Last summer, our purebred chocolate lab enlivened our home with a litter of puppies. One of them captured the hearts of many visitors, both in person and online. Flash had looks and personality—and the ability to soothe the soul of whoever held him. But he remained available until we got a call. A Facebook viewer had seen photos of one of my friends holding Flash, along with her comments expressing her wish to win the lottery so she could buy him. The man on Facebook offered to buy Flash for her anonymously. My husband called her to share the news … Him: “We got a call and Flash has been bought—” She breaks in: “Aww, that’s great. He’s so awesome!” Him (with just the right inflection): “For you.” Silence. Then, sputtering and denials. “What?! Who? I can’t take him. No! That’s a $700 dog!” My husband gently explained that he was paid for, that we weren’t being denied payment, and that it wasn’t free to us but to her. Someone else had paid what Flash was worth, not for himself but on her behalf. Sitting there listening—with utter delight—to the conversation, I couldn’t help but think of my friend’s gift as an illustration of the salvation we receive as a gift from God: “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast” (Eph 2:8–9). In a society that prides itself on a system of hard work producing deserved rewards, grace doesn’t make sense. Something for nothing? Not possible. Exchanges of equal or lesser value are fine, or maybe a small, insignificant gift is alright. But something valuable? No, we must contribute to our gain because only then do we feel that we deserve it. Something for nothing can be a terrible burden on the proud. Yet we serve a God who “opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble” (1 Pet 5:5). As his followers, we need to understand that we need him. On our own, we don’t have what it takes to be saved from our sins. Only through his grace are we able to welcome salvation with open arms, joyful celebration, thanksgiving, and praise. It behooves us who belong to that group of grace-receivers to remember that God’s grace isn’t free. It is very costly—it cost Jesus his dignity, his comfort, his power, and his life. The inherent value of God’s grace makes it all the more amazing and worthy of praise. I can still hear the tone of my friend’s voice as she moved from denial to amazement. “You have got to be kidding! I get FLASH!” We were just as thrilled as she was. As we rejoiced with our friend over her gift, I thought of another passage—the celebrations Jesus describes in his parables of the lost coin, sheep, and son in Luke 15: “Just so, I tell you, there is joy before the angels of God over one sinner who repents” (v. 10). Scripture quotations are from the English Standard Version Originally published in Bible Study Magazine. http://www.biblestudymagazine.com/janfeb-2018-flash-of-grace

“May the Lord cut off all flattering lips, and the tongue that boasts!” Psalm 12:3 NET We live in a time where parents feel they have to praise everything kids do; no matter what. Whether they make a good effort, a poor effort, a mediocre effort; they get praised. It’s the mentality that everybody on the team gets a trophy. “Everybody’s a winner,” nobody loses. We live in society where kids view reward as their right. Many want to start at the top and not at the bottom. And why wouldn’t they? Just look at the world they live in…   ·       Teachers asking their students to call them by their first name. ·       Schools eliminating the honor of having a Valedictorian from graduation ceremonies. ·       High school district policies that dictate a teacher can’t give a grade less than 61% ·       Little leaguers that strike out, followed by the shrieking voice “Great at bat!” Today parents are  driven  to make sure their child is happy at every turn.  Now, let me give you just a little quick teaching on praise versus encouragement. Your child has just walked through the door with all A’s on their report card: THE PRAISING PARENT The praising parent makes their child’s happiness the all-important goal of their parenting. We really believe in America that praise is good for children. These ideas of enforcing fairness and protecting feelings grew out of the “Great self-esteem movement.” We were dooped by social do-gooders, psychologists, and self-help professionals that it was imperative for kids to  feel good  about themselves! For proper development, the child must feel good regardless of his effort or ability. While it is important for children to have a healthy self-esteem, we have praised our children into weakness. They now expect that they will always win, always receive praise, and always be rewarded for trying (vs. succeeding). When the praising parent’s child comes home with all A’s, the response may look like this,  “”Oh, we are so proud of you–you are just the best kid in the world, thank you so much for doing that!  Here’s $20 dollar bill!!” This is verbal praise combined with a financial reward.  I can hear it now… “What’s wrong with that?”  This is our society’s failed practice of assigning a dollar value to outcomes. You’re conditioning your child to choose activities that have financial reward, and developing the expectation that they SHOULD receive a financial reward when they do something they are expected to do!  Praise goes right to the actor, where encouragement goes to the act.If you want your children to feel good about themselves how about a different approach? THE ENCOURAGING PARENT The encouraging parent promotes a child’s self esteem from the inside out. So this time when little Buford walks in the door with straight A’s, the encouraging parent says, “Wow good job! It’s clear to me that you really enjoy learning. It looks like all the hard work and studying you have done this past semester has really paid off! That must make you feel real good inside!”  Do you see the difference. It’s subtle, It’s not, “Oh, what a wonderful kid you are.” It’s, “Your effort, your extra studying has really paid off.” That is the difference between praise & reward, and true parental encouragement. Your child needs that encouragement–Vitamin E if you will–and you are the best provider of it. This week look for ways that you can encourage your kids without going over the top and praising them.  So next time, when Buford strikes out…you might greet him with a simple, “Hey, rough day at the plate, eh? 0 for 3. Hey, you know, I’m going to be home early on Thursday night and Wednesday night, too. Come to think of it, if you would like me to take you down to the park and throw you some pitches, I’d be more than glad to do that, if you think that would help.” Go be an encourager.  Want to listen to me speak on this topic, click here. www.birthorderguy.com .  Used by permission.

