missing or lacking. Often demanding of TOO MUCH TIME with someone. Ephesians 4:19 They thinking that they can be complete if they can just find the right person, go live in San Diego, buy a 2009 Mustang, make more money, etc. Primary Causes of Codependency Unmet emotional needs (and you didn’t know how to ask for them to be met). Anything can blunt the pain, including “religiosity.” A lost childhood (as with Michael Jackson; perhaps you had to “take care” of your family). Some people turn their children into the parents in order to recapture their own childhood. A compulsion to fix the dysfunctional family of origin (may have enabled your survival). So now this kind of person is “fixing” everyone else, hoping to fix his family and maybe himself. Ten Stages of the Recovery Process 1. EXPLORATION AND DISCOVERY : Explore your past and present to discover the truth about yourself. RELATIONSHIP HISTORY/INVENTORY : Examine and perhaps reset your personal boundaries. ADDICTION CONTROL: Get a handle on your addictions and compulsions and take the first steps toward mastering them. For example, identify triggers and strategize for staying away from harmful relationships. LEAVING HOME AND SAYING GOODBYE: Say the goodbyes that are appropriate to healing. You may think you said goodbye years ago. Probably you didn’t. Mend relationships with your family of origin, if possible. GRIEVING YOUR LOSS: Grieving is both the bottom of the curve, the very pits of your emotions and feelings, and also the start upward. It’s almost like your dentist hanging up his drill. You know he’s not done yet, but the worst is over. NEW SELF-PERCEPTIONS: Gain fresh perceptions about yourself and make new decisions. Learn to accept yourself as imperfect! What an eye-opener this stage is! NEW EXPERIENCES : Build a foundation of new experiences to bolster the decisions you’ve just made. Learn to proactively meet your emotional needs appropriately. Build new friendships with trustworthy people of integrity. RE-PARENTING: Rebuild your past in a sense, and also the present and future with new decisions about yourself, others, the world, and your future, as you become involved in what we call re-parenting. To re-parent yourself properly, you need to call God your ultimate Father. RELATIONSHIP ACCOUNTABILITY: Establish accountability for your new and refreshed personal relationships. MAINTENANCE: Embark on a maintenance program that will keep you on track for the remainder of your life. Think in terms of your social, psychological, physical, and spiritual well-being. Think in terms of normal Christian discipleship. Ask God for patience and let time go by! BECOME MORE CHRIST-CENTERED AND LESS SELF-CENTERED!

Jesus takes the way we see people and flips it upside down. His love moves us to love everyone, including Muslims. Let God speak to you as you read this article from Frontiers USA. 1) God loves Muslims! Muslims are loved by God in the same way that He loves all people. Like all humans, Muslims are created in the image of God (Genesis 1:26-27). Like all humans, Muslims sin and fall short of God’s glory (Romans 3:23). Like all humans, God loved them so much that He sent His Son, so that those who believe in Jesus will have eternal life (John 3:16). 2) God calls Muslims to Himself! God designed all of us to seek after Him. That includes Muslims. “From one man, He made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth…God did this so men would seek Him and perhaps reach out to Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us. For in him we live and move and have our being” (Acts 17:24-31, espec. 26,30). Like you and I, God has placed “eternity in their hearts” (Ecclesiastes 3:11). 3) Muslims are our neighbors. Whether in America or in the Middle East, the overwhelming majority of Muslims are peace-loving, hospitable people. 4) Muslims are people like us! Most Muslims are concerned about the same things as you and I. They want to raise their children well, they are concerned about rising crime and pornography, and they work hard to pay their bills and survive. Like us, most Muslims decry human suffering and violence between peoples. Like many westerners, a large majority of Muslims yearn for peace, friendship, and a happy life. 5) God is at work among Muslims! Many Muslims are sensitive to God and spiritual things. Because they fear God and are aware of spiritual reality, Muslims often speak of how God appeared to them through dreams and visions (see Acts 10:1-8 for an example of this). Stories abound of healings because of God’s power through Jesus’ name. An increasing number of Muslims are hungry to know about God’s dramatic work through Jesus. 6) We are spiritually related. All Muslims look to ‘Ibrahim’ (Abraham) as “our forefather” (Romans 4:1). Since those who follow Jesus call Abraham “the father of all who believe” (Romans 4:11), that makes us ‘cousins’ ! Like us, Muslims believe in one true God, the Creator of all peoples. 7) They value our Holy Book and Jesus. The Qur’an specifically commends the Torat (books of the Law, the first five books of the Bible); the Zibur (the Psalms, or wisdom literature); and the Injil (the Gospels). According to the Qur’an, Jesus was sent by God to earth; He healed many during his ministry; and He is returning to judge the living and the dead. 8) Muslims have some things to teach us. Muslims take the spiritual world very seriously and generally are more open to discuss spiritual issues. They have a very high respect for God and His power. Muslims place a high value on community and loyalty. Hospitality is very important to them. These are qualities that most westerners appreciate in their Muslim friends. 9) God made promises to their ancestors. Many Muslims look to ‘Ibrahim’ (Abraham) as their ancestor through his first son, Ishmael. God made this promise to Ibrahim: “As for Ishmael, I have heard you; behold, I will bless him, and I will make him fruitful, and I will multiply him. He shall become the father of twelve princes, and I will make him a great nation” (Genesis 17:20). God fulfilled this promise, for there are 1.6 billion Muslims in the world today! 10) God promised that Muslims who follow Jesus will be part of the multitudes who are gathered about the Throne of God. When God gathers all His people at the end of time, there will be representatives from every people group on the earth, “from every nation and tribe and people and language, standing before the Throne and before the Lamb, clothed in white robes . . . crying out in a loud voice, ‘Salvation to our God who sits on the throne . . .”(Revelation 7:9,10)! http://www.frontiersusa.org . Used by permission.

