Dear Roger, I see temptations, trials, and testing in the Bible. Are they different? How does God use them in our lives? Sincerely, Mike Dear Mike, Solve the following puzzle: You are running away from home. You make three left turns and return home. Who are the two masked men standing there? (The answer is below. Give it your best shot, and then come on back here.) My point is, when taking tests, we need to pay attention. It’s easy to get distracted and miss the obvious. It’s the same thing when we deal with God in the areas of temptations, trials, and tests. We don’t want to get distracted. Too much is at stake! By the way, if you said “the catcher and the umpire,” you would be correct. TEMPTATIONS Let’s start with temptations. The purpose of temptation is to bring out the worst in us … and for us to learn to overcome. Fortunately, God is our partner; He promises to bring us victory in the midst of our temptations — if we so choose. “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.” (1 Corinthians 10:13) How we handle our temptations is a good indicator of our level of spiritual development. And it helps to come up with a plan… James penned some good words for us. “When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone;  14  but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.” (James 1:13-14) For example, I'm thinking of how many men struggle with lust. I found that a good coping mechanism when we are tempted to lust after a beautiful woman is to immediately pray for her rather than lust for her. Remember, we cannot keep the birds from flying overhead; but, we certainly can keep them from nesting in our hair. James penned some good words for us. “When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone;  14  but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.” (James 1:13-14) TRIALS The purpose of trials is to refine our lives and leave us with a purer, stronger faith, as well as a character that God can bless and use. “These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed”. (1 Peter 1:7) The result of trials is that, over time, we begin to look more and more like Jesus. “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son.” (Romans 8:28-29) Trials are painful and difficult by nature. But how we handle them makes all the difference. We live in a fallen, broken world where hurricanes come, earthquakes occur. God is credited for things with which he had nothing to do. Insurance companies call these things, “Acts of God.” Sometimes things just happen in the natural order of events. Jesus said that “The rain falls on the just and the unjust alike.” Trials can come from our own mistakes and errors. Through neglect, inattention, and selfishness King David ruined his entire family. He had at least seven marriages and destroyed them all. He ruined every child he ever had – they struggled with neglect, incest, murder, rape and rebellion. Tragically, it was his fault! David failed to handle his trials with character and strength. But don’t forget, God still called him “the man after His own heart.” God still loved him dearly. I was speaking at summer camp on how God designs—or allows—trials for the purpose of making us like Jesus. In the tabernacle after one of the services, a woman was weeping. Her husband said to me, “She is angry at everything you are saying.” Finally, she opened up enough to tell me her story. She accidentally backed her car over her three-year-old daughter. Her daughter died in her arms with a crushed chest in less than three minutes. Her last words were, “Mommy, why did you do this?” She glared at me. Are you telling me that “God is sufficient for this? Are you trying to tell me God let this happen on purpose?” I wanted to say, “But, this wasn’t God’s doing, you did it.” But, of course, I didn’t say that. I wanted to say, “As tragic as this is, Jesus can even use this to mature you to look more like Him.” I didn’t say any of that. This was not the time for a theological discussion. So, I did my best to comfort her in her trial. Paul’s thorn—his greatest trial—originated with Satan. Three times he begged God for relief; unfortunately, God said, “No.” Why? God told Paul that his trials were meant to keep him humble. Hebrews 12 reveals the proper response to trials (three don’ts and one do): Don’t get bitter; Don’t get angry at God; Don’t lose heart; Do submit to God’s will, remember His love, and live. Consider Peter. He began his journey with Jesus as a fisherman. He denied Jesus three times. Then when Jesus told him to wait in Jerusalem, instead he went back to fishing. But as he grew and matured in Christ—fighting through his trials—he developed into the shepherd of God’s church (John 21). TESTS God is the source of all tests. Nevertheless, please note that tests and trials may look a lot alike. The purpose of a test is so that both we and God learn whether or not we can assimilate and apply the lessons of living a godly life. When God said, “Go sacrifice your son,” it was not the first time Abraham’s faith was tested. God didn’t begin with “Go slay your boy”. He started with, “Why don’t you find a new house” and built from there. The home test: “Go to a land that I will show you.” Passed. The famine test: Abraham arrived in the in Promised Land during a famine. Instead of staying there, he panicked and went to Egypt: Failed. The flock test: Abraham offered the best pasture to his nephew, Lot. God honored his decision. Passed. The fortune test: The king of Sodom offered to make Abraham rich. He rejected the offer:. Passed. The family test: Abraham tried to fulfill God’s promise of descendants in his own earthly way, leading to tragic problems among Sarah, Hagar, and Ishmael. Failed. The Isaac test: Go sacrifice your son Isaac. Isaac was no child; he was most likely early in his twenties. Imagine the pain Abraham endured. On the way to Mount Moriah, Isaac asked his dad, “We have the wood, fire, and the knife. Where is the lamb?” What carried Abraham through this test? He’d learned that faith in God’s promise mattered. He trusted God that in Isaac he would have many descendants. Abraham was planning on a resurrection. Hebrews 11:19 tells us: “He calculated that God could bring life out of death.”  When Abraham raised the knife, he passed the test. God provided a ram and foreshadowed Jesus the lamb dying in our place on the cross. Look at your life. You’ll recognize all sorts of interactive tests where God is evaluating how well you are growing to maturity in Christ. Are you responding to tests by learning the teachings of the Scriptures and the promptings of the Holy Spirit? The ultimate test: Will you follow Christ at any price? Mike, I hope this answer is helpful to you. Sincerely, Roger ** You are running away from home. You make three left turns and return home. Who are the two masked men standing there? ANSWER: The umpire and catcher

"You will know the truth and the truth will set you free." - Jesus Christ 1. Existing fetal homicide laws make a man guilty of manslaughter if he kills the baby in a mother's womb (except in the case of abortion). 2. Fetal surgery is performed on babies in the womb to save them while another child the same age is being legally destroyed. 3. Babies can sometimes survive on their own at 23 or 24 weeks, but abortion is legal beyond this limit. 4. Living on its own is not the criterion of human personhood, as we know from the use of respirators and dialysis. 5. Size is irrelevant to human personhood, as we know from the difference between a one-week-old and a six-year-old. 6. Developed reasoning powers are not the criterion of personhood, as we know from the capacities of three-month-old babies. 7. Infants in the womb are human beings scientifically by virtue of their genetic make up. 8. Ultrasound has given a stunning window on the womb that shows the unborn at eight weeks sucking his thumb, recoiling from pricking, responding to sound. All the organs are present, the brain is functioning, the heart is pumping, the liver is making blood cells, the kidneys are cleaning fluids, and there is a fingerprint. Virtually all abortions happen later than this date. 9. Justice dictates that when two legitimate rights conflict, the limitation of rights that does the least harm is the most just. Bearing a child for adoption does less harm than killing him. 10. Justice dictates that when either of two people must be inconvenienced or hurt to alleviate their united predicament, the one who bore the greater responsibility for the predicament should bear more of the inconvenience or hurt to alleviate it. 11. Justice dictates that a person may not coerce harm on another person by threatening voluntary harm on themselves. 12. The outcast and the disadvantaged and exploited are to be cared for in a special way, especially those with no voice of their own. 13. What is happening in the womb is the unique person-nurturing work of God, who alone has the right to give and take life. 14. There are countless clinics that offer life and hope to both mother and child (and father and parents), with care of every kind lovingly provided by people who will meet every need they can. 15.Jesus Christ can forgive all sins, and will give all who trusts him the help they need to do everything that life requires. www.desiringgod.org.