At the age of twelve I started praying for my future husband.  In the beginning my prayers were driven by my fear that I might marry the wrong person.   Later on, though, my motives changed.  Over the next ten years I would often find myself speaking with God about critical life choices.  Prayers which started fearfully, as a desperate act of self-protection, morphed into courage and trust as I came to believe in the goodness of all God’s plans for me.   I was twenty-two when I met my husband, Gary.  After six months of marriage I attended a youth conference and found myself listening to my husband address a room full of teen-age girls.  And, then he surprised me with these words.   “When I was 12 years of age someone challenged me to start praying about who I should marry.  And so, I began seeking God’s will about my future wife.  At twelve I didn’t know I would pray this prayer for fourteen years before God led to my wife.”   “As I look at you today, I want you to know, it is not to soon to begin praying for God’s will to be established in your life.  Whatever your future may hold you want to be in the safety of God’s will.”   Amazed, I sat there.  Gary and I had never discussed at what age we started praying for each other.  Quickly I did the math.  Since Gary is four years older than me, jointly, we had prayed for our future spouses for twenty-four years.   Some prayer requests call for that kind of perseverance.   In Gary I found a bridegroom worth waiting for.   In John 3:22-30 , John the Baptist introduces Jesus to us as the bridegroom.  This picture was originally foreshadowed in the Old Testament.  Look at John 3:28-30 .  John the Baptist says,   You yourselves bear me witness, that I said, ’I am not the Christ, but I have been sent before him.’  The one who has the bride is the bridegroom.  The friend of the bridegroom, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly at the bridegroom’s voice.  Therefore this joy of mine is now complete.  He must increase, but I must decrease.   This unique portrait of Jesus is foundational to our understanding God’s long-range plans for humanity.  As we wait for Jesus’ second coming, we all need to be reminded that a good bridegroom is worth waiting for.   Why did God choose a bridegroom as a metaphor to describe Jesus?   In the Old Testament book of Hosea, an attitude of God is exposed which is quite enlightening in its scope.  The prophet reveals the God of the universe as seeing himself in a marriage relationship with the nation of Israel.  While Luke explains the Father’s heart through the story of the prodigal son, Hosea tells the story of God’s “sacred romance” through the story of a wayward wife.  In this prophecy, God equates Israel’s idolatry with adultery.  No other minor prophet exposes this metaphor quite like Hosea.   Listen to some of God’s graphic language expressed in Hosea 2:2 ,   Plead with your mother, plead – for she is not my wife, and I am not her husband – that she put away her whoring from her face and her adultery from between her breasts;        ESV   Or these compelling words from Hosea 4:12 ,   My people inquire of a piece of wood, and their walking staff gives them oracles.  For a spirit of whoredom has led them astray, and they have left their God to play the whore.   ESV   God’s heart aches for Israel like that of a jilted husband.   If we want to understand the uniqueness of the Bridegroom portrait, we must recognize God sees our idolatry as adultery.    The creator of the universe is a jealous God not because he is petty, or insecure, but because he truly loves us and knows the lies idols try to perpetrate.  They promise, but they can’t deliver ( Isaiah 44:13-16 ).  He knows our passion for them will only destroy us.  If we could grasp the bridegroom’s typology we would see how God views our reckless acts of adoration as acts of adultery.   What forms of idolatry might a Christian be tempted to run after?     I often pray for the right thing with the wrong motives.  For example, I pray, “God make me a good steward of the money you have entrusted into my care”.  But honestly, I am not looking to increase my charitable giving.  I pray this prayer most often when I am going shopping and I want to find a great bargain.   Unfortunately, even our prayers can become idolatrous.  Look at how James 4:3-5 uses some of the same vocabulary as the book of Hosea.   You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.  You adulterous people!  Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God?  Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.  Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, “He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us”?                             ESV   James is warning that we often struggle in prayer because we seek God’s intervention for the wrong reasons.  We seek more resources not to be generous or to advance Jesus’ kingdom, but to spend it on ourselves.   In the Living Bible, James 4:5b reads this way.   …The Holy Spirit, whom God has placed within us watches over us with tender jealousy…                    LB   This phrase  tender jealousy  reminds us that God’s intentions toward us are always pure and gentle.  Jesus never forces his will on us, no matter the perfection of his plans and the gifts he wants to bestow.   Words like idolatry and adultery are difficult for me to hear.  Especially when they are employed to describe my level of unfaithfulness to God.  I grieve when I think that my self-deception, and my love for the world could hurt God like this.   But God chose this language of betrayal to wake us up, not to minister hopelessness. God, who is rich in mercy, is always on our side and holds his arms open wide ready to receive us home.   Why might we desire a deeper intimacy with Jesus?      We, the bride of Christ are called to journey through life anticipating Jesus’ return ( Matt. 25:1-13 ).  And this can be difficult because God doesn’t look at perseverance the same way we do.  We need to remember that the fruit born in our wait time is highly valued by God ( Psalm 27:13-14 , Lam. 3:25-26 ).   What is God producing during your wait time?      Over forty years have passed since Gary and I said, “I do”.  I still marvel at the wisdom of God’s plan to allow me the privilege of being Gary’s wife.  Even, now as I prayerfully watch Gary go through chemotherapy, I know we have lived a blessed life.   No principle in scripture is taught with greater certainty than the second coming of Christ, and yet as Jesus lingers we still need the encouragement that a good bridegroom is worth the wait.