Here are just a few indicators of pride and humility to help you discern where you are on your spiritual journey. Be patient. Surrender to the Holy Spirit and He will develop these beautiful qualities of humility in your life. Proud people focus on the failures of others. Broken people are overwhelmed with a sense of their own spiritual need. Proud people have a critical, fault-finding spirit; they look at everyone else’s faults with a microscope but their own with a telescope. Broken people are compassionate; they forgive much because they know how much they have been forgiven. Proud people are self-righteous; they look down on others. Broken people esteem all others better than themselves. Proud people have an independent, self-sufficient spirit. Broken people have a dependent spirit; they recognize their need for others. Proud people have to prove that they are right. Broken people are willing to yield the right to be right. Proud people claim rights; they have a demanding spirit. Broken people yield their rights; they have a meek spirit. Proud people are self-protective of their time, their rights, and their reputation. Broken people are self-denying. Proud people desire to be served. Broken people are motivated to serve others. Proud people desire to be a success. Broken people are motivated to be faithful and to make others a success. Proud people desire self-advancement. Broken people desire to promote others. Proud people have a drive to be recognized and appreciated. Broken people have a sense of their own unworthiness; they are thrilled that God would use them at all. Proud people are wounded when others are promoted and they are overlooked. Broken people are eager for others to get the credit; they rejoice when others are lifted up. Proud people have a subconscious feeling, “This ministry/church is privileged to have me and my gifts”; they think of what they can do for God. Broken people’s heart attitude is, “I don’t deserve to have a part in any ministry”; they know that they have nothing to offer God except the life of Jesus flowing through their broken lives. Proud people feel confident in how much they know. Broken people are humbled by how very much they have to learn. Proud people are self-conscious. Broken people are not concerned with self at all. Proud people keep others at arms’ length. Broken people are willing to risk getting close to others and to take risks of loving intimately. Proud people are quick to blame others. Broken people accept personal responsibility and can see where they are wrong in a situation. Proud people are unapproachable or defensive when criticized. Broken people receive criticism with a humble, open spirit. Proud people are concerned with being respectable, with what others think; they work to protect their own image and reputation. Broken people are concerned with being real; what matters to them is not what others think but what God knows; they are willing to die to their own reputation. Proud people find it difficult to share their spiritual need with others. Broken people are willing to be open and transparent with others as God directs. Proud people want to be sure that no one finds out when they have sinned; their instinct is to cover up. Broken people, once broken, don’t care who knows or who finds out; they are willing to be exposed because they have nothing to lose. Proud people have a hard time saying, “I was wrong; will you please forgive me?” Broken people are quick to admit failure and to seek forgiveness when necessary. Proud people tend to deal in generalities when confessing sin. Broken people are able to acknowledge specifics when confessing their sin. Proud people are concerned about the consequences of their sin. Broken people are grieved over the cause, the root of their sin. Proud people are remorseful over their sin, sorry that they got found out or caught. Broken people are truly, genuinely repentant over their sin, evidenced in the fact that they forsake that sin. Proud people wait for the other to come and ask forgiveness when there is a misunderstanding or conflict in a relationship. Broken people take the initiative to be reconciled when there is misunderstanding or conflict in relationships; they race to the cross; they see if they can get there first, no matter how wrong the other may have been. Proud people compare themselves with others and feel worthy of honor. Broken people compare themselves to the holiness of God and feel a desperate need for His mercy. Proud people are blind to their true heart condition. Broken people walk in the light. Proud people don’t think they have anything to repent of. Broken people realize they have need of a continual heart attitude of repentance. Proud people don’t think they need revival, but they are sure that everyone else does. B roken people continually sense their need for a fresh encounter with God and for a fresh filling of His Spirit. May God bless you with a gracious, humble heart! http://www.reviveourhearts.com . Used by permission.