Dear Roger, We sang "Jesus Loves Me" at the close of our worship time this Sunday. It reminded me of Karl Barth's comment when asked what was the deepest, most profound truth he'd discovered in all his years of following and learning about Jesus. This world renowned Swiss theologian replied, "Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so. Driving home from church I asked my children what was their favorite verse in all the Bible? All three quoted John 3:16: "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son that whosoever believes in Him would not perish but have everlasting life." Later that afternoon I began thinking about which Bible passage gives the most beautiful picture of Jesus in all the Bible. Of course, I thought of many. I'd like to know what you think is the most beautiful picture of Jesus in all the Bible?" Sincerely, Dawn Dear Dawn, I don't have to think twice about my favorite. I love Jesus as He is pictured in Hebrews 12:1-3: "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." I have many favorite pictures as He is portrayed in the Scriptures. Jesus' favorite description of Himself was "Son of Man." I like the humanity of that but it is not my favorite. Next to Son of Man, He liked to call Himself a shepherd. I like that picture. Psalm 22 is called the Psalm of the Cross. David pictured how the crucifixion looked from Jesus point of view as He hung on the cross. Isaiah pictured what Jesus looked like hanging on the cross from peoples' point of view. Both are tragic pictures; but, they are beautiful as they both show us Christ's work of our salvation. Only once in all the Bible does Jesus give us an inside picture of His character. He described Himself as "gentle and humble in heart." "Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls" (Matthew 11:29). I like that. I intend to answer your question by commenting on these three verses. In my mind, no more beautiful picture of Jesus can be found anywhere in the Bible. HEBREWS 12:1: "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us." The Christian life is an endurance race: The “Door of Salvation” is the starting line and “Christlikeness” is the finish line. “The sin that so easily entangles is the translation for the Greek word, "weight. The sin that weighs us down is Unbelief! Lack of Faith In the Christian life, any extra-weight-encumbered person who puts on the overcoat of unbelief will eventually collapse in the middle of the track. The way we win the race is to keep looking intently at Jesus HEBREWS 12:2: Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Jesus is the one who planned (author) and completed (perfecter) our salvation. The word "perfecter" is the Greek word ("teleios"). This word means that Jesus carried out exactly what He needed to do in saving us. He did it perfectly. I am reminded of Proverb 15:30: “Bright eyes gladden the heart”. Studies show that hormones are actually released into our bloodstream that cause our irises to dilate when we come into contact with people we like. “Brighten my day!” In one study a number of college men were given ten pictures of equally attractive college-aged women. Each student was asked to rate the pictures from “most attractive” to “least attractive”. What these men didn’t know was that five of the women had been given an eye-drop solution just before their picture was taken which dilated the pupils in their eyes. The girls with “bright eyes” were chosen hands down as the five most attractive women in the pictures! We look intently at Jesus to stay on track as we follow the twists and turns of the Christian race course. A line about Jesus in verse two makes for me this picture of Jesus more beautiful than any other in the Bible: "For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. He approached the cross with joy at the thought of saving us. To get through to the joy He had to endure much shame. The most shameful moment of my life was when Mrs. Horne the seventh grade history teacher stood behind me and asked the kids why Roger had so much acne. Heat rose up from my hot, rosy red cheeks. I heard one girl say, "It is probably because he doesn't wash his face enough." Several others offered their opinions. The most shameful moment of my life occurred in the far left row, third seat from the front in that seventh grade classroom. Fifty-two years have passed since that Friday, and the shame, moment and Mrs. Horne are still as real to me as if they happened yesterday. Of course, after all these years I have finally forgiven Mrs. Horne--the old hag. Let's consider for a moment the shame Jesus endured. THE SHAMEFUL REJECTION Luke 4:28-30: "He came to his own to his hometown; but they received Him not. In fact, they tried to kill Him." THE SHAMEFUL ACCUSATION They brought Him before the Priests, Annas and Caiaphas, and charged Him with blasphemy (Mark 14:56-64). They charged Him claiming to be God—He was God! Charge some of us with blaspheming God and some of us have done it. But to charge one who loved like Jesus Christ loved, obeyed as He obeyed, to charge Him with blasphemy must have caused him peculiar shame and suffering. THEY Mocked His Kingship. Pilate asked, “Are you a king?” Here stands the King of all creation, and He humbled Himself: “As a lamb before his shearers is dumb, so He opened not his mouth.” He was scourged. THEY MOCKED HIS DEITY. He was dragged before King Herod “Do us some tricks to prove that you are God,” mocked Herod, “and we’ll let you go free.” They stripped Him and blindfolded Him. Began to poke the Son of God with sticks. “Prophesy, who struck you?” So what do they do to the King? The soldiers brought Him robes and bowed down to worship the King of Kings? No. Not at all. They crammed a crown of thorns on Him and spit on Him. THEY MOCKED HIS PRAYERS. Never do we read in the annals of execution that anyone mocks the prayers of a dying man. “Give me a minute or two to pray.” “Well, of course.” Look at Jesus. Every prayer is an object of jest. “Eloi, Eloi, lama sabacthani… My God, My God, why hast Thou forsaken me?” They make a pun. “He calls for Elijah! Let’s see if Elijah will come and rescue Him!” (Mark 15:33-37). HE SUFFERED THE SHAME OF THE CROSS. Men have devised many horrible ways to kill over the years… guillotines, gas chambers, electric chairs, mustard gas, nuclear weapons, hanging… the rack; but, I suppose nothing is more shameful than the cross. Stripped naked, hanging in excruciating pain. The cross was reserved for the most criminal of criminals. MEDICALLY AND SPIRITUALLY JESUS DIED OF A BROKEN HEART. Don’t you know that His tender heart bled as he was put to death by the very ones he had come to save! This was His world. These were His men; His nails; His cross—and they did not recognize him (John 1:10-11). His head fell on His chest. They said, “He’ll never lift that head among the multitudes again!” "They said, "Look at those nails… hands. Those were the hands which healed, that raised the dead, touched lips, made mud and opened blind eyes, lifted against the winds to calm the storm. He will never use those hands again.!" HIS DEATH WAS SIGNIFICANT LIKE NONE OTHER. His death (and subsequent resurrection) was a divine transaction to forgive the sins of the entire world (John 1:12 HE FOUND THE PROMISED JOY. Why endure all the shame? Why? Why? Because He could see the joy on the other side of the cross. Joy of saving us. He made it perfectly. Philippians 2 reminds us that one day, at the name of Jesus, every knee shall bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” I imagine that He is really going to enjoy that moment. On Christmas Eve, 1968 the Apollo Eight astronauts read the Genesis chapter one creation story as they orbited the moon. When the cameras were turned off in space and the program was over, Paul Harvey came on one of the Dallas TV channels and told about a New England preacher who bought a cage which held two old cow birds. The preacher saw a young boy with caged birds and asked, "What do you have there?" The boy replied, "I have two cowbirds in this bird cage." "What are you going to do with them?" asked the preacher. "Well, I haven't thought about it much. I suppose that I will play with them, poke sticks at them, maybe shake them around in the cage," said the boy. "You know that you will get tired of playing with them, then what will you do with them?" "Oh, I have an old cat, she loves cow birds. I'll feed them to her." "How much for the two birds and the cage?" asked the pastor. "Oh, mister, you don't want these cow birds. They aren't worth anything. All they do is eat some old insects and bugs off of the backs of cows." "How much?" asked the preacher. "Fifty cents." "Let me have the cage." The pastor took the cage into a back alley, opened the cage door and coaxed the birds to freedom. One day Jesus met Satan carrying a bird cage. "What do you have in the cage?" asked Jesus. "Just some worthless human beings," said Satan. "What are you going to do with them," asked Jesus. Satan replied, "I thought that I would play with them for a while. You know, murder, divorce, slavery, war." "You will one day get tired of playing with them. What will you do with them then?" "They are worthless creatures. I know. I'll damn them all to Hell." Jesus asked, "How much?" "You don’t want them. They'll spit on you, mock you, reject you. You don't want them. "How much for the humans in the cage?" "Nothing less than your blood on the cross." Jesus said, "Let me have the cage." "Jesus LOVES ME THIS I KNOW, FOR THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO." Thanks, Dawn, for the great question. I hope that I have expanded your pictures of the Lord Jesus Christ. Love, Roger

Dear Roger, I was reading about the Great Commandment in Matthew 22. Jesus said that we are to love God with all our heart soul and mind. Jesus said that we are to love our neighbors as ourselves. I got to thinking, “This must be very difficult for some.” I’ve discovered that a lot of people don’t love themselves well. It must be hard to love your neighbor as yourself when you don’t love yourself very well. What do you think about that? Sincerely, Sarah. Dear Sarah, Maybe Jesus should have said, “Love your neighbor better than you love yourself.” I came across a study by the American Health Organization that commissioned a Gallup survey about self image: “If you could change anything about yourself, what would it be?” They discovered that women would like a dress size two to four times smaller. They would like to be one inch taller; weigh 11 pounds less; have good muscle tone; curly brown hair and a bronzed suntanned look. Forty-eight percent would cover aging symptoms; 37% would fix their teeth; 34% desire better legs; 18% desire smaller feet. What would men change? Absolutely nothing! Men like themselves just the way they are! Just kidding! The average man would like to be one inch taller; weigh several pounds lighter; and be more muscular. Men want hairy chests because they think that women like men with hairy chests—and men are right! Twenty-eight percent would ask for less aging signs. Nineteen percent desire a smaller nose. Gallup concluded that men are either more naturally contented or more naturally slobs! Just kidding! But, you get the idea. Sarah, I’d like to answer your question by using material from one of my favorite books, “Telling Yourself The Truth.” I’m also intertwining my answer with materials and personal experiences from Dr. Steve Dowdle; Brianna Wetherbee; Julie Barrier and myself. THE GREATEST COMMANDMENT Matthew 22:34-39: "Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself.” Unfortunately, many of us have a problem. We have trouble even liking ourselves. If we don’t like ourselves, then it is rather difficult to love our neighbor as we love ourselves. Loving ourselves better means improving our self-image in a way that increases self-esteem. We know better than to attack our neighbors with words like:  "You are not pretty . . . You are fat . . . stupid . . . no good . . . defective . . . I have my mother's thighs!" Why would we treat ourselves like this? It depends on whether we have a good self image or a poor one. WHAT IS A SELF-IMAGE? Our self-image is the picture we have in our minds of ourselves. Our idealized-self is what we think we ought to be. Our self-esteem is how we feel about ourselves: good or bad. In 1 Corinthians 15:10 Paul had all three concepts in mind when he wrote : “By the grace of God I am what I am.” WHERE DOES OUR SELF-IMAGE COME FROM? Our self-image is developed mainly from the images of ourselves which are reflected back to us by other people, our culture, and our God! 1 Corinthians 13:12: Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. The house of mirrors at the amusement park makes twisted images of ourselves.  Some mirrors reflect us tall and skinny, short and fat, curved, all sorts of combinations. My father mirrored back to me a great sense of worth: “Roger, you can succeed at anything you try. I see you loving people, building relationships and working hard. I am so proud of you.” On the other hand, too often mirrors reflect to us poor images of ourselves: “You are always in the way. You will never amount to anything. You’re not worth my time. You’re lazy. I don't know what I am going to do with you. You’re the devil’s child.” Culture and society say that if we have beauty, we are a step up on others. If we’re not pretty or handsome, we can be brushed aside. Many feel forced to nip and tuck in an attempt to raise self-image. Some base their identity on what they possess.  They have an insatiable need to acquire things.  When they don't feel good about themselves they head for the mall. Of course, we have reflections from our own hand mirrors of expectations, improper thinking, and faulty analysis of the people and events around us (Romans 12:3; Genesis 2:25, and 3:7) Children pick up on all the imperfections around them, and, because of this basic bent toward wrong, they proceed to misinterpret what they take in, and this affects their self-image. For example, “I caused mom’s and dad’s divorce.” "Children are the world's greatest tape recorders, but, they are the world's worst interpreters." Reflections from Satan and his forces (John 8:44; 2 Cor. 4:4; and Rev. 12:10) often lower our image. Satan has three basic roles?  