Questions are powerful! Ask a well-crafted question and you can open up a closed-mouthed child, build relationship, and explore the depths of your thoughts. Question-asking can also help you reflect, learn and move forward. Here are 15 Important Questions Every Grandparent Needs to Ask 1. Do I have clarity on the purpose for my grandparenting? Culture is full of powerful messages for grandparents. Messages that spotlight independence and self-indulgence. That is not, however, the message we get from the Bible. When we search its pages, we find that grandparents were created by God to play a crucial role in the spiritual development of their grandchildren. 2. Am I engaging in intentional soul care? Only take care, and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things that your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. Make them known to your children and your children’s children—   Deuteronomy 4:9   3. Do my grandchildren see by my attitudes, words, and actions that Jesus is my greatest treasure? 4. Are my conversations with my grandchildren God-saturated? 5. Has my grandchild placed faith in Jesus? 6. Is my grandchild growing spiritually? 7. What troubles, trials, or temptations is my grandchild facing? 8. What do my grandchildren believe to be true? Is the Bible shaping their worldview? Many, many children today, even those raised in Christian homes, do not know what the Bible teaches. Additionally, many are unable to explain or defend their faith. There is no question, our grandchildren are going to face strong opposition and competing belief systems. Am I helping my grandchildren base their beliefs, values, and assumptions on the Bible? 9. Does my grandparenting aim for behavior modification or heart transformation? It’s so easy to haul out a list of do’s and don’ts when we are with our grandchildren. After all, we all want to be the grandparent of the well-behaved child. However, true and lasting change doesn’t come from behavior modification. It comes through a transformation of the heart. Am I, as a grandparent, aiming for the heart? 10. Am I grandparenting in a way that helps my grandchildren grow in their love for God and love for others? And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.  38  This is the great and first commandment.  39  And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.  40  On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.”   Matthew 22:37-40 11. Do I engage in regular times of prayer for my grandchildren? 12. Do my grandchildren know my God-stories? God-stories are to be retold. When you share your stories with your grandchildren, they hear of His work and learn of His nature. Your stories are for the purpose of glorifying God and pointing your grandchildren to Him. 13. What things am I doing to show my love and my care to my family members? 14. How much time and energy am I devoting to my adult children? To my grandchildren? [T]hat you may fear the Lord your God, you and your son and your son’s son, by keeping all his statutes and his commandments, which I command you, all the days of your life, and that your days may be long.   Deuteronomy 6:2 Grandparents have been given a dual role. One that focuses on both children and grandchildren. 15. Am I helping them to get to know God? www.deborahhaddix.com .

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7 In the current political climate, many people are stressed out and may even be dreading time with relatives or friends who do not agree with their political views. Even a simple comment can go awry! It is like we are all stepping on eggshells and no conversation is safe. I want to give you several useful tips I use to navigate tricky subjects, and manage political stress and anxiety on a day-to-day basis: 1. Imagine a shield around your mind: Every time you find yourself having a stressful conversation, visualize a shield around your thoughts. Imagine the words bouncing off your mind: you are not going to absorb the weighted emotions that are threatening you. You are protected and safe. Tell yourself that you are calm and at peace. How does this process help? The way you use your conscious and nonconscious mind (that is your imagination) shifts the way the brain processes information. So, as you visualize this shield, your thinking changes, which, in turn, changes your brain waves and engages different neural pathways. This is called neuroplasticity, and mind-management is directed neuroplasticity. If you don’t manage you mind and how you react to others, you can wire damaged, toxic thoughts into your mind that not only affect how you treat people, but how you feel, mentally and physically. 2. Be curious: Ask questions! Think about what the other person is trying to say. Listen. As I often used to say to my patients, a curious mindset is crucial to navigating life and different relationships, as it encourages you to listen to different views, get as much information as possible by engaging with multiple news outlets and so on, and questioning your own assumptions. If you catch yourself saying that “so-and-so” doesn’t know what he is talking about, stop, remind yourself that everyone sees the world differently because no two minds are alike, and listen to what that person has to say before responding impulsively. You can step outside of yourself using your frontal lobe and truly hear what someone says as an observer rather than as someone who thinks “so-and-so” is an idiot. So, train yourself train yourself to really tune into what that person is saying and not just hear “trigger” words and react. For example, every time you listen to someone who has a different opinion, try see the argument from their perspective, as your teacher made you do in school when you encountered different ideas. The ability to think critically and understand different viewpoints is, after all, a sign of intelligence, not compromise. 3. Don’t let your feelings influence you: Acknowledge your feelings, but do not let them control you. In many cases, you will react because of the flight or fight response. Work through these reactions and question them. Think about your emotional triggers, so that you can avoid reacting impulsively in the future by controlling these triggers. Remember, just because we feel something doesn’t mean it’s correct, especially if it gets in the way of us focusing on the person speaking and trying to understand where they are coming from and their worldview! 4. Focus on solutions, not problems: Rather than just ruminating on the issues that are causing you distress and becoming bitter about what is being said, develop a solutions mindset. Think of ways to you can improve the situation you are in and reduce tension. Find ways you can learn from what is being discussed, even if you end up agreeing to disagree with the person in question. 5. Don’t let politics control your schedule: Limit the amount of time you spend discussing political issues, so you don’t end up ruminating on things that upset you. Choose a time and space where you focus on politics, so it doesn’t pervade the day. 6. Listen to what is being said, not who is saying it: Focus your attention on what exactly is being said—focus on the details of the speech, so you don’t demonize the person who is speaking and make it personal. Listening to a politician’s voice, or seeing a politician’s face, can have a strong emotional component because it can get stuck in your head, overriding your ability to examine what is being said in a rational and objective way. As they speak, imagine the politicians as tiny people, smaller than ants, like in the movie Honey I Shrunk the Kids. This will bring humor into the situation, which dramatically reduces anxiety and can help you listen to what they are saying in a more detached way. 7. Read and listen with a compassionate mindset: Compassion defuses the inflammatory reactions in the body that occur when we get worked up and anxious about what someone is saying, which will protect your own brain and body while helping you understand and navigate different political perspectives. Indeed, compassion can really help you recognize that most politicians are in high states of anger, anxiety and stress themselves, and often don’t say things in the best way or make the best decisions. They are human, after all! 8. Examine your own worldview: In many cases, people get upset when they feel that their worldview threatened, which happens so often in politics! It is easy to feel that your way of life is being challenged and that people disapprove of your belief system, and that this is a direct attack on you as a person, but you need to remember that everyone sees the world differently. So, take the time to objectively examine what you believe, and compare it to how other people see the world. Think deeply about what it means to have a “worldview” or “point of view”, and recognize that it normal for people to have different perspectives. You may not agree with these perspectives, but just understanding that they exist can make you more compassionate and considerate. Of course, today it is far too easy to put someone in a certain group or label them as an enemy just because you disagree with them. Rather than falling in this trap, always remind yourself that no two minds are alike. No two brains are wired in the same way, just as no two people are exactly the same! We cannot escape our differences, so we need to learn to live with them—especially when it comes to politics. www.drleaf.com. Used by permission.