As the holidays approach, I am reminded of the importance of family. Beloved, I have a real, live family. We don’t live in Stepford. We live in Realville. We still have some fights and hurt feelings at our house. We love passionately and can tangle passionately. Read the words of tiny Psalm 133-David penned these three verses about unity and family. “How wonderful it is, how pleasant, when brothers live together in harmony. For harmony is as precious as the fragrant anointing oil that was poured over Aaron’s head, that ran down his beard and onto the border of his robe. Harmony is as refreshing as the dew from Mount Hermon that falls in the mountains of Zion. And the Lord has pronounced His blessing, even life forevermore.” (NLT) Psalms are for real people-not robots. We are creatures with all kinds of hang-ups and emotional needs. Bible-time dads probably got upset with their kids just the same as daddies in our day. Did Bible mommies get PMS? Of course! Family feuds and irritating relationships are timeless. Psalm 133 was written as a collection of psalms called the Psalms of Ascents. These succinct poems were spoken or sung by pilgrims as they journeyed to the Temple in Jerusalem for feast days. Have you ever taken a road trip with your extended family? Jewish relatives relished such reunions. But as the journey continued, they probably remembered how annoying some of their kinfolks’ personal habits could be to the others of their clan. They forgot that Uncle Hosea spits, or that cousin Jedediah eats with his mouth open, And how Gran-Bethlebigma takes her wooden teeth out after dinner. Journeying in a caravan over long distances only exacerbates relational challenges. David taught in this psalm that unity is hard-won, but totally worth it. Unity-oneness intimacy-allows the anointing oil of the Holy Spirit to fill hearts and homes. There’s nothing like it. We probably have no say about the kin God gave us. Even the challenges they pose can be effective motivation to seek His throne, His help and His healing. Friends are family you got to choose, but you may not grow spiritually and emotionally if you refuse to face the tests of family life. We can choose our companions according to affinity and common interests. We can drop friends more easily if the relationship becomes awkward, painful or inconvenient. But we may not be the better for it. Where would our prayer lives be? Where would we learn tolerance, unselfishness, and flexibility? Who in our lives would motivate us to change? Family members quickly learn that a fight need not be a fatality. Conflict may be healthy. Forgiveness is a learned art all should practice. God often uses other people as the chisel to carve true integrity into our rough personalities. A chisel that never scrapes the stone is useless. The New Interpreter’s Bible commentary says, “The family is a crucial institution. If affects everyone, for good or ill. By its very nature, it can be the place where one experiences and learns intimacy, love and growth, or it can be the place where one experiences and learns resentment, abuse and destructive behaviors.” Having a close family requires a dose of humility, a lot of patience, and a lot of unconditional love. But at the conclusion of Psalm 133 God promises that His refreshing blessing, His Divine presence and long life will result when we choose to be family peacemakers! May you be filled with His Spirit this wonderful Christmas season! Excerpts from Stepping Up: A Journey through the Psalms of Ascents by Beth Moore. Nashville: Lifeway Press, 2007, pp. 154-156.