He is the Liar (John 8:44); the Accuser  (Revelation l2:l0); and the one who blinds our minds  (2 Corinthians 4:4). Marvelous reflections come from the God Who created us (Psalm 139:13-16).If we are to become the people that God wants us to be, we must paint in our minds the image that God has in mind when He thinks of us as his finished work. WHAT DOES A POOR SELF-IMAGE LOOK LIKE? People With Poor Self-Images: • don’t trust themselves to make the right decisions; • question their abilities; • worry about what people think of them; •think that if people see them as they really are, they’ll be rejected; •often wear masks in order to hide from self, others and God; •work hard at proving their worth; • have difficulty accepting compliments and criticism; • have trouble separating “no” from rejection; • struggle to let go of a negative past. High Self Esteem opens the door to multiple ministries and places of service. Low self-esteem sabotages Christian service. God envisioned a beautiful dream for his people as they marched out of Egypt. The Promised Land was theirs for the taking; but they crashed and burned. Twelve spies were sent to reconnoiter the land. Joshua and Caleb reported that the land could be won. The remaining ten reported that it couldn’t be taken: “We can’t attack those people; they are stronger than we are.” And they spread among the Israelites a bad report about the land they had explored. They said, “The land we explored devours those living in it. All the people we saw there are of great size. We seemed like grasshoppers in our own eyes, and we looked the same to them (Numbers 13:31-33). Few things stymie us more than thinking that we are grasshoppers. The land was waiting; but, they forgot who they were; and what they were; and whose they were; and they wandered in the desert for forty years. I know people who’ve a wondered in the desert—many for forty years. The reason is low self-esteem. We can't do anything for God, because we see ourselves as grasshoppers. Few things stymie more than thinking so little of ourselves that we never really give God a chance. WHAT DOES A GOOD SELF-IMAGE LOOK LIKE? People With A Good Self-Image: •accept themselves for who they are; •are willing to open themselves and share without fear of criticism or rejection; •believe in their personal abilities to make good decisions; •relate well to people and share other’s burdens while listening to their problems; •have a sense of belonging to others, to a group, or to society; •listen to complaints without going on the defensive; •feel no need to super achieve in order to prove anything to anybody ... “I am what I am.” David said to King Saul: “I don’t need your armor! I have killed lions and bears. I felt the hot breath of the lion on my face. I have God on my side. Goliath said to King Saul: “You send out a young dog to face me! You’ll be bird seed before the day is over!” David replied: “Well, is that so, you uncircumcised Philistine. Your army will be routed by the armies of God before the day is over!” David released the stone in his slingshot. The rock sank into Goliath’s head and down he went. David used Goliath’s own sword to cut off his head! Now that’s a good self-image. HOW MAY WE DEVELOP A GOOD, HEALTHY SELF IMAGE? 1. Develop An Accurate Baseline. Analyze where you are in terms of your idealized self and your current self-image to get a sense of your self-esteem. Remember, the smaller the gap between self-image and idolized self, the higher your self-esteem will be. When analyzing your base-line image, be careful about two things: First, be careful that your idealized self is within the bounds of reality. When I began pastoring my first full-time church I wanted to be the best pastor God ever had. Sometimes, I imagined God saying, “I’m so glad you’re finally here in heaven. We’ve been waiting for you. You’re the best pastor that I ever had.” My goal was to reach the entire city of Tucson for the Lord Jesus Christ. Rather soon, I realize that I couldn’t even reach all the people on my street for Jesus. Second, don’t sell yourself short. If the people around you often criticize you and tell you what a bad person you are, you may discover that it’s hard to imagine a healthy idealized self. Imagine it anyway! It’s one thing to aim too high. It’s a shame to shoot too low. 2. Distinguish Between What’s True And What’s Not. What’s Helpful And What’s Not. Look for the truth. If we receive messages like, “You’re too fat, you’re stupid, you’ll never amount to much,” don’t incorporate those ideas without questioning them. For developing a positive self image you must start questioning those ideas. If they’re not true then reject them. If they are true then work to better those areas. 3. Water The Flowers, Not The Weeds, In Your Garden. I’m tired of telling myself that I’m too fat. I’m tired of thinking that Jesus is disappointed with me because I was not good enough as a pastor. I’m tired of telling myself things like, “I’m so selfish”; or, “many people at church don’t like me.” What do you like most about yourself? What results/achievements are you most proud of What do you do well? Think about those things. 4. Be Nice To Yourself. I look in the mirror every morning and say: “Roger, you are the handsomest man I’ve ever seen.” It is not true, but it feels good. 5. Invest Time With People Who Build You Up And Appreciate You For Who You Are. Limit Your Time With Those Who Put You Down And Constantly Criticize You. 6. Enjoy The Person Of Value That The Lord Jesus Has Made You To Be. God is the correct mirror to reflect to us a proper image and self-concept. If we can buy into the next several verses, our self-image and self-esteem will soar. •God created us just below the angels (Psalm 8:1-5). He created us not just a little higher than the animals.  He made man just a little lower than the angels. •God prescribed us in detail before our birth (Psalm 139:14-16). •God's universal ideal is to develop our internal character to look like Jesus Christ (1 Samuel 16:70); Matthew 5:3-12; and Romans 8:28-29). •"Man looks on the outward appearance, God looks on the heart" (1 Samuel 16:70). •Romans 8:28-29: He has predestined us to be conformed to the likeness of His Son--emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. We may first need to settle some personal issues with God. “You want me to find value and worth from God. Are you kidding me? After all that’s happened to me. I’m not certain that I want to trust God with my life!” Let me answer this by using an illustration of a young girl struggling with her self-image. "If you were standing in front of a mirror and had the power to change anything about the way that you look, would you use that power?" "Yes, there are many things I’d like to change. I am too tall; my nose is too big; my face is really ugly; I have a bad complexion. . ." This girl had an unconscious resentment of God for making her the way He did. A boy that she wanted to date didn't like her and she concluded that it was because she was too tall. Many people think logically; but, to the wrong conclusions about God and the way He operates. 1. God is love. 2. God is the creator. 3. He created me. Conclusion: If what I see in the mirror represents God's creation and love, then He has already messed it up.  I had better do the best I can because I can't trust God. This is all terribly false reasoning of what God is doing in our lives. Don’t miss the fact that there is a higher purpose and calling involved here. God is creating in us a picture that allows us to reflect the image of himself that he wants to project to the world. The differences in unchangeable features are God's special frames to highlight His unique message through us (2 Corinthians 12:9). The picture is the inner qualities that God is developing in us.  The frame is our outward appearance and "defects." The eye is attracted to the picture, not the frame. The frame is to highlight and amplify the picture!  It doesn't outshine the picture. God desires to reveal Himself through His creatures in much the same way that an artist will express his ideals, feelings, and desires in His paintings. The purpose of the picture is that it might be placed in a position of prominence so that hundreds can admire and praise the ideas and abilities of the artist. Let me tell you the story of Lisa Lee. She was brilliant This young girl had a crush on me when I was a children's church pastor at Northway Church.  How did I know?  Her father told me.  Every time she’d see me at church, she’d squeal with delight and threw up her arms for a hug. Sometimes she would see me across a room and wave. Sometimes, she’d call out, "Roger," and people would and look. She was a remarkable girl. Her quick wit and positive outlook were a blessing to many. Looking back I realize that I was too young to appreciate her love. It means more to me now than ever. You see, her picture frame is horribly twisted. She suffers with a degenerating, decimating nerve disease. While her frame is twisted, her picture is gorgeous. 7. Thank God That He Isn't Finished With Us. Like potter and his wheel. Only He knows how He wants to mold the product (Isaiah 45:9-10). Philippians 1:6: "Being confident, He who began a good work will bring it to completion..." Ephesians 2:10: “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” Well, Sarah, I hope I’ve given you somewhat of a complete understanding of how to love your neighbor even better than you love yourself. Love, Roger

Dear Roger, I know this is a loaded question. I don't want to de-value the sacrifice of the men and women who have died for our country, but can a Christian really believe that war is justifiable? Shouldn't Christians be pacifists? I know that Quakers are, but what about the rest of us? Your thoughts? A Curious Pacifist Dear Curious Pacifist, Wars and rumors of wars fill the news, and our country is currently involved in international conflicts. I do not presume to have all the answers. But, since you asked, to the best of my ability, here are some thoughts on an age old question: “If God is both loving and all-powerful, how can He allow war to take place? Either He is not loving, or He is not all powerful, or He is neither”.  While this line of reasoning seems so logical and irrefutable, a little more information from God’s revelation reveals another option.  The answer is in the biblical world-view. God never intended the world to be like this. Rebellion in heaven and rebellion on earth changed everything! Evil is now set free on earth. Satan now holds tremendous sway over the world. The battle against Evil is upon us. The Book of Revelation tells the final story of how God will one day take back the title deed to earth and once again restore it in alignment with His original intentions. Let’s examine a true story parable: Grizzlies are in the woods. Over the years Christians have argued about the proper Biblical way God wants us to handle the bears. The Crusades—kill all the bears! Pacifism—leave the bears alone and hope that love and a non-violent attitude will induce them to go away. Just War—stop and/or neutralize the bears that cause trouble. I Believe That The Just War Is The Only Response That Makes Sense. God’s Ideal Is A World At Peace (Exodus 20:13). Read 1 Chronicles 28:2-3; Psalm 46:9; Isaiah 2:4; Micah 4:3 and consider Jesus' general attitude of love and teaching of non-resistance. God Determined That Some Circumstances Warrant The Just Use Of Force (Exodus 22:2). Read 1 Chronicles 5:20-22; Mark 11:15-17; Luke 19:45-46; Matthew 21:12; John 2:13-16; Matthew 10:34; Luke 12:51; Luke 22:36-38; Luke 3:14; consider God’s attitude toward first century soldiers in Matthew 8:10); Mark 15:39; and Acts 10; and finally, consider how God identifies Himself as the Lord of Hosts (literally, "of armies"). IT IS CLEARLY GOD'S INTENT THAT WE STRIVE FOR PEACE.  YET, SOME CIRCUMSTANCES WARRANT THE USE OF FORCE—BUT UNDER WHAT CONDITIONS? BIBLICAL, JUSTIFIABLE WAR HAS AT LEAST FIVE ESSENTIAL ASPECTS. FIRST, THE PRIMARY PURPOSE IS TO DEFEND THOSE UNDER ATTACK. Proverbs 24:8-12: “Care for those being marched off to slaughter.” SECOND, VENGEANCE IS TEMPERED BY JUSTICE. Romans 13:1a, 4: “But if you do that which is evil, be afraid; for he bears not the sword in vain: for he is the minister of God, a revenger to execute wrath upon him that doeth evil.” Romans 12:19: “Vengeance is mine.” THIRD , There must be a reasonable prospect of VICTORY—OF ACHIEVING the ends for which the war is fought. Luke 14:28-32: “Consider your resources before you go out to fight a war—if you are not in a position to win, negotiate.” On April 19, 1952, General Douglas MacArthur stood before a joint session of Congress to deliver his famous farewell address: "...old soldiers never die, they just fade away." His speech, however, is much more than a farewell. It also includes the following thoughts on war and peace: ". . . It has been said in effect that I was a warmonger. Nothing could be further from the truth. I know war as few other men now living know it, and nothing to me is more revolting. I have long advocated its complete abolition as its very destructiveness on both friend and foe has rendered it useless as a means of settling international disputes. But once war is forced upon us, there is no other alternative than to apply every available means to bring it to a swift end. War's very object is victory, not prolonged indecision. In war there is no substitute for victory." FOURTH, THE MOTIVES MUST BE PURE. James 4:1-3: “Why do you fight? Because you have the wrong motives in your heart.. Hebrews 4:12: “God Judges The Thoughts And Attitudes Of The Heart.” But, our real defense as a nation rests in the spiritual convictions, character, and commitment of our citizenry. Psalm 20:7: "Some trust in chariots, and some in horses: but we will remember the name of the Lord our God." 2 Chronicles 7:14: "If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land." FIFTH, THE POST-WAR ATTITUDE IS ONE OF MERCY. Matthew 5:7: “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.” John Stuart Mill: "War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things.  The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling, which thinks nothing is worth a war, is worse.  A man who has nothing which he cares more about than his own personal safety is a miserable creature, and has no chance of being free unless he is made free and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself." Yes, some things are still worth living and dying for. Bears still roam the wilderness of our world.  May God help us to know when and how to fight them.