It’s that time of year . Okay, truth be told, I don’ think the time of year makes any difference. Seems we all face major stress every day, all year long. But this time of year, all the shopping, planning, cooking, baking, parties, programs, and other holiday “joys” do tend to magnify our stress and anxiety. We enter the season with grand hopes of treasuring the season and enjoying the festivity. Then, BAMM! So, what can we do? Intentionality I’ve come to be a huge believer in the power of intentionality. Those things that are important to us – marriage, parenting, grandparenting, living a life centered on Christ, our health – must be approached with great intentionality. This Christmas season, the treasuring, the festivity, our mental and physical health must be approached with great intentionality. Healthy Ideas for Handling Holiday Stress Exercise There is strong scientific evidence as to the benefits of exercise in managing stress. I know you don’t think you have the time, but its benefits are HUGE and so worth it! The good news is that practically any form of exercise can relieve stress. So, find something you enjoy – walking, bicycling, running, swimming, tennis – and spend a few minutes keeping that Christmas stress at bay! (I’ve read that for stress relief 30 minutes a day, 6 days a week is ideal.) 2. Relax I know. I know. Who has time to relax? But did you know when the body and the mind are relaxed at the same time, it is impossible for us to continue to be stressed? Like light and dark, the two cannot reside in the same place. Pull away from your shopping frenzy to enjoy 15 minutes at your favorite local shop or bookstore. Enjoy an evening bubble bath. Warm yourself by a fire. Take a nap. Difficult to believe, but our bodies can be taught to relax. All it takes is some “intentionality.” 3. Feed Your Soul Biblical meditation is the most effective way to treat anxiety. This Christmas season schedule in some time to meditate on Scripture. Spend some time filling your mind with God’s Word by reading it, writing it out by hand, memorizing it, singing it, praying it. 4. Fuel Your Body Wisely Yes, there will be parties, cookies, and Christmas treats. Go ahead. Enjoy a little something now and again (unless there’s a medical diagnosis that keeps you from it). But by all means, for the sake of your stress levels (and your weight), keep your indulgences to a minimum. Rather than continual binging on sweets and carbs, begin your day with a healthy breakfast and make choices that include lots of vegetables and other healthy options. 5. Sleep We were created for sleep. In fact, all of creation sleeps. During the holidays especially, establish a sleep routine that includes a consistent bedtime and 8-9 hours of sleep. 6. Connect With Others Loneliness increases stress levels. This Christmas season live in connection. Volunteer at a local ministry or charity. Interact and share with others in ways that are meaningful. “Staying connected is a balm for your heart, your stress level, and your health.” U.S. News & World Report, February, 2009. I don’t know about you, but this year I plan to set myself up to enjoy the season and my good health by making intentional choices that will help to manage the stress that can so easily deplete me. Questions for Managing Holiday Stress Where will you schedule in some exercise and relaxation? How will you be sure to feed your soul and get your required amount of sleep? What will be your eating plan? When and in what way will you live in connection to others? www.deborahhaddix.com . Used by permission.

God created us to love people and use things, but materialists love things and use people. Materialism drives not just the “bad apples” of society; it drives “the best and the brightest,” those from the finest homes and schools, those who become government and business leaders, physicians, and attorneys. Here are two of the definitions of materialism from The Merriam-Webster Dictionary: “A doctrine that the only or the highest value or objectives lie in material well-being and in the furtherance of material progress,” and “a preoccupation with or stress upon material rather than intellectual or spiritual things.” Materialism begins with our beliefs. Not merely what we say we believe—not our doctrinal statement—but the philosophy of life by which we actually live. So even though true Christians would deny belief in the philosophical underpinnings of materialism (they couldn’t be Christians if they didn’t), they may nonetheless be preoccupied with material things. Materialism is first and foremost a matter of the heart. Beyond the examples in Scripture of many people who are warped and destroyed by greed, and its warnings against idolatry, the Bible also lists various dangers of becoming centered on money and possessions. Warning: Don’t dismiss this as negativism. On the contrary, if we understand the dangers of materialism, it will help liberate us to experience the joys of Christ-centered stewardship. What does materialism actually do to us? Here are ten answers to that question. 1. Materialism prevents or destroys our spiritual life. Jesus rebuked the Laodicean Christians because although they were materially wealthy, they were desperately poor in the things of God (Revelation3:17-18). Materialism blinds us to our own spiritual poverty. It is a fruitless attempt to find meaning outside of God. When we try to find ultimate fulfillment in a thing or a person other than Christ or a place other than Heaven, we become idolaters. According to Scripture, materialism is not only evil; it is tragic and pathetic (Jeremiah 2:11-13). Every attempt to find life in anyone or anything but God is vain. Materialism is a dead-end street. It is not only wrong—it is utterly self-destructive. 2. Materialism blinds us to the curses of wealth. John Steinbeck wrote a letter to Adlai Stevenson, which was recorded in the January 28, 1960edition of the Washington Post. Steinbeck says, “If I wanted to destroy a nation, I would give it too much, and I would have it on its knees, miserable, greedy, sick.” Scripture suggests that the possession of riches is almost always a spiritual liability (Mark10:23-25). If Jesus was serious when He said how hard it is for a rich man to enter God’s kingdom, and if being part of the kingdom of Heaven is the highest blessing a person can receive, then how can we imagine that having riches is always a blessing from God? Material prosperity can begin as God’s blessing, but when we treat it as a substitute for God, it becomes a curse. 3. Materialism brings us unhappiness and anxiety. The risk of financial resources is well illustrated by the suicides and emotional breakdowns that commonly occur during significant drops in the stock market. It’s also demonstrated in the epidemic levels of high blood pressure and hypertension among today’s “successful” professionals. Materialism is the mother of anxiety. No wonder Christ’s discourse on earthly and heavenly treasures is immediately followed by His admonitions not to worry about material things (Matthew6:25-34). Paul says that the rich should not “put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but . . . in God, who richly provides” (1 Timothy6:17). To set our heart on earthly riches not only deprives God of glory, others of help, and ourselves of reward, it also destines us to perpetual insecurity. In contrast, the one whose hope is in God will be devastated only if God fails—and He never does. 4. Materialism ends in ultimate futility. The book of Ecclesiastes is the most powerful exposé of materialism ever written. Solomon recounts his attempts to find meaning in pleasure, laughter, alcohol, folly, building projects, and the pursuit of personal interests, as well as in amassing slaves, gold and silver, singers, and a huge harem to fulfill his sexual desires (Ecclesiastes 2:1-11). He lived by this philosophy: “I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure” (Ecclesiastes 2:10). After his years as the world’s richest man, Solomon says, “When I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 2:11). Most people chase their mirages with money, but they run out of money before they run out of mirages. So they still believe the lie that “if only I had more money, then I’d be happy.” But Solomon had it all. He had more money than he could possibly spend. He ran out of mirages before he ran out of money. Consider this statement, “Whoever loves money never has money enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with his income” (Ecclesiastes 5:10). The repeated word never is emphatic—there are no exceptions. Some of life’s greatest blessings are just as available to the poor as to the rich, and often they are far more appreciated by the poor, whose lives are less cluttered and distracted by material wealth. The greatest blessing that God offers is available to all: “Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost” (Isaiah 55:1). The same invitation is repeated in the final chapter of the Bible: “Whoever is thirsty, let him come; and whoever wishes, let him take the free gift of the water of life” (Revelation22:17). The only thing worth buying cannot be bought with money. God’s Son bought us our salvation, and He freely gives Himself to all who seek Him. Money cannot buy salvation, and it cannot buy rescue from judgment. “Wealth is worthless in the day of wrath” (Proverbs 11:4). 6. Materialism spawns independence and self-sufficiency, which are deadly to faith. Why have faith in God when you have faith in yourself? Why trust God when you have all your bases covered? Why pray when you have everything under control? Why ask for your daily bread when you own the bakery? Self-sufficiency is the great enemy of faith and prayer, which are the heartbeat of the Christian life. We pride ourselves on our “financial independence,” but where would we be without God, from whom our every breath is a gift? 7. Materialism leads to pride and elitism. The Bible is full of references proving that our tendency in prosperity is to believe we deserve the credit for what we have and to grow proud and thankless (Deuteronomy 6:1-15; 31:20; 32:15-18; 2 Chronicles 26:6-16; Psalm 49:5-6; 52:7; Proverbs 30:8-9; Hosea 13:4-6). Paul asks the prideful Christians of Corinth, “For who makes you different from anyone else? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not?” (1 Corinthians 4:7). Paul tells Timothy, “Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant” (1 Timothy6:17). After all, God is the one who has given us our intellect (Daniel2:21), our abilities (Romans 12:6), and our capacity to earn money (Deuteronomy8:18). Jesus came to die for every person of every social and economic level. Paul reminds the proud Corinthians that the Church is made up of the dregs of this world (1 Corinthians1:26-31). Elitism boosts our egos by making us think we are somehow more worthy than others. Few things are more repugnant to the Lord than the rich despising the poor (Job 12:5). Yet our clubs and social circles, sometimes even our churches, foster this very attitude. 8. Materialism promotes injustice and exploitation. James condemned the rich, virtually assuming that anyone who is rich practices injustice to the poor and will come under God’s judgment as a result (James 5:1-6). The Old Testament prophets spoke out so consistently against the oppression of the poor by the rich that they left the distinct impression that a righteous rich man is rare (Isaiah 10:1-3; Jeremiah 5:27-28; 15:13; Hosea 12:8; Amos 5:11, 24; Micah 6:12). The rich man will usually be materialistic. The materialistic man will always be unjust. The wealthier the man, the greater his opportunity for injustice. Of course, the wealthy man is no more inherently sinful than the poor—he simply has more means and opportunity to subsidize and impose his sins upon others. 9. Materialism fosters immorality and the deterioration of the family. Those who enjoy prosperity, power, and privilege also commonly indulge in sexual immorality. Solomon had seen his father’s bad example. Prosperous King David, spoiled by getting everything he wanted, did not deny himself one more possession—another man’s wife (2 Samuel 11). For years studies have shown a connection between marital infidelity and an increase in income. Of course, the point is not the income itself, but the lifestyle it underwrites. A Christian can make a million dollars a year, give generously, live modestly, and avoid much of the added temptation to immorality. It’s not how much we make that matters. It’s how much we keep. A consequence of adultery is often divorce, and the consequences of divorce in the lives of children are inestimable. Even when adultery doesn’t result in divorce, it destroys the fabric of marriage and prevents the home from being a moral sanctuary from the corruption of the world. Anything that contributes to an increase in immorality, as materialism clearly does, directly contributes to the breakdown of families and the deterioration of society. 10. Materialism distracts us from our central purpose. When Jesus describes the various kinds of people who respond to the gospel, He states that some seed “fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants” (Matthew 13:7). He later explains to the disciples, “The one who received the seed that fell among the thorns is the man who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke it, making it unfruitful” (Matthew 13:22). Notice the clear relationship between wealth and worry. Like the circus plate spinner who runs frantically from one plate to the next, quickly spinning each one again before it can fall and crash, many of us center our lives around possessions, concerns, and activities that demand our constant attention and thereby draw attention away from what God has called us to be and do. Let’s Not Fail to Prepare for the Life Ahead After striking a large deposit of gold, two miners in the Klondike gold rush were so excited about unearthing more and more gold each day that they neglected to store up provisions for the winter. Then came the first blizzard. Nearly frozen, one of the miners scribbled a note explaining their foolishness. Then he lay down to die, having come to his senses too late. Months later, a prospecting party discovered the note and the miners’ frozen bodies lying on top of a huge pile of gold. Obsessed with their treasure, these men hadn’t taken into account that the fair weather wouldn’t last and winter was coming. Hypnotized by their wealth, they failed to prepare for the imminent future. The gold that seemed such a blessing proved to be a deadly curse. Dazzled by riches and the prospect of having more, materialists live out their life on earth as if this were all there is. They fail to prepare for the long life ahead. One day, sooner than expected, materialists will find out they were wrong. They will discover the truth that all the wealth in the world can do nothing for them. If they don’t make that discovery until they die, it will be too late to go back and change the way they lived. The good news is, God gave us His Word so we don’t have to wait until we die to discover how we should have lived. That’s why in order to break free from the tyranny of materialism, we desperately need to read the Scriptures, to grapple with these issues, bring them to God in prayer, discuss them with our brothers and sisters, and look for and learn from those rare models of nonmaterialistic living in our Christian communities. Excerpted from Randy’s book Money, Possessions, and Eternity. See also his books The Treasure Principle, Managing God’s Money, and Giving Is the Good Life. epm.org . Used by permission.