Have you ever found yourself making (or thinking) any of the following statements? As you work through this exercise, consider how God may want to adjust your thinking as it relates to the issue of forgiveness. 1. “There’s no unforgiveness in my heart.” Do you still feel angry at the person who hurt you? Do you have a secret desire to see them pay for what they did to you? Do you find yourself telling others how they hurt you? If you answered yes to any of those questions, it’s an indication you have not fully forgiven one or more people who have sinned against you. 2. “There’s no way I could ever forgive [person] for [offense]. He (she) hurt me too deeply.” How has God dealt with us who have sinned against Him so greatly? (See Ephesians 2:4–5; Isaiah 43:25; Hebrews 10:17; Micah 7:18–19.) How does the New Testament command us to respond to those who wrong us? (See Luke 6:27; Luke 17:3–4; Romans 12:17–21.) 3. “They don’t deserve to be forgiven.” What did we do to earn or deserve God’s forgiveness? (See Romans 5:8; Ephesians 2:4–9). 4. “If I forgive them, they’re off the hook!” Letting the offender off your hook does not mean they are off God’s hook. Forgiveness involves transferring the prisoner over to the One who is responsible for meting out justice. It relieves us of the burden and responsibility to hold them in prison ourselves. 5. “I’ve forgiven them, but I’ll never be able to forget what they did to me.” When God forgives us, what does He promise to do? (See Jeremiah 31:34; Hebrews 10:17; Psalm 103:12.) God does not ask us to forget the wrong that has been done to us, but simply to forgive. However, the attitude of our heart, when we think of the offense, can be an indicator of whether or not we have truly forgiven. 6. “I believe I have forgiven, but I still struggle with feelings of hurt.” What must we be willing to do in addition to forgiving those who sin against us? (See Luke 6:27–31; Romans 12:17–21.) The act of forgiveness is only the starting place for dealing with those who wrong us. It must be followed by a commitment to “return good for evil.” This investment is the key to experiencing emotional healing and wholeness. In situations where it is not possible or appropriate to rebuild the relationship with an individual, we can still invest in their life through prayer. 7. “I won’t forgive!” Ultimately, forgiveness comes down to a choice. It is a choice that God both commands and enables. But some simply refuse to make that choice. What can we expect if we refuse to forgive those who sin against us? (See Matthew 6:14–15; Matthew 18:32–35; 2 Corinthians 2:10–11). Choosing the pathway of forgiveness can be extremely difficult. You may have been sinned against in ways that have caused enormous pain and consequences in your life. Just reading this may be opening up some wounds or memories you’d just as soon not face. Be assured that if you are willing to walk into the pain, God will go there with you. Hard as it may be to forgive those who have sinned against you, you will experience great freedom as you choose to obey God, by His grace. © Revive Our Hearts. Used with permission. Adapted from Seeking Him: Experiencing the Joy of Personal Revival by Nancy Leigh DeMoss & Tim Grissom

In the counseling office, I rarely feel under pressure to answer people’s questions, or to defend God. I know that as I “come along side” hurting people, God’s comfort will overflow, and He will also give me the words to speak. Although God uses my counseling skills and abilities, my desire is not to receive personal praise, but to help the hurting and to glorify Christ. I’ve found that God has never let me down in the counseling office and that He truly heals and also answers the prayers of all that call upon Him in sincerity. Sometimes all a hurting person needs from us is to spend time with them and hurt with them. In so doing, we are imitating our heavenly Father. Isaiah 63:9 says, “In all their distress, HE TOO IS DISTRESSED, and the angel of His presence saved them. In His love and mercy He redeemed them; He lifted them up and CARRIED them all the days of old.” WHEN WE HURT, GOD HURTS, and His desire is to carry us through our difficult times. Of course, when we don’t FEEL “carried,” it’s important to be thankful for what blessings we can identify. Oftentimes, it’s only when we look back on our struggles that we recognize miracles, small and sometimes large, that God performed in order to help us. The Apostle Paul – who saw the risen Christ when he was on his way to persecute and murder Christians – said to “rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep” (Romans 12:15). Paul also said that God “comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows” (2 Corinthians 1:4-6). People who are hurting need our presence, our comfort, and God’s presence through us more than they need our teachings. When Job was greatly afflicted, three men came to comfort him. They sat silently with him and also offered words of comfort. However, they ended up inquiring what Job had done wrong that he was suffering so. Now famous as “Job’s comforters,” these men brought Job no comfort at all, which is why they are famous! However, when Job PRAYED FOR these men, Job was commended by God, and what had been taken from him was restored two-fold. “Job’s comforters” received God’s correction, not His approval. Likewise, when we give comfort to those who are hurting, as our first priority, we receive God’s approval and eventually His blessings._