Dear Roger, I have been deeply offended because my spouse has been mistreated by a trusted friend and I can't seem to get past it. How do I find it in my heart to drop the offense and honestly forgive them? A Wounded Wife Dear "Wounded Wife." I am so sorry for the pain you are experiencing. It is incredibly hard to watch someone you love get hurt. The closer the relationship is, the more deeply you love someone, the more offended you become and the more wounds penetrate, crippling the relationship you have with the offender. So how do you get past the offense? Roger: Mark Marikos is an eloquent writer on our Preach It, Teach It staff. I want you to read his answer: Have you noticed that it is much harder to forgive offenses against those you love, than those against you?  Bill Gothard explained why in his “Institute in Basic Youth Conflicts” seminar. Gothard said that when I am offended, God gives me the grace to deal with the offense, and if I appropriate that grace, I am able to forgive and move beyond the offense.  However, when someone else is offended, I am not given the grace they are given to deal with the offense.  It is between that person, the offender and God.  It is not “my business”.  Therefore, when I take up an offense for someone else, I am basically on my own! Like one who seizes a dog by the ears is a passer-by who meddles in a quarrel not his own. Proverbs 26:17 (NIV) Like the dog in Proverbs 26:17, some things are easier to take hold of, than to let go.  In “The Horse and His Boy”, one of C.S. Lewis’ “Chronicles of Narnia”, There is a scene where Aravis had been wounded by Aslan as a “stripe-for-stripe” chastisement regarding her mistreatment of a slave girl and the subsequent punishment the girl received.  Feeling remorse, the young Tarkheena asks Aslan if further harm will come to the slave girl because of her own actions.  Alsan responds, “I am telling you your story, not hers.  No one is told any story but their own.” Virtually the same answer is given Shasta, in an earlier scene, when he asks Aslan why He wounded Aravis. But too often, because I forget that God’s grace is sufficient for a loved one, I take up a part in their story, a part I was not meant to play.  Instead of recognizing the sufficiency of God’s grace to heal and avenge, I take it upon myself to be the avenger.  My actions may be limited to mere simmering anger, or I might take a more aggressive role in “repaying” the offense on the loved one’s behalf.  In either case, I am placing myself outside of God’s will.  That is a dangerous place for me, and my anger does nothing to help the loved one heal from the offense, much less to redeem the relationship between the loved one and the offender.  At the same time, I move further from God, and risk falling into bitterness. My bitterness may hinder the loved one’s ability to appropriate God’s grace, forgive and move forward.  It may degrade my relationship with the loved one, as they see me “making too big a deal” about something they are already over. Does that mean it is never appropriate to become angry over someone else’s mistreatment.  I don’t think so – it’s almost an automatic response to seeing a loved one wounded.  But I need to be very careful how I handle my anger; it must first provoke me to prayer, and I must resolve it quickly, not allowing myself to “sleep on it.”  "In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry..." Ephesians 4:26 (NIV) My prayers should include at least the following: ·      Pray comfort for the offended. ·      Pray repentance for the offender. ·      Pray to appropriate the grace to deal with my own sense of hurt at seeing the loved one hurt. The third one is an important step, but an easy one to overlook.  My anger arises because I hurt when someone I love has been hurt.  While I am not given the grace to deal with their hurt, God guarantees me the grace to deal with my own sense of hurt.   No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. 1 Corinthians 10:13 (NIV) Praying those three things acknowledges God’s concern, as well as His ability and desire to restore the offended, the offender, and myself.   It also places me in the proper frame of mind to minister comfort and restoration in the situation rather than just “fanning the flames.”  It clears my head so that I am in a position to be used by God in the situation, rather than being used by the enemy.  And it places me in the “box seats” to watch the drama unfold as God does His glorious work of redemption and restoration.

Dear Roger, Refugees and racism have been, and will continue to be, hot issues. It’s estimated that over 30% of the people in the Roman Empire in the first century were slaves. Slavery and persecution will never go away.  These awful things perpetuate pain around the world.As a Christian, I’m thinking about what we can do to help make things better.I wonder if you might share which Bible teaching, from your perspective, most succinctly instructs us on how to proceed? Thank you, Caitlin   Dear Caitlin, May I please make my answer personal? I consider the Great Commandment to be the most significant and clear-cut Biblical teaching on refugees, racism and slavery. “ . . . One of the Pharisees, an expert in the law, tested him with this question: “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”“Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as you love yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments’” (Matthew 22:34-40). In like manner, I consider the story of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37) to be the best Biblical illustration of how to make the Great Commandment practical. You know the story. I need not reiterate it. However, I’ll share a short overview including a little commentary along the way. Then, at the conclusion, I intend to share an emotional story that will bring a solid answer to the question, “Who is my neighbor?” Jesus takes this great theological controversy and puts it down on a Judean road. He simplifies by telling the story of an injured man–cut and bleeding to death. A certain priest comes along and sees the dying man; but passes by on the other side of the road. We can only speculate as to why he failed to render aid. Maybe he was late for church. Whatever! He had other things to do. The Priest didn’t see an individual. To him the victim was just another beaten man on the dangerous downhill road that led thirty miles from Jerusalem to Jericho. Next, a Levite passes by. Levites were the worship leaders of ancient Israel. Perhaps, it was his turn to sing the solo at synagogue that night. Whatever! We may never know why he failed to help, but we do know that he failed. Thank God a Samaritan came next. Sadly, Jesus listeners wanted anyone else to stop, instead of a Samaritan. Samaritans were despised and rejected by the Jews because they were “half-breeds” (I use the term guardedly). Nebuchadnezzar sacked Israel and exiled the strong and healthy to Babylon. He left the sick and weakly behind. Over the next several generations those left behind intermarried with people in the surrounding nations and the Samaritans were born-- half Jew and half Babylonian. We like to think that we all could get along without prejudice; unfortunately, that does not seem to be the case. We must do all we can to alleviate the pain that we exasperate on people who are “not like us.” My Mother and I took a bus trip to downtown Dallas when I was six. Before we boarded the bus, Mom carefully explained why the “colored people” would be sitting in the back of the bus. What a terrible injustice! I was so young I didn't realize the extent of vicious, cruel racism in the South where i grew up. Deplorable! Rosa Parks sat down in the front of the bus two years earlier. We’ve come a long way since the 1950's, but still have a VERY long way to go. The Pharisees listening to the story were scandalized! The idea that a Samaritan could show more love and concern than a Jew didn’t compute! The Pharisees wanted anyone to stop but a “half-breed” Samaritan. Take a moment to reflect on the penetrating power of a story from the lips of Jesus. He pushes in the dagger and twists it sharply. The Samaritan pulls back the covers and sees a human being. He dismounts his donkey, stops the bleeding, binds up wounds, takes him to an innkeeper, and arranges financing to pay for his medical care, food and lodging while he recovered. There’s the story, now let’s apply it. THIS PARABLE IS A MIRROR OF OUR WORLD TODAY. Ours is a world of murders, violence, racial tension, drug dealing, and war. We live in a divided world. There are good people and bad people and the bad people seem to be the majority. WE ARE ALL FOUND SOMEWHERE IN THIS PARABLE.Maybe you’re the VICTIM. Perhaps you say, “I don’t know why I was born the way I was born? I don’t know why people treat me the way they do. Life is so hard. I just can’t get ahead.” I’m lying on the side of the road. I feel whipped and beaten, stripped, robbed, dead and I can’t help myself. Maybe you’re the ROBBER. The robber saw a victim to exploit. Why is Hollywood turning out so many lurid and violent movies? Why are video games filled with murder, killing, anger and mayhem? Because their creators love us? No! Because they love our money. Why is there Wall Street insider trading? Why do special interest groups rule Congress? Because our nation is filled with robbers. Maybe you’re the PRIEST OR LEVITE. To them, the bleeding victim was a nuisance to avoid. Christianity Today Magazine once wrote an account of a radio station near Princeton Seminary that decided to invite forty-six Seminary students to come to their studio and record a five minute speech on the Good Samaritan. They strategically placed an injured man on the sidewalk leading to the studio. Of the forty-six, forty-four seminarians either stepped over the injured man or crossed to the other side of the street to pass by. There are two kinds of sins, sins of omission and sins of commission. Though we may not be guilty of beating the fellow, we may be guilty of neglecting the fellow. Maybe you’re the LAWYER. The lawyer didn’t see a victim to exploit, or a nuisance to avoid; to him, he was a problem to discuss. The best way to do nothing is to talk about it. The lawyer said, “Let’s talk about neighborliness.” Jesus said, “Let’s talk about one man. Maybe you’re the INNKEEPER. To the innkeeper, this man was a customer to serve. The Samaritan comes in and says, “I have a wounded man here!” “Fine, I’ve not seen a customer all day.” Some people are glad to do anything if you pay them for it. Maybe you’re the SAMARITAN. When you pull back the covers, and instead of seeing a certain man, you see a human being, cut and bleeding to death, it’s hard to pass by. There are so many ways we blind ourselves. She’s Anglo, Arab, Black, Indian, Chinese, Hispanic, and Vietnamese. He's filthy, blue collar, a gang member, a meth addict, a dropout, a drainer. As long as we keep putting people in categories, it’s easy to pass on by! Most of the tragedies in people’s lives are not physical. Most wounds are not spouting blood. However, for those with eyes to see, many people around us are hurting, nonetheless. Our character is not determined by how well we keep a schedule, or how many meetings we attend. Our character is revealed in those sudden choices in life that surprise us. WHO IS MY NEIGHBOR? Jesus turned to the lawyer: “Which of these three was neighbor to the man in need?" The answer is rather easy. Which would you rather go fishing with? Go on a vacation with? Visit you in the hospital? The Samaritan probably couldn’t preach a sermon or sing in the choir. But he knew enough to have a sympathetic heart and to reach out and help a person in need. The real question is not, “Who is my neighbor?” The real question is, “To whom may I be a neighbor?!” BLOOD BANKS  Let me illustrate with a story about the development blood banks. Blood banks were not practical until the 1940's when an African-American surgeon discovered how to produce and store large quantities of artificial blood plasma. The key to sustaining blood banks was born. Banks were set up all over the United States and have saved thousands with blood for those who needed it quickly. He and three associates were on their way to a medical conference in South Carolina when their car swerved to avoid a dog on the highway. Dr. Drew was thrown from the car and critically injured. He was bleeding profusely. Fortunately, his companions were unhurt. They raced to a nearby hospital, but were turned away, because it was an all-white hospital. Before they could reach the “colored” hospital across town, the man who developed artificial blood plasma, and the key to sustaining blood banks, had bled to death. Sincerely, Roger