We don’t want the changed life, we want the exchanged life. For this God has given us His Holy Spirit. The Christian life becomes practical through the life and ministry of the Holy Spirit. Condemnation is dispelled. God’s grace is assured.

Have you ever made a decision you knew deep down wasn’t right, but it seemed completely justifiable in your situation? Maybe you’ve been lonely in your marriage for a really long time, so it seems understandable that you’d seek companionship from a man who isn’t your husband. Or, you know you need to stick to the budget you and your spouse agreed on, but those boots are just too cute to pass up. Or, you realize what you overheard at work was confidential, but surely it won’t hurt if you just tell one other co-worker. We justify and rationalize our actions until one day, our reckless choices slam into our lives like a wrecking ball. We forget that sin unleashes consequences that rob us of our peace, diminish our integrity and cause us pain that’s never worth it. If only we could see from the outset what the choice of sin will do to us. That’s why I wish every temptation had a warning label on it. Then we’d know exactly what we were getting ourselves into. Our warning label might look like this if we’re tempted to overspend: “You will begin to look at other people’s lives and see all the shiny new things they have. It will start off as a small seed of jealousy that will grow until you rationalize you deserve those things, too. You will make an extra purchase online and bend the monthly budget just a smidge. But it won’t stop there. Sin and secrecy have ravenous appetites. Before you know it, you’ll be hiding credit card bills from your husband, being dishonest in your relationships, and facing a growing amount of debt. Your seemingly small decisions today will not only affect you, but they’ll ultimately lead to the division and possibly destruction of your family and the peace you took for granted.” Or maybe we’re tempted to gossip, and our warning label would say this: “You will convince yourself it’s okay to share one juicy detail about someone with a friend, as long as you follow it up with, ‘But don’t tell anyone.’ Each time you divulge a secret that isn’t yours to tell, you’ll feel a little more accepted by the captive audience. It will feel good to be the one who knows it all. But this house of cards will quickly come crashing down as friends and family lose their trust in you. You will no longer be known as a person of integrity or credibility. Relationships will disintegrate. And the words once whispered by you about others will make their return voyage as you eventually become the one being gossiped about.” Take a second to think about this. What would the warning label in your life say? The truth is, those warning labels are already all throughout the Bible. For example, James 1:13; 16; 21-22 tells us: “When tempted, no one should say, ‘God is tempting me.’ For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.” “Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters.” … “Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.” “Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.” But, if my Bible is collecting dust and my conscience is being hushed, then my heart is in danger of being crushed. That’s not a sing-song rhyme. That’s truth. Temptation only works if our enemy keeps the consequences hidden from us. The enemy is thrilled when we don’t open our Bibles. He wants us to think the Bible is too complicated to understand and too difficult to live out. This is nothing more than an evil marketing plan crafted in the depths of hell to sell you something you don’t have to buy. Your mind was made by God; therefore, your brain is perfectly capable of receiving what it needs to receive from the warning labels God has provided in His Word. And even if your brain doesn’t understand some things, your soul is made by God to respond to Truth. You don’t have to be a scholar. You just have to be created by God. And you are. Therefore, you can receive God’s Word, and His Word will achieve all the wonderful purposes meant for you. Remember, Satan knows how powerful God’s Word is, and he wants to keep us from it. Let’s refuse to let him. Father God, I don’t want to be easily influenced by the enemy’s lies or seduced by his crafty plans. I want to live this life free of his entanglements. Guide me and teach me each day as I sit and read Your Truth, preparing my heart and mind for battle. In Jesus’ Name, Amen. Originally posted  HERE.