Post-Abortion Syndrome (PAS) is a form of post-traumatic stress disorder. The process of making an abortion choice, experiencing the procedure and living with the grief, pain and regret is certainly, at its very core, traumatic. As with any trauma, individuals often try to “forget” the ordeal and deny or ignore any pain that may result. Many simply don’t relate their distress to the abortion experience. At some point, however, memories resurface and the truth of this loss can no longer be denied. During these moments, the pain of post-abortion syndrome reveals itself in the hearts of millions of lives. The symptoms of post-abortion syndrome will not necessarily appear at the same time, nor is likely that any woman will experience the entire list. Some may occur immediately after an abortion and others much later. If you can identify with more than two of these symptoms, it could be that you are experiencing post-abortion syndrome. Below are the symptoms that describe post-abortion syndrome, as described by Dr. Paul and Teri Reisser in their book, Help for the Post-Abortive Woman (now entitled A Solitary Sorrow): 1. Guilt. Guilt is what an individual feels when she has violated her own moral code. For the woman who has come to believe, at some point either before or after the abortion, that she consented to the killing of her unborn child, the burden of guilt is relentless. There is little consolation to offer the woman who has transgressed one of nature’s strongest instincts: the protection a mother extends to her young. In fact, many post-abortive women believe that any unhappy events that have occurred since the abortion were inevitable because they “deserve it.” 2. Anxiety. Anxiety is defined as an unpleasant emotional and physical state of apprehension that may take the form of tension, (inability to relax, irritability, etc.), physical responses (dizziness, pounding heart, upset stomach, headaches, etc.), worry about the future, difficulty concentrating, and disturbed sleep. The conflict between a woman’s moral standards and her decision to abort generates much of this anxiety. Very often, she will not relate her anxiety to a post-abortion syndrome abortion, and yet she will unconsciously begin to avoid anything having to do with babies. She may make excuses for not attending a baby shower, skip the baby aisle at the grocery store, and so forth. 3. Psychological “numbing. ” Many post-abortive women maintain a secret vow that they will never again allow themselves to be put in such a vulnerable position. As a result, often without conscious thought, they may work hard to keep their emotions in tight check, preventing themselves from feeling the pain of what has happened, but also greatly hampering their ability to form and maintain close relationships. Cut off even from themselves, they may feel as though their lives were happening to another person. 4. Depression and thoughts of suicide. All of us experience depression from time to time, but the following forms of it are certainly common in women who have experienced abortion: Sad mood —ranging from feelings of melancholy to total hopelessness. Sudden and uncontrollable crying episodes— the source of which appear to be a total mystery. Deterioration of self-concept —because she feels wholly deficient in her ability to function as a “normal” woman. Sleep, appetite, and sexual disturbances — usually in a pattern of insomnia, loss of appetite and/or reduced sex drive. Reduced motivation —for the normal activities of life. The things that occupied her life before the depression no longer seem worth doing. Disruption in interpersonal relationships — because of the general lack of enthusiasm for all activities. This is especially evidenced in her relationship with her husband or boyfriend, particularly if he was involved in the abortion decision. Thoughts of suicide —or preoccupation with death. Not surprisingly, in a study done by the Elliot Institute, some 33% of post-abortive women surveyed reached a level of depression so deep that they would rather die than go on. 5. Anniversary syndrome. In the survey reference previously, some 54% of post-abortive women report an increase of post-abortion syndrome symptoms around the time of the anniversary of the abortion and/or the due date of the aborted child. 6. Re-experiencing the abortion. A very common event described by post-abortive women is the sudden distressing, recurring “flashbacks” of the abortion episode, often occurring during situations that resemble some aspect of the abortion, such as a routine gynecological exam, or even the sound of a vacuum cleaner’s suction. “Flashbacks” also occur in the form of recurring nightmares about babies in general or the aborted baby in particular. These “dreams” usually involve themes of lost, dismembered, or crying babies. 7. Preoccupation with becoming pregnant again. A significant percentage of women who abort become pregnant again within one year, and many others verbalize the desire to conceive again as quickly as possible. The new baby, sometimes referred to as the “atonement baby,” may represent an unconscious desire to replace the one that was aborted. 8. Anxiety over fertility and childbearing issues . A common post-abortion syndrome symptom in women is a fear that they will never again become pregnant or be able to carry a pregnancy to term. Some expect to have handicapped children because they have “disqualified themselves as good mothers.” Many refer to these fears as punishments from God. 9. Interruption of the bonding process with present and/or future children. Fearing another devastating loss, a post-abortive woman may not allow herself to truly bond with other children. Another common reaction is to atone for her actions toward the aborted child by becoming the world’s most perfect mother to her remaining or future children. Likewise, the woman who already had children at the time of her abortion may discover that she is beginning to view them in a different light. At one extreme, she may unconsciously devalue them, thinking things like, “You were the lucky one. You were allowed to live.” Or she may go in the opposite direction and become overly protective. 