Dear Roger, For several reasons I’m looking for a new church home. I’m looking for guidelines to help me in my search. If I were to ask you, “What kind of church do you want my church to be,” What would you say? Sincerely, Donelle Dear Donelle, A CHURCH THAT PRIORITIZES BIBLICAL EXPOSITORY TEACHING AND PREACHING The Scriptures are foundational for everything in the church and they must be taught. The first thing written about the early church was that they were devoted to, “the apostles teaching” (Acts 2:42). The teacher’s toolbox includes many different types of sermons and teachings. One-point sermons, three-point sermons and topical sermons are just three of many. But the most effective way to build disciples over time is what’s called “expository” preaching and teaching. “Expository” means to go verse by verse, paragraph by paragraph and chapter by chapter in order to teach, explain and apply the meanings of the Scriptures. I want a church where people arrive asking the question, “Does God have a word to speak to me today?” I listen to a preacher sermonizing about economics and think to myself, “Why is he doing that? There’s not a person in the Treasury Department who doesn’t know ten times more about the economy than he does. I hear a teacher trying to teach on foreign policy, and I think to myself, “There’s not one person in the State Department who doesn’t know ten times more about our foreign policy than he does. God’s servant’s priority is to do what economists and politicians are not trained to do: teach and proclaim the Word of God. Charles Spurgeon used to say, “People are like dogs. If all the teacher-preacher has to share on Sunday morning are a few old scraps, they will fight over the scraps. However, if they are feasting on the Word of God, they will go home from church and take a nap.” Only a church that knows the Bible can ever hope of having a church that pleases Christ! A CHURCH WHERE PRAISING GOD THROUGH SONG AND WORSHIP IS A HIGH PRIORITY “And be not drunken with wine, wherein is riot, but be filled with the Spirit; speaking [ one to another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord” (Ephesians 5:18-19). Singing psalms means taking words and passages directly from the book of Psalms and setting them to music. Spiritual songs are composed, under the leadership of the Holy Spirit, for the purpose of bringing worshipers into the throne room of heaven. These are often songs of personal testimony. “This I Believe” (Creed) by Hillsong Worship is an example of the Apostle’s Creed set in contemporary style. Hymns are designed to teach great biblical truth. For example, look at all the theology taught in the old hymn, “The Old Rugged Cross.” “On a hill far away stood an old rugged crossThe emblem of suffering and shame.And I love that old cross where the dearest and bestFor a world of lost sinners was slain.So I’ll cherish the old rugged crossTill my trophies at last I lay down.And I will cling to the old across crossAnd exchange it someday for crown.To the old rugged Cross I will ever be trueIts shame and reproach gladly bear.Then he’ll call me someday to my home far awayWhere his glory forever I’ll share. Examine the theology packed into twelve short lines! Crucifixion; Salvation; Rewards; Crowns Offered To Jesus; Commitment; Persecution and Heaven. A CHURCH WHICH PRACTICES AND ENCOURAGES PRAYER Charles Spurgeon, a London pastor of a previous generation, whose written sermons circled the globe, who was well known for his evangelistic heart, said: “When I’m invited to speak somewhere, and given the opportunity to either pray a prayer or preach the sermon, I’ll pray the prayer every time.” Most pastors I know, myself included, would rather preach the sermon, than pray the prayer. Prayer develops intimacy with God. Very few times, if any, does the Bible record Paul praying for someone to be healed. However, he prayed often for the human spirit to be matured: “ I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, . . . And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, . . . to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God” (Ephesians 3:16-19). God answers prayer: “Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; You will cry for help, and he will say: ‘Here am I’” (Isaiah 58:9). We had dedicated prayer teams to go at any time when prayer was needed. When people called the church office asking for prayer, we set up appointments for them on Sunday to meet with one of our groups. Sunday evening was often a time for prayer. I recall one woman, Toni, a physician at a local hospital, asked for healing prayer for her upcoming cancer surgery. Not only was she concerned for her life, the extensive surgery meant no children. We followed James’s guideline for healing prayer (James 5:13-16). We anointed her with oil, laid hands on her, and prayed for her healing. Later that evening she told her husband: “Wasn’t that exciting when the lighting crew shined that bright, warm spotlight on me while Roger was praying? Her husband replied, “It was late; there was no light. Are you sure you saw and felt a light? The crew was long gone.” Toni asked her oncologist to run all the tests again. No cancer was found. Several years later she was the proud mother of a daughter and two sons. A CHURCH THAT IS EVANGELISTIC In Luke 5: 4-7, Jesus miraculously filled Peter’s fishing fleet with so many fish that their nets broke. Jesus said, “You think that is exciting! Follow me and I’ll let you fish for men.” The first cry of a newborn babe is to share with others what just happened to them. The day after I became a Christian, I shared the gospel with two of my best friends. A month later all three of us were baptized together! This is important because research shows that 98% of all Christians fail to lead anyone to Christ. Paul tells us that Jesus awards crowns for those who follow him in five different areas. For example, when we first lead a soul to Christ, Jesus reserves for us the soul winner’s crown. Every time we help another become a Christian, he adds a star to our crown. By the way, some seem to believe that numbers is not important. Luke thought that they were. “Those who accepted his message were baptized, and about 3000 were added to their number that day” (Acts 2:41). A CHURCH THAT IS DISCIPLESHIP-FOCUSED. Christians who are farther along in the faith must take those not as far along under their “wings”. This is what Jesus meant when he said to Peter, “Feed my sheep. Tend my little lambs; You then, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus. And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others (2 Timothy 2:1-2). John described three levels of spiritual maturity. We want to mature spiritual children into spiritual mothers and fathers through prayer, fellowship, Bible study and mentoring. I am writing to you, dear children, because your sins have been forgiven on account of his name. I am writing to you, fathers, because you know him who is from the beginning. I am writing to you, young men, because you have overcome the evil one.I write to you, dear children, because you know the Father. I write to you, fathers, because you know him who is from the beginning. I write to you, young men, because you are strong, and the word of God lives in you, and you have overcome the evil one (1 John 2:12-14). “Every man or woman is just a spiritual as he or she wants to be.” Here is one prayer that God promises to answer: “Lord, make me a spiritual mother or father at any price.” A CHURCH WHERE PEOPLE TITHE REGULARLY AND GIVE GENEROUSLY! I’ve heard Christians say that we are no longer under the principle of tithing-- giving the top 10% of our income, (the tithe) to the Lord. They propose that Paul teaches “grace giving” in the New Testament (2 Corinthians 8-9) whereby we personally decide how much to give to the Lord. When we look carefully, two practices are in play. First, we give tithes to the Lord. Second, we give to those in need and to the various facets of Lord’s kingdom. Jesus verified the tithe in Matthew 23:23: “Woe to you teachers and Pharisees. You give your tithes. But, you have neglected the more important matters of justice, mercy and faithfulness. You should have practiced the latter, without neglecting the former.” Paul, on the other hand, is talking about “grace giving”. In this particular case, he is encouraging the Corinthians to give generously to help the Jerusalem church in their time of famine. A CHURCH WHERE FELLOWSHIP PERMEATES THE CONGREGATION. “They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.. . . Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved” (Acts 2:42-47). We really do need each other. Others need us to meet their needs, and we need them to meet our needs. Fellowship involves pouring our lives into the lives of others. Occasionally, we hear Christians say something like, “I don’t need a lot of fellowship, Jesus and I get along just fine.” That attitude reminds me of burning coals in a fire. Imagine taking one particular coal out of the fire and placing it off by itself. It won’t be long until the burning coal is a smoldering ember that soon turns dark and cold. Jesus is not looking for Lone Ranger Christians A CHURCH THAT FOCUSES ON HELPING HURTING PEOPLE. Jesus said to Peter, “I’m a shepherd, you be a shepherd, too” (John 21:15-18). In the catacombs of Rome, the “fish” symbol is often scratched into the walls. The Greek letters for “fish” form an acrostic, “Jesus Christ, son of God, Savior”. However, the most frequently scratched symbol is that of a shepherd’s staff. I decided long ago that if our church focused on helping hurting people we would always have a viable ministry. The world never runs out of hurting people. Our church motto became: “Helping hurting people.” One of our church members sat down in the first teachers meeting of the school year beside a brand-new teacher. The conversation turned to churches. “Where do you go to church?” asked the new teacher. “My family and I go to Casas Church.” “I’ve heard of that church,” responded the new teacher, “That’s the church that helps people.” A CHURCH WHICH IS ACTIVE IN SPIRITUAL WARFARE. James wrote that Satanic attacks can wreak havoc in the lives of Christians “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8). Every area of our lives not surrendered fully to the Holy Spirit is open to attack by a Satanic spirit. John wrote that spiritual young men and women have overcome the devil. Spiritual children are often deceived (1 John 2:12-14). It’s time for many babies to grow up. Paul encourages us to be active in spiritual warfare : “. . . in order that Satan might not outwit us. for we are not unaware of his schemes.” If Satan can deceive Adam and Eve, who were perfect, how must it be for us!? Fortunately, God has given as every tool necessary to be victorious in spiritual warfare. In Ephesians 6:10-18, Paul describes the spiritual armor necessary to find victory. Most all of our demonic attacks can be handled with prayer and discipleship. The key verse is James 4:7: “Submit to God; resist the devil; and he will flee from you.” A CHURCH THAT IS PREPARING FOR THE NEXT GENERATION. Jesus said , “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these” (Matthew 19:14). The best time for people to come to Christ is before the age of 25. After that, most have set their life’s values in place and those values do not include Christianity. Donnelle, I hope that you find my thoughts helpful as you consider your church home. Let me know what you choose and how things work out. Love, Roger