Sarah is my favorite woman in the Bible. Flawed but faithful, she inspires me to finish my race well. Although I stumble and struggle along the way, I know I will enter heaven and hear Jesus say, “Well done, good and faithful servant!” If Sarah can be included in the Hall of Faithful Heroes, you and I can, too. In Sarah’s story, I see a divine resemblance to my own. Maybe you do, too. Sarai Journeyed Bravely into the Unknown Sarai (whose name meant Princess, and was later changed by God to ‘Sarah’ which meant ‘mother of nations’) was the daughter of a wealthy Chaldean tribesman named Terah. She married Abram, her half-brother. This gorgeous Bedouin debutante had no idea she was in for such a wild ride when she married this man! Sarai left her family, her wealth and position to follow her crazy husband to “a land God would show him.” (1,426 miles) She willingly obeyed. She was spunky. I don’t know how I’d respond if my hubby packed a U-Haul, declared he was uprooting me to go to a strange land he knew nothing about… to do God knows what…Oh, wait, he did! It was the best decision of our lives. My husband, Roger, answered God’s call to preach in an unchurched desert town 1,000 miles away from our friends and family. But Sarai was even more brave. She didn’t even know where the U-Camel was going! Sarai’s Test of Trust and Submission The journey to this new home was difficult for Sarai. Searing heat and famine almost destroyed their brood. Abram and his entourage took a detour to pagan Egypt. It was a risky move for any nomad (Genesis 12:10). Sarai’s next test was to lie for Abram to Pharaoh. She was gorgeous. Abram willingly offered Sarai to the powerful Egyptian ruler because he knew Sarai was beautiful and he feared Pharaoh would want her as his wife. Sarai obeyed Abram, though she shook in her sandals and hid in Pharaoh’s harem. She trusted God even when her husband didn’t protect her. By the way, her spouse gave Sarai to King Abimelech later for the same reason (Genesis 20)! Maybe she had plastic surgery? At any rate, she was older and still considered quite gorgeous. Some theologians say the Egyptian harem is where Sarai first encountered God for herself. God sent a plague on Pharaoh’s house and Sarai was returned to her husband with riches and livestock in tow. Roger never shipped me off to a stranger. He was brave in the face of deacons and demons. But I was not so courageous. If you don’t know this, pastor’s wives are at the mercy of their husbands. Every word from the pulpit carries weight. Every decision could change the future. And every church member had an opinion about what our family did or didn’t do! Sarai trusted God in a tough situation. I applaud her. And so did Peter: …for this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. – 1 Peter 3:5-6 Sarai’s Test of Patience Sarai, like all of us, often faltered in her faith. God promised to make Abram the “father of many nations” (Gen. 17:4) but she was barren. So, like most conniving (or desperate) women, Sarai went into “fix-it” mode and gave Abram her maidservant Hagar to produce a son. It was a lousy practice, but it was customary in her society. Sarai grew impatient and ran ahead of God. Let’s try to put ourselves in poor Sarai’s shoes. Dr. Julia Blum writes, “What a horrible disappointment! What a terrible moment to arrive at! All these years, the echo of His magnificent promises kept Sarai through the hunger, the endless wandering, the Egyptian humiliation, and those sharp pangs of loneliness that would seize her whole being whenever she thought of what she had left behind to follow her husband. Sarah was able to go through all of that because she firmly believed that someday she would give birth to a son, and then finally, everything that God promised would start to be fulfilled. After all, God promised her husband: “I will make you a great nation, I will bless you, and make your name great, and you shall be a blessing.” He promised: “And I will make your descendants as the dust of the earth; so that if a man could number the dust of the earth, then your descendants also could be numbered.” (Genesis 17:4) Didn’t that mean that she, Sarah, would give birth to a son who would become a father of this multitude of descendants? Abram’s wife waited for an unfulfilled promise for decades. Had God forgotten her? She went through the mood swings and hot flashes of menopause with nary a sign of morning sickness. Abram, her husband had heard God speak, but Sarai had to trust her husband’s divine revelations. Like All of Us, Sarah Endured Suffering Roger and I waited a long time for God to fulfill His promise to us. Our church site was too small. We were holding five services and further growth was impossible. Roger had God’s vision to relocate from our current site to a 100-acre parcel of land five miles north of our current church site. The move and the buildings would cost millions and supposedly take two years to complete. Cost overruns plagued the project. Instead of taking two years to finish the project, it took twelve. Three ulcers and two heart attacks later, my husband entered the doors of the sanctuary to preach for the first time. We were not spiritual giants like Abraham and Sarah, but we camped in the scorching desert for more than a decade, and the wait was agonizing. I’m still impatient. When God doesn’t work as quickly as I expect, I run ahead of Him. Instead of letting my kids grow up and make their own choices, I continually rush to advise them or bail them out. I don’t relinquish control and allow them to be adults. Sarai suffered, waiting and waiting for this “child of promise.” I try to wiggle out of the trials and suffering God uses to mature my faith. Pastor Craig Groeschel calls such actions “Christian atheism,” because Christians often live their lives as if God doesn’t exist. God is not small, simple or shortsighted. He is eternal, all-powerful, and omniscient. And we are not. My husband Roger often describes the hard journey of spiritual growth in this way: “It takes a hundred years to grow a mighty oak. He can turn out a squash in six weeks. Which do you want to be?” Sarah eventually grew to be a mighty oak. Sarah Became Angry Can you imagine going through the mood swings and hot flashes of menopause, knowing God had promised her a baby? How frustrated Sarai must have been! But God didn’t reject her for her wavering faith. She still is mentioned in Hebrews 11, the Hall of Faithful Ones. Hagar, Sarai’s maidservant, flaunted her rotund baby belly and belittled her mistress. Sarai, filled with jealousy and rage, cruelly threw her out of the family tent, much to Abram’s dismay. She didn’t trust God to give her a son. (Genesis 16) Sarai’s impatience caused tension between her son and Hagar’s son Ishmael for 4,000 years. What a cat fight those two women must have had! I don’t tend to anger easily. I just stuff my feelings and let them emerge as “thinly disguised contempt.” Sarcasm and acerbic humor take the place of confrontation. But the results are still the same. Someone always gets hurt, and my sin distances us from God and others. Sarah’s Reward However, this is not the end of Sarai’s story. God did give Abram and Sarai a baby. In our