10. Survival guilt . Most women do not abort for trivial reasons. They are usually in the midst of a heartbreaking situation whereby they stand to lose much if they choose to carry their pregnancies to term. In the end, the decision boils down to a sorrowful, “It’s me or you, and I choose me.” But while the abortion frees them from their current trauma, it frequently produces in them an unrelenting guilt for choosing their own comfort over the life of the child. 11. Development of eating disorders. Some post-abortive women developed anorexia or bulimia. While this phenomenon remains largely unexplored at this time, several factors may contribute to it. First, a substantial weight gain or severe weight loss is associated with unattractiveness, which reduces the odds of becoming pregnant again. Second, becoming unattractive serves as a form of self-punishment and helps perpetuate the belief that the woman is unworthy of anyone’s attention. Third, extremes in eating behavior represent a form of control for the woman who feels her life is totally out of control. And finally, a drastic weight loss can shut down the menstrual cycle, thus preventing any future pregnancies. 12. Alcohol and drug abuse. Alcohol and drug use often serve initially as a form of self-medication—a way of coping with the pain of the abortion memories. Sadly, the woman who resorts to alcohol and/or drugs eventually finds herself having not only more problems but also fewer resources with which to solve them. The mental and physical consequences of alcohol or drug abuse only amplify most of the symptoms the woman is already experiencing. 13. Other self-punishing or self-degrading behaviors. In addition to eating disorders and substance abuse, the post-abortive woman may also enter in abusive relationships, become promiscuous, and fail to take care of herself medically or deliberately hurt herself emotionally and/or physically. 14. Brief reactive psychosis. Rarely, a post-abortive woman may experience a brief psychotic episode for two weeks or less after her abortion. The break with reality and subsequent recovery are both extremely rapid, and in most cases the person returns completely to normal when it is over. While this is an unusual reaction to abortion, it bears mentioning only because it is possible for a person to have a brief psychotic reaction to a stressful even without being labeled a psychotic individual. During such an episode, the individual’s perception of reality is drastically distorted. These individuals should be referred to the care of a professional. These women need comfort, counsel and prayer. For more information see www.RamahInternational.org © Ramah International. Used with permission. www.ReviveOurHearts.com

Jim Rohn says that small disciplines move us toward success and lead to more disciplines. He advises that we read, journal, and turn our philosophies (e.g., “I am a spiritual and moral being before I’m anything else”) and values (e.g., “I highly value service to God and man”) into activity. “It is not what we get that makes us valuable, it is what we become in the process of doing that brings value into our lives” (“The Five Major Pieces to the Life Puzzle”). Rohn agrees with the biblical ratio of work to rest: Six days of work and one day of rest. “Rest should be a necessary pause in the process of preparing for an assault on the next objective and the next discipline. The punishment for excessive rest is mediocrity.” Facing our present reality contains the kernel of miracles, says Rohn. Robert Schuler said, “Anyone knows how many seeds are in an apple, but only God knows how many apples are in a seed.” When we face reality, still not knowing specifics of the future, that’s a good time to move forward! Acting with faith and integrity, we can enter into all that God has for us. “You can’t get what you’ve never had unless you’re willing to do what you’ve never done” (“212˚,” by Parker & Anderson). Be proactive. Just do it! In the recent Winter Olympics, Michael Phelps won the 100 meter butterfly by .01 seconds. While second place glided to the finish line, Michael gave it one more stroke and won by a fingernail. Michael’s time was 50.08 seconds while Milorad Cavic’s time was 50.09. Of course, Phelps won more Olympic gold medals than anyone in history. Michael just kept doing it! He said about that one race, “If I would have glided, I would have lost the race.” We can’t glide to the finish lines of our lives and expect to excel. Christ said, “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked” (Luke 12:48). In Matthew 25, Christ tells a parable of the rewards of good stewardship over what God has given us. Christ highly valued our activities and said that we could know who people are by looking at their “fruit” (Matthew 7:16, 20). God rewards both faith and industriousness. Of course, productive activity begins with God’s grace to give us faith. If our activities are to have eternal significance, they must proceed from relationship with the Giver of Life and from godly, noble values. With God’s help, this is how to achieve a life that blesses others, pleases God, and is truly a joy to live!