The most frequently asked questions to Ask Roger revolve around the subject of divorce. While marriages fall apart for a wide variety of reasons, the problems surrounding the divorce itself are consistently the same. I have chosen three recent letters and have condensed my personal answers to each questioner. I think that it is helpful for us to get a sense of the horror of the activities that lead to divorce. I chose these three particular letters in order to answer some divorce questions that I have not addressed in previous Ask Rogers . Incidentally, I have intentionally left the grammar and spelling in each letter in order for us to get a better feel for the emotions and pain in the heart and life of the writer. This first letter is from a hurting mother who has filed for divorce and wants to know if she has done the right thing. Dear Roger, One month after i got married to the father of my two youngest children i found out he was having an affair . i forgave him and wanted my married to work, but every day it was something new phones calls, not coming home and then he just didn't want me any more we separated into different houses i offered marriage counseling, church and a host of other things but he wanted nothing. he moved another women into his home and i tried and wanted my marriage to work. after about six months of rejection i filed for divorce as of May 11th our divorce will be finial in mans eyes. my question is in references to Matthew 19: 3-11 can i re-marry? will i commit adultery? will any future marriage be cursed? did i do the right thing? A Hurting Wife Dear Hurting Wife, Yes, you did the right thing. Let me give you several reasons why. The best validation for your divorce is what Paul wrote in Ephesians 5:25-33about the responsibilities of a husband: Your husband doesn’t come close to fulfilling his God-ordained role as a husband. He has broken the marriage vows by chasing after other women. He has rejected you. He has sinned and committed adultery. You have not. According to Paul in 1 Corinthians 7, if he wanted out of the marriage, it is right for you to let him go. Since your divorce is right before God, the Bible says that you may remarry. The Bible has many other guidelines for understanding how to respond when a marriage fails. In addition to Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 19. You can search on Ask Roger for some of my other discussions about the grounds for divorce. I give a more detailed analysis and summation of the guidelines in several other Ask Rogers. Another example bolstering your divorce fillings what God says in Malachi 2:16: "I hate divorce ," says the LORD God of Israel, "and I hate a man's covering himself with violence as well as with his garment," says the LORD Almighty.” The phrase, “and I hate a man's covering himself with violence,” can also be translated, “and I hate a man beating his wife.” Any husband who physically abuses his wife has broken his marriage vows. In summary, N, you can remarry. You will not be committing adultery. Any future marriage will not be cursed. You did the right thing. Remember how Jesus gave a second chance to the woman whose life didn’t turn out so well (John 8:1-12). He helped her to pick up the pieces of her broken life and start over again. There is no doubt in my mind that Jesus can and will help you pick up the pieces and that you can have your best days ahead for you. Love, Roger This next letter deals with an issue that I encounter frequently. One partner or the other has remarried without grounds for divorce. Now he or she becomes a Christian and realizes that he or she had no Biblical grounds for divorce. They wonder if they must divorce their new wife in order to return to the old one. After all, they never should have divorced the first husband or wife in the first place. Dear Roger, R.A. Torrey … taught that if one had already remarried that their was no need to divorce again to make it right. I'm just wondering if it is a pick and choose thing?? I know that God hates divorce....trust me I KNOW!!!! But the problems are what to do now if the divorce was in the past. Sincerely L Dear L, You ask an intriguing question; however, the answer is simple. We are not to divorce a second spouse in order to reconcile and remarry a previous spouse whom we divorced without Biblical grounds. The reason is simple. Two wrongs don’t make it right. God hates divorce. Don’t have another one (Malachi 2:16)! Sincerely, Roger This final letter is from a mother who is in dire straits with two children and an alcohol drinking husband who is beating on her during his drunken stupors. She needs to get as far away from him as she possibly can; unfortunately, like so many women, it sounds like she doesn’t really have the resources to make it financially without him. She has few options and her letter will break your heart. Dear Roger, I'am 23 years old, and i got married when i was 19. i been married 5 years now. i got 2 kids... as of right now my husband is pass out .he was drunk and he came home and pick a fight and when i told him i just want to sleep he punch me and grap my hair ans says i don't care about him just because i didn't want to talk to him...i really don't know what to do.. i love my two daughter so much..i don't want them to be grow up and see that they don't have their parent toghter..Please Pray for me and my daughters...today is sunday i suppose to go to the church,but i can't my eyes can't open cause i been crying all night..Please help me pray for me and my daughter.... Dear M, One thing I can do is to pray for you, your children and your husband. I pray that Jesus can bring peace and wholeness to your entire family. I am so sorry that this is happening to you. Jesus never intended for anyone to suffer like you have suffered at the hands of your own husband. I am going to give you the Bible directive for how a husband ought to behave in a marriage. Paul proclaimed that a husband is to love his wife: He is to lay down his life for his wife just as Jesus sacrificed his life for His church. (Dear Reader, at this point I wrote out Ephesians 5:25-33 for her about a husband loving his wife as Christ loved the Church.) Any husband who fails to love his wife like Jesus—and especially one who hits his wife has literally broken his marriage vows before God. Perhaps, at just the right time, you can share this teaching with you husband. I will pray that when you do, his heart will break and he will forever change his attitude and behaviors against you. Most men who hit their wives begin to do it again and again and again. Most of them, when they sober up, are “O-so-sorry” for what they have done. They often beg and plead for forgiveness and promise that they will never do it again. Don’t trust him. It may be time for you to work out some sort of plan to protect yourself and your daughters from physical harm. Usually, physical abuse increases until the wife really gets hurt. Protect yourself. Jesus Christ can work great miracles in people’s lives and I will pray for your husband to get right with Jesus and have the divine and personal strength to sober up and be the husband and man of God that Jesus designed him to be. Finally, I will pray for your husband to stop hitting you and for you to protect yourself and your children from any abusive behaviors as well. I pray that as his heart and behaviors change, you will have a great future and many good days ahead’ God bless you, Love, Roger A failed marriage is an awful thing. The ripples of pain flow outward in ever widening circles just as a stone tossed into the middle of a quiet pond sends ripples out in all directions. When I talk to high school and college kids on the subject of marriage I ask them to raise their hands if they intend to get married some day. Most all hands go up. Then, I encourage them to look at everyone else in the group; one of every two persons in the room will be divorced at least once. I have never yet married anyone who intended to be in the divorced group—but half of all people tragically end up there any way. So, make having a successful marriage a top priority in your life. You want to be rocking on the front porch some day in retirement with your very best friend—the love of your life. That will be sweet. Love, Roger

Dear Roger, My mother-in-law lost her husband 7 months ago. He lived a long, fulfilling life, and was ready to go at the end. But they were very close, and she has refused to cope with her grief. She even stopped going to church, though she has been a devoted Christian all her life. So how do you help a loved one deal with grief if she refuses to help herself? And how long is too long to be going through such a dark time in the aftermath of a loss?  Sincerely, Daughter-in-Law Dear Daughter-in-Law, Every culture and family deals with grieving differently. Some of us come from families/cultures where sadness was a sign of weakness. You weren’t allowed to be depressed. The expectation was that you would stuff it and move on. Others, screamed and wailed, but there was very little hope in God. Those who are grieving often feel numb, frozen in time. Your mother-in-law may feel she must be self-reliant as the matriarch of the family, that she needs to be strong. In doing so, she isolates herself from those who love her and could help her the most.  HOW DO YOU HELP A LOVED ONE DEAL WITH GRIEF IF SHE REFUSES TO HELP HERSELF? It seems to me that your mother-in-law may be exhibiting signs of severe, clinical depression. She may be experiencing situational depression because of her present circumstances. In addition, she may be a depressive type person and this has been exacerbated by the death of her husband.  I'd recommend she visit a medical doctor have her own health needs evaluated. If she has nursed her husband through a long illness, she is probably physically and emotionally depleted from being the primary caretaker. See also if she needs an antidepressant to help get her back on our feet.   The way to break through the grief façade of someone who is hurting is with months of intensive comforting. When Job sat in utter pain and devastation, his friends sat in silence with him for days before they uttered a word. If you read Job, you know that Job would have been better off if they had kept quiet!  Most people don't know how to comfort others-even those closest to them.  Jesus said: “Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted” (Matthew 5:4). Paul wrote: “Praise be to the God of all comfort who comforts us in all of our troubles, so that we can comfort others with the very same comfort with which you have comforted us.” 2 Corinthians 1:4: Paul wrote: “Rejoice with those who rejoice; and mourn with those who mourn” (Romans 12: 15). Grief is always healed through mourning and comfort. Notice that this requires two people—one to mourn and one to comfort.  