world, that would be two wrinkled senior citizens becoming new parents just as they qualified for Medicare. Isaac, their son, means “Laughter.” And God really does have a sense of humor. And He keeps His promises! Though she may have previously laughed in disbelief and secrecy, now Sarah laughed with joy and wanted her situation to be known: God had been faithful to His promise and blessed her. (Genesis 21:6-7) I never thought I’d have another baby. My first little girl died a long, agonizing death. The docs told me it would be risky to try to have another child. But God miraculously gave our family two daughters, Brianna (Gift of God) and Bronwyn (Pure Heart). We even had holy puppies! Goody (Goodness) and Surely (Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life). We never got around to adopting Mercy, but I foresee a “Mercy” mutt in our future. Abram’s Test of Faith One test still remained for the couple. God tested Abraham’s faith by asking him to sacrifice his promised son, Isaac. Abraham was willing to give up his son, trusting that God would somehow still remain true to His promise (Genesis 22; Hebrews 11:17–19). The Bible never says that Sarah was aware of Abraham’s command to sacrifice her son. But Abraham’s moments on Mount Moriah foreshadowed God’s sacrifice of His only Son, Jesus. God’s Renames Abram and Sarai God only gave a few sacramental names-names that were given in association with His covenant declaration. God re-named Abram. Abram, “Exalted Father,” became Abraham, “Father of Many Nations.” Sarai, “Princess,” became Sarah, meaning “Mother of Many Nations.” (Genesis 17) Paul writes that Abraham and Sarah began a lineage that continued through all who believe in Jesus, the Messiah: The Jews, the people of Israel-theirs is the adoption to sonship; theirs the divine glory, the covenants, the receiving of the law, the temple worship and the promises. Theirs are the patriarchs, and from them is traced the human ancestry of the Messiah, who is God over all, forever praised! However, it is the children of the promise who are regarded as Abraham’s offspring. For this was how the promise was stated: “At the appointed time I will return, and Sarah will have a son. – Romans 9:4-9 As Christians, Jesus has given you and I new names, too. I, Julie Gail (Windy July), and you, became “Beloved Child of the King.” We can’t even imagine what God will do through us if we trust His promises and wait for Him to work! And by faith even Sarah, who was past childbearing age, was enabled to bear children because she considered him faithful who had made the promise. – Hebrews 11:11 The key to Sarah’s success was that she considered God faithful, even when she was not. You and I can hope in a faithful God in our frailty. What a promise!

Sexual Freedom = Happiness? Gen Z (also known as iGen), are currently between the ages of 6 and 24 years old. These youth have been influenced by society to view sex, sexuality, and now even gender identity, as critical aspects of their personal “happiness.” There are so many directions we could take in this post, but let’s ask a single question, “Does sexual freedom actually make us happy?” If sexual exploration and experimentation are so “affirming,” why does Gen Z admit it feels incredibly lonely, lost, depressed, and stressed out? Wait, sex isn’t making life better? A study from 2000 found that teens viewed  143 incidents of sexual behavior  on network television during prime time viewing hours  each week  — with little of it morally affirming. How, after 20 years of this messaging, might we demonstrate that we have “come a long way”? Perhaps this popular Google search term —  “Become Sexually Irresistible” —  could be one measure. If sexual freedom, as society suggests, is the yellow brick road to empowerment and good vibes, shouldn’t we find Gen Z creating their best lives as they curiously explore? Sexual Freedom = Bondage? Research statistics confirm that, for many, sexual curiosity and engagement has led to significant pain and bondage: Studies show that one in seven teens are actively  sexting , sharing sexual content and photos via texts, social platforms, secret chat rooms, and live-streaming websites. Many then experience the nightmare of being controlled, bullied, and sexually trafficked from “ sextortion .”  When our teens (and even pre-teens) believe they need to sexualize their bodies, it should “wake” us to the fact that they’re desperately seeking validation where society has placed value.   Society champions the  porn  industry, asserting that viewing porn is “normal, harmless, and fun.” For many, it’s the start of a spiraling addiction. 64 percent of young people between 13-24 admit they regularly view porn, and many find they can’t stop. Many also admit the addiction makes it impossible for them to interact in real relationships in healthy patterns.  Healthy relationships are a necessity for a healthy society. Per the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), 20 million new cases of  sexually transmitted diseases  infect Americans each year, with half of the infected between 15 and 24 years old. In one U.S. survey, 24 percent of teenage girls tested were found to have an  STI . Sexual infection rates across the U.S. indicates the  upward trend  isn’t slowing down. As half of the eight most common sexually transmitted diseases aren’t curable with available drugs, infections are easily shared with each new sexual partner.  Will every sexually active person become infected? Gen Z has been raised in a world that promotes sexual “empowerment.” Many find the promised “liberation” actually comes with chains. Rethinking Sex  There are many good reasons that God asks us to live to His standards. Though Gen Z might assert that being asked to curb their sexual exploration and experimentation limits their personal choice and freedom, we can help Gen Z to: Compare media messaging about sex with how it’s playing out in real life among their peers.Get clear on the personal safety and control they give up when they sext and participate in sexual activity. This downloadable  Sexting Handbook  link by The Common Sense Media is a helpful resource. Embrace what God says about their bodies, including their worth having nothing to do with their sex appeal. Do you know a young person who could benefit from your loving wisdom and God’s ceaseless love?  Let’s help to connect our Gen Z friends with churches and groups that will guide them in building empowering lives they will fully enjoy. Our own Resolution Movement , as well as these  organizations , focus on helping youth to break the chains of unhealthy sexual habits, addiction, and shame. Let’s help Gen Z to live in the freedom God wants them to enjoy! One’s sexuality is an important part of life, for sure. But sex was meant to be sacred. When it’s not, it leads to bondage. There’s no liberation in that. www.josh.org .

When we feel anger, our emotions tell us it’s 100 percent someone else’s fault. But James, the brother of Jesus, has something different to say. When we take a step back and acknowledge what the problem really is, anger will no longer be the boss of us. Preached at North Point Community Church. www.sermonslove.com .