Wounding is inevitable if we are following Christ. Jesus was both “marred” (Isa. 52:14) and “wounded” (Zech. 13:6), and if we are sincere in our pursuit of His nature, we will suffer as well. How else can love be perfected? Yet, let us beware. We either become Christlike and forgive, or we enter a spiritual time warp where we abide continually in the memory of our wounding. Like a systemic disease, the hurtful memories destroy every aspect of our reality. In truth, apart from God, the wounding that life inflicts is incurable. God has decreed that only Christ in us can survive. Intercessors live on the frontier of change. We are positioned to stand between the needs of man and the provision of God. Because we are the agents of redemption, Satan will always seek the means to offend, discourage, silence, or otherwise steal the strength of our prayers. The wounding we receive must be interpreted in light of God’s promise to reverse the effects of evil and make them work for our good (Rom. 8:28). Since spiritual assaults are inevitable, we must discover how God uses our wounds as the means to greater power. This was exactly how Christ brought redemption to the world. Jesus knew that maintaining love and forgiveness in the midst of suffering was the key that unlocked the power of redemption. Isaiah 53:11 tells us, “By His knowledge the Righteous One, My Servant, will justify the many, as He will bear their iniquities.” Jesus possessed “revelation knowledge” into the mystery of God. He knew that the secret to unleashing world-transforming power was found at the cross. The terrible offense of the cross became the place of redemption for the world. Yet, remember, Jesus calls us to a cross as well. (See Matthew 16:24.) Wounding is simply an altar upon which our sacrifice to God is prepared. Listen again to Isaiah’s prophetic description of Jesus’ life. His words, at first, seem startling, but as we read, we discover a most profound truth concerning the power of woundedness. He wrote, “But the Lord was pleased to crush Him, putting Him to grief; if He would render Himself as a guilt offering, He will see His offspring, He will prolong His days, and the good pleasure of the Lord will prosper in His hand” (Isa. 53:10). How did Jesus obtain the power of God’s pleasure and have it prosper in His hands? During His times of crushing, woundedness, and devastation, instead of retaliating, He rendered Himself “as a guilt offering.” The crushing is not a disaster; it is an opportunity. You see, our purposeful love may or may not touch the sinner’s heart, but it always touches the heart of God. We are crushed by people, but we need to allow the crushing to ascend as an offering to God. The far greater benefit is the effect our mercy has on the Father. If we truly want to be instruments of God’s good pleasure, then it is redemption, not wrath, that must prosper in our hands. So, when Christ encounters conflict, even though He is the Lion of Judah, He comes as the Lamb of God. Even when He is outwardly stern, His loving heart is always mindful that He is the “guilt offering.” Thus, Jesus not only asks the Father to forgive those who have wounded Him, but also numbers Himself with the transgressors and intercedes for them (Isa. 53:12). He does this because the Father takes “no pleasure in the death of the wicked” (Ezek. 33:11), and it is the pleasure of God that Jesus seeks. Is this not the wonder and mystery, yes, and the power, of Christ’s cross? In anguish and sorrow, wounded in heart and soul, still He offered Himself for His executioners’ sins. Without visible evidence of success, deemed a sinner and a failure before man, He courageously held true to mercy. In the depth of terrible crushing, He let love attain its most glorious perfection. He uttered the immortal words, “Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34). Christ could have escaped. As the Romans came to arrest Him, He told Peter, “Do you think that I cannot appeal to My Father, and He will at once put at My disposal more than twelve legions of angels?” (Matt. 26:53). In less than a heartbeat, the skies would have been flooded with thousands of warring angels. Yes, Jesus could have escaped, but mankind would have perished. Christ chose to go to hell for us rather than return to heaven without us. Instead of condemning mankind, He rendered “Himself as a guilt offering” (Isa. 53:10, emphasis added). He prayed the mercy prayer, “Father, forgive them” (Luke 23:34). Jesus said, “He who believes in Me, the works that I do shall he do also” (John 14:12). We assume He meant that we would work His miracles, but Jesus did not limit His definition of “works” to the miraculous. The works He did—the redemptive life, the mercy cry, the identification with sinners, rendering Himself a guilt offering—all the works He did, we will “do also.” Thus, because He lives within us, we see that Isaiah 53 does not apply exclusively to Jesus; it also becomes the blueprint for Christ in us. Indeed, was this not part of His reward, that He would see His offspring (Isa. 53:10)? Beloved, we are the progeny of Christ. Read these words from Paul’s heart: “Now I rejoice in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I do my share on behalf of His body, which is the church, in filling up what is lacking in Christ’s afflictions” (Col. 1:24). What did the apostle mean? Did not Christ fully pay mankind’s debts once and for all? Did Paul imply that we now take Jesus’ place? No, we will never take Jesus’ place. It means that Jesus has come to take our place. The Son of God manifests all the aspects of His redemptive, sacrificial life through us. Indeed, “as He is, so also are we in this world” (1 John 4:17). Paul not only identified with Christ in his personal salvation, but he was also consumed with Christ’s purpose. He wrote, “That I may know Him, and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death” (Phil. 3:10). What a wondrous reality is the “fellowship of His sufferings.” Here, in choosing to yoke our existence with Christ’s purpose, we find true friendship with Jesus. This is intimacy with Christ. The sufferings of Christ are not the sorrows typically endured by mankind. They are the afflictions of love. They bring us closer to Jesus. United with Him, we increase the pleasure of God. Father, I see You have had no higher purpose for me but to manifest through my life the nature of Your Son. I surrender to Christ, rendering myself not merely as a judge or critic, but as an offering for those who have brought wounding to my soul. May the fragrance of my worship remind You of Jesus, and may You forgive and cleanse the world around me.

Someone said that, “We’re all millionaires and don’t know it.” I read this in a book about 20 years ago. The book was about Jesus living his life as a contemporary man…and riding a Harley!* Although Joan Brady’s book does not portray a biblical view of Christ, her point is well-taken. When I reflect upon my good health, my relationships, my material blessings, the gift of God’s Spirit living in me, and so many, many blessings, which I often recount to myself at the end of the day, I am so thankful! I REALLY AM a millionaire in a spiritual sense. In one of the American Indian cultures, a person is considered rich, if they know a lot of songs. I’m rich in that way, too! I just read a book called “The Richest Man in Town,” by V.J. Smith. This short book is about an elderly cashier at Wal-Mart. The cashier’s name was Marty. Marty served about 200 customers a day, and after each transaction, Marty walked around the counter to shake the customer’s hand and to thank them for coming to Wal-Mart. Well, people started to line up at Marty’s cash register simply to receive their greeting, sometimes a hug, and always a smile. Other lines were very short while Marty’s line stretched quite a ways! V.J. Smith happened to shop at Wal-Mart and observed Marty’s acts of kindness on several occasions. Finally, V.J. wrote a letter to the president of Wal-Mart. Subsequently, Marty was one day honored by all of the employees at the local Wal-Mart. They clapped and cheered for him. Marty could hardly believe it! V.J. Smith met with Marty many times, as they became the best of friends. Because V.J. is a motivational speaker, he started to tell the story of Marty everywhere he spoke. At times Marty would accompany him on his speaking engagements. Of course, Marty would always get a standing ovation that brought him to tears. Marty taught V.J. three basic principles: Relationships matter most in life; try to do a little more; only you can make yourself happy. What solid principles these are! Of course, for many of us, our lives are centered in our relationship with God. Perhaps, that was also true for Marty. Also, our primary source of happiness is truly our relationship with God. Perhaps, that was also true for Marty and he simply “loved his neighbor as himself.” Even though Marty may have defined these important principles in life in a slightly different way than some of us would define them, Marty is a role model for us all. Marty finally received the Wal-Mart’s Hero Award at a convention where Colin Powell addressed 13,000 managers and supervisors. It was the most touching moment of Marty’s life. Marty died in 2004 and 1,000’s of people mourned his passing. In his casket, Marty wore his red Wal-Mart vest with his badge that read “Marty.” Balloons, photographs, and a poster board to sign for the benefit of Marty’s wife and children adorned Marty’s cashier station. Also, at the station, the light that indicates a station is open remained on even though Marty wasn’t there. Marty became known only because V.J. Smith wrote a letter to the president of Wal-Mart. Whether any of us ever become well known, I think Marty is an example to us all to take time for what’s important in life: loving other people. Marty was quite aware that he was rich in relationships. I think it’s important for all of us to put God and people first and realize that we can all give love, as Marty did, and “We’re all millionaires and don’t know it!” All of us can be “the richest man in town – just like Marty!” *Disclaimer: “God on a Harley,”by Joan Brady does not portray a biblical Christ, as in the “Joshua” series, by Joseph Girzone.