Unfortunately, since few Christians know how properly to comfort others, their friends and loved ones continue living in hurt and pain. Sometimes Christian widows/widowers feel others will not understand their doubts or anger toward God. So they isolate themselves.    The proper response to the emotionally hurt and distressed is to listen to them mourn and then to comfort them. Facilitating healing often rests upon things that we say or don’t say in our attempts to help those who are grieving and hurting.  Notice What We Often Say That Jesus Never Said. Blessed Are They Who Mourn:   For they shall be told, “Don’t keep crying. Have faith.”  For they shall receive a sermon. "Heaven is better anyway." For they shall be given reasons why it was time for him to die. For they shall be told how to get past the grief.  For they shall be told, “That is not nearly as bad as what happened to me." For they shall be told, “Stop worrying, you'll be fine.” For they shall be told, “All things work together for good to those who love God.”  Comfort focuses on Emotional, Feeling Words.  For example:   “I know that your heart is aching over your husband’s death, I am so sorry for what you’re experiencing.” “It grieves me deeply that you are in such pain. Life is just not supposed to be this way. I am so sorry.”  “It hurts you deeply that he is gone. Don’t feel like you have to be in a hurry. You have a lot of grieving in front of you. We are here to grieve with you."  “I hurt for you because I love you. I’m so sorry that you’re going through such a hard time.”  Your mother-in-law sounds like what we call an, “rock”. She has been hurt so deeply that the thought of engaging is untenable. So what do we do?  Comfort Tenderizes Rocks.  Every time you, or one in your family, come in contact with her, be certain to say at least one word of comfort. Eventually you’ll begin to break through her defenses and profitable healing can occur. Here is a short appendix from Charles Swindoll giving advice to comforters. You may find it useful. Comforters Care Enough To Come Uninvited. Comforters Listen Carefully So They Can Minister To The Emotions And Not React To The Words. Comforters Openly Express The Depths Of Their Feelings. Comforters Are Not Turned Off By Distasteful Sights. Comforters Understand, So They Say Very Little.  HOW LONG IS TOO LONG TO BE GOING THROUGH SUCH A DARK TIME IN THE AFTERMATH OF A LOSS?  Every grief counselor will tell you that the mourning period is unique to every person. You may not be the person to be frank with her about how long she grieves. It may be your husband, another sibling, a close friend or pastor whom she trusts. However, there are some concrete ways for you to help: Offer practical help. Preparing food, washing clothes, cleaning the house or answering the telephone are just a few of the practical ways of showing you care.  Keep in contact. Call, text or write often. Remain available in the weeks and months to come, as well. Remember that your grieving mom-in-law may reach out to you later than sooner. Be aware of holidays and anniversaries. Your mother-in-law may have a difficult time during special occasions like holidays and anniversaries. These events emphasize the absence of the person who has died. Instead of avoiding those memories, this may be the time to share them. While the above guidelines will be helpful, it is important to recognize that helping her will not be an easy task. You may have to give more concern, time and love that you ever knew you had. But this effort will be more than worth it. By 'walking with' your mother-in-law in grief, you are giving one of life's most precious gifts--yourself. My experience is that most widows are still grieving several years after the loss of a loved one; but most all of them have continued to function well as the days passed by. Well, daughter-in-law, I’ve tried to give you a basic plan for helping your mother-in-law find healing and peace . May I summarize the formula that I use for counseling griefs and hurts:  Mourning + Comforting + (hope, encouragement, rebuke, reasoning, and understanding God’s purposes, etc.) + Time = Healing May God grant you and your family great success in healing the one you love so much. Love, Roger

Dear Roger, I’d like to know more about spiritual warfare. I remember one Sunday night at Casas Church you taught on the subject. I wish that I had taken notes because I learned so much. Please share with me again those teachings on overcoming Satan. Sincerely, Rusty Dear Rusty, SPIRITUAL WARFARE FILLS THE PAGES OF SCRIPTURE. In Matthew 4 and Luke 4 while undergoing intense temptation, Jesus fought Satan in hand to hand combat in the desert and won. In Luke 10 the disciples returned after their first mission rejoicing that “even the spirits submit to us!” Jesus said, “It’s better to rejoice that your names are written in the Book Of Life.” In Luke 13 a crippled woman bound by Satan is healed. In Acts 5 a man tormented by evil spirits is healed. In Acts 8 Philip casts out demonic spirits. In Acts 13 Elymas, the demonic deceiver, is blinded by Peter. In Acts 16 Paul cast demons out of a fortune-telling slave girl. IT’S NAÏVE TO BELIEVE THAT DEMONIC SPIRITS WERE MANIFEST ONLY IN BIBLICAL TIMES. Demonic attacks are easy to spot if you know what to look for. Demonic manifestations are infrequent. Seldom is delivery work necessary. Most satanic work is hidden and undetected. Spiritual warfare is most always a prayer project. IT IS NOT POSSIBLE TO GO ON TO SPIRITUAL MATURITY WITHOUT LEARNING HOW TO “OVERCOME THE EVIL ONE”. Many Christians have no desire whatsoever to face the fact that they may be under attack by the devil. So they seldom take up the “weapons of our warfare” and thus find failure when they least expected it. However, if we want to grow up to spiritual maturity, we will be involved in spiritual warfare. In listing the characteristics of spiritual children, young men and women, and mothers and fathers in First John 2:12-14 , John made it clear that spiritual young men and women have, “overcome the evil one”. They know how to take Satan into battle and win. Spiritual children tend to ignore the symptoms of the attack and are afraid to engage. According to John it is not possible to grow to be a spiritual father or mother without “overcoming the evil one”. Overcoming has to do with no longer being deceived by Satan and his tactics. I remember one of my first encounters with a person tormented by demonic spirits . I was in the midst of counseling a grandmother in her early 60s when she suddenly froze and went into a trance. I watched curiously at her paralyzed race for minute or so until she suddenly said without moving,” They are back aren’t they?” I didn’t know what “they” were, but I agreed with her that they must be back. She then related some of the occultic activity that had hounded her life over the years and now she believed that demonic spirits had communicated that they intended to kill her. “Can you please help?” she asked. This was only my second experience with manifesting demonic spirits and I was a beginner. I knew little about spiritual warfare so I simply prayed for her protection and said, “Goodbye.” Unfortunately, I knew then little about deliverance sessions. The next day one of her daughters called me to say that grandma had slipped in the bathtub, hit her head on the fixture and died. Daughter wanted me to do the funeral. I never told her about meeting with her grandmother the day before. After the funeral I thought much about how little I knew about struggling with an manifesting demonic attack. I’ve only had six or seven manifesting demonic encounters in my 50 years of pastoring. Thankfully, I’ve learned that most demonic problems need no deliverance. Satan can be overcome by prayer and basic discipleship. THE BATTLE OF SPIRITUAL WARFARE IS FOR THE CONTROL OF THE MIND. God wants us to be in control of our minds. God will never take control. Spiritual warfare is all about being in control so that we are free to choose God’s will. Satan’s attack strategies and tactics are designed to take control of our thought life in order to do his dastardly work within us. In Acts 5:3-9 Peter confronted the lies of Ananias and Sapphira by demanding, “Why did you let Satan put it into your minds to lie?” In Mark 8:33 when Peter tried to convince Jesus not to go to the cross, Jesus looked at Peter and said to Satan, “Get behind me Satan.” In 1 Peter Peter counseled, “Prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled….” In 2 Corinthians 10:3-7 Paul reminded us that we have spiritual weapons to demolish demonic strongholds;… And we must take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ. According to the Bible, men and women have three parts to their makeup. The human spirit is where God dwells. The human soul is where we dwell. The soul is our mind, our self, the center of our being. Finally, we have a body with which we interact with the physical world. We meet with God and communion with him Holy Spirit to human spirit. Satan cannot touch our spirit. But he has access to our souls. It is there that the spiritual battle occurs. We all know what it’s like to be tempted by Satan in our minds. This is why the Bible is very careful to encourage us to control our thinking. SATAN’S PRIMARY TOOL IS DECEIT. If perfect, freshly made Eve was deceived, what chance do we have? Fortunately, as we shall see in a moment, as Christians God has given us all the tools we need to overcome Satan. Unfortunately, most of Satan’s work is done quietly and behind the scenes. The word “occult” means “hidden”. According to John, Spiritual Children struggle to see Satan at work. As we mature into spiritual young men and women we have greater ability to uncover Satan’s deceptions. In 2 Corinthians 2:10 Paul warned us “to be alert so that Satan might not “outwit” us. He went on to say, “We are not unaware of his schemes.” Sadly, in most instances, spiritual children have absolutely no idea of his schemes. In Revelation 12:7-9 Jesus told John that in the last days Satan would “lead the whole world astray.” In 2 Corinthians 11:3-4 Paul wrote that he was afraid that just as Eve was deceived, many would be deceived and follow a spirit different from the Holy Spirit. In 1 Timothy 4:1-3 Paul told Timothy that many will be deceived and follow deceiving spirits. In 1 Timothy 4:13-15 Paul warned us that Satan masquerades as an angel of light. In John 8:44 Jesus declared that Satan is the father of all lies. In Job 1-2 we discover that Job never figured out that it was actually Satan who was tormenting him and not God. He was deceived all the way to the end of the book and never figured out what was going on behind the curtain. Paul was not deceived. He understood that his “thorn in the flesh” was a “messenger from Satan” (2 Corinthians 12:7-9). There are three classes of Christians. Class One I call, “Unsurrendered-Deceived”. These people are not Christians and are easily deceived about what’s going on in the spirit realm. Class Two I call, “Surrendered-Deceived”. These folks are Christians, but are still deceived into thinking that everything comes from God. Class Three I call, “Surrendered-Undeceived”. These Christians have no misplaced illusions concerning what’s going on behind the scenes. Satan cannot hide from them. Think about what happened to Adam. He wanted to be like God. Who wouldn’t? But in seeking to become like God he became like Satan. Praying to become a spiritual father at any price is a prayer God wants to answer. Just be certain that it’s God who is answering and not Satan. IT’S POSSIBLE FOR CHRISTIANS TO BE TRAPPED BEHIND ENEMY LINES. It’s naïve for Christians to think that because they are Christians they are immune from satanic attacks. These deceived ones often use the verse, “Greater is he that is in me than he who is in the world” to justify their position. However, just because the Holy Spirit resides within us doesn’t mean that we are free from delete spiritual battle. There are spiritual battles galore occurring all around us; that’s why there are so many verses in the Bible warning us about demonic struggles! In John 17:15 Jesus told the disciples that he was praying for their protection from the Evil One. In Luke 22:31 Jesus told Peter that he was praying for him because Satan had asked “to” sift him like wheat.” In 2 Timothy 2:24-26 Paul warned Christians to beware of the “trap of the Devil”. In 1 Peter 5:8 we are reminded that Satan prowls around like a roaring lion looking for Christians to devour. In 1 Timothy 3:7 Paul warns church elders not to fall into the Devil’s trap. In Ephesians 4:27 Paul encouraged us to remain in control of our minds and not allow Satan to gain a foothold in our lives by committing an ongoing sin. In 1 Corinthians 10:18-22 Paul warned Christians not to eat at the Lord’s table and then go eat at the demon’s table. DON’T STUMBLE BLINDLY THROUGH AN OPEN DOOR TO THE OCCULT WORLD. Just before entering into the Promised Land God declared occultic activities off-limits upon penalty of death. God’s instructions are recorded in Deuteronomy 18:10-12: “Let no one be found among you who sacrifices their son or daughter in the fire, who practices divination or sorcery, interprets omens, engages in witchcraft,or casts spells, or who is a medium or spiritist or who consults the dead.Anyone who does these things is detestable to the Lord….” Let me share with you some of the open doors that I’ve seen Christians stupidly and idiotically walk through during my years of ministry. Praying for spirit guides Attending spiritist meetings Engaging in a perpetual sin so as to give Satan a foothold Risking the danger of an open mind by misusing drugs and alcohol Intentionally transferring spirits from one family member to another Dabbling in occult activities Believing lies Sexual abuse (These folks aren’t stupid; they are victims.) HERE ARE SOME WAYS TO OVERCOME SATAN WHEN THE EVIL ONE ATTACKS. FIRST, LIVE IN THE PRESENT. In John 10:10 Jesus said, “I came that you might have abundant life. Satan comes to steal, kill and destroy.” What do we have that Satan wants to steal, kill and destroy? Abundant life!  Abundant life is always experienced in the present. If Satan can fill our minds full of hurt, bitterness, anger and guilt about the past, then he has destroyed our present and along with it our abundant life. If Satan can fill our minds with worry, fear and anxiety about the future, than he has destroyed our abundant life in the present. SECOND, USE THE JAMES 4:7 GUIDELINE: “SUBMIT TO GOD; RESIST THE DEVIL.” We submit every area of our lives so that we are living under God’s influence and not Satan’s control. We curb our sinning and ask forgiveness for those sins we’ve committed. If we find victory here then we can stop worrying about it. However, if we’re still struggling, it may be that we are under a demonic attack and need to actively engage in spiritual warfare. It is at this point that we “Resist the devil.” On the basis of Jude 9 we follow the example of the Archangel Michael in overcoming Satan. When fighting over the body of Moses, Michael won when he turned to Satan and said, “The Lord rebuke you.” We announce that we have no intention of yielding to Satan in any area and we demand that he leave us alone. In 2 Corinthians 10:3-7 Paul reminds us that our weapons are not worldly ones; they are in fact the power we need to demolish demonic strongholds. In Romans 16:20 Paul encourages us by declaring that the God of Peace will soon crush Satan under their feet. THIRD, THE ARMOR OF GOD ENUNCIATED IN EPHESIANS 6:10-17 WILL QUENCH ANY AND ALL FIERY ARROWS WHICH SATAN MAY SEND AGAINST US. We would never think of leaving the house in the morning naked. In like manner, we have no business leaving the house until we have prayed and put on our spiritual armor. With the Belt Of Truth we declare that we intend for no lies to be accepted into our minds and that everything that we say will be the truth. With the Breastplate Of Righteousness we thank God for the righteousness of Jesus Christ which is imputed to us for our salvation and we declare that everything we do today will be righteous and good. With the Shoes Of The Gospel Of Peace we thank God for our salvation. The war with God regarding our sin is over. We are at peace with God. With the Shield Of Faith we promise to trust God and his Word no matter how awkward, unintelligible or confusing are the situations that we face. Whenever we struggle we will actively find a Bible verse for help. By taking up the Sword Of The Spirit we make it plain that we will trust the teachings of the Bible wherever they may lead. Finally, Paul reminds us that every demonic or spiritual attack calls for a prayer project by which we pray for Satan’s defeat and God’s victory. Rusty, I hope you’ll find the notes helpful. Sincerely, Roger   .

Dear Roger, I don’t really know what a good leader looks like. In my country, I don’t see many great leaders. I need more information or advice about Church Leadership too. I live in a place where we do not have pastors to teach us. What should a good and godly leader be like? Thank you, Theetso Lemogang Dear Theetso,   Let me expand the scope of my answer to include people who are not pastors. The church, as well as society in general, need leaders in many areas.   We can learn a lot about leadership by listening to children. A group of children was asked to define leaders. They were right on target.   Leaders are out front. Their rear end is better seen than their front side. A leader charts a course on a star they have never seen. A leader is one who causes conflict, but who changes things. “You know you’re a leader when you look around and people are following you.”   Some people decide without knowing any of the facts. Some won’t decide until they have all the facts. A few are willing to decide with only some of the facts – only they are leaders. Be careful – some people aren’t worth following.   We can learn a lot about leadership from Kounzes and Posner . They discovered in their research the four things that people consistently want? They want leaders who are: Honest Competent Visionary Inspirational   All four of these are the foundation for Paul’s teaching about leadership in First Timothy 3:1-13 .     The guidelines for a church leader, and the kind of person he, or she, is to be is written down by Paul in 1 Timothy 3:1-13 .   According to Paul, you will notice that the pastor and/or church leaders (or any leader) must live a life of respect and purity, be a good teacher and be the kind of person that people like to follow.    WHAT ARE PEOPLE LOOKING FOR IN THEIR LEADERS?   Kouzes and Posner are well-known for their research on leadership. They discovered that for things appear again and again in their research. What do followers want? They want leaders who are honest, competent, visionary, and inspirational.    Based on what our followers want, we’re able to discern some of the things that good leaders do.   WHAT GOOD LEADERS DO.   1. GOOD LEADERS HAVE A PASSIONATE DESIRE TO KNOW GOD.   The pastor must be in touch with spiritual power: “I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of his sufferings ( Philippians 3:10-12 ).   A Christianity Today Magazine article detailed the results of a large number of church researchers who interviewed 150 pastors. What they found was that these pastors demonstrated a passionate desire to grow a large church; but sadly, not a corresponding desire to know God.”   2. A GOOD LEADER IS IN TOUCH WITH WHERE THE PEOPLE ARE, AND LEADS ACCORDINGLY   “The Good Shepherd knows the sheep and calls each by name.”   Studies have shown what we all know to be true. In the average church 10% of the congregation to most of the work and are considered to be church leaders. 90% are simply attenders. These groups have different needs. Church leaders respond to commitment. Church attenders are more likely to respond to compassion. Very few respond to reason.   Therefore, it’s wise to mix four portions of compassion to each portion of commitment.   3. A GOOD LEADER IS WILLING TO TAKE RISKS.    Culture is changing. Christianity is struggling in our country. We will soon be under religious persecution— and it breaks my heart that we are arguing over music styles and how to alienate gays. Think about the risk Mary took. She did not have to answer “yes” to Gabriel. He gave her a choice. She must’ve thought about all the ridicule, mocking, smearing comments about her out of wedlock child. She considered the risk, and said, “Be it unto me as you said.”   Several years ago I attended conference concerning the handling of church and culture. I will always remember the comment of one woman who said, “I live in the most populous state in America, where the churches still think it is 1950.”   How dare we say, “Come weal or woe, the only status we know is quo.”   God said to Jeremiah, “So you want to be my Prophet? If so, the people will beat you mercilessly, throw you in stocks, toss you in cisterns and never believe a word you say. Do you still want the job?” And Jeremiah took the risk. God said to Hosea, “Go marry a prostitute.” His ministry was finished but his actions demonstrated the loving character of God no. No. God said to Isaiah, “Take off your clothes and walk down the streets of Jerusalem.” Talk about a risk! Isaiah walked naked for the next three years.   4. GOOD LEADERS MODEL THE WAY   “Follow my example as I follow Christ” 1 (Corinthians 11:1).   People are watching us all the time.   I carefully counted my money at the checkout line at the grocery store. I realized that the cashier had given me five dollars too much in change. I said to her, “you gave me five dollars too much.” She said, “I know. I was in your church service yesterday and I was just testing you.”   The first century church Christians were known as, the people who love God and love each other.” Surveys now reveal that 78% of Americans feel that the most judgmental place in America is the local evangelical church.   Jesus said, “They will know you are Christians by your love.”   5. GOOD LEADERS INSPIRE A VISION.    “Without a vision the people perish” ( Proverbs 29:18 ).   Napoleon Bonaparte: “A leader is a dealer in hope.”   George Bernard Shaw: “You see things and you say ‘Why’? But I dream of things that never were, and I say, ‘Why not?’”   6. GOOD LEADERS SET PEOPLE FREE TO ACT.   Thomas Jefferson: “There are two kinds of leaders – Those who trust people and those who fear the people.”   Jefferson’s comments are known today as Theory X and Theory Y. This has a lot to do with structure. Businesses or churches that utilize theory X are organizations who really don’t trust the people. The attitude seems to be, “give them an inch and they will take a mile.” Theory X says that employees must be watched very carefully and micromanaged to be certain that are not slacking off.   Theory Y says, “You can trust the people. You don’t need to look over their shoulders. Stay out of their way and let them do their jobs and you will come out way ahead with your employees.   My dad advised“ Don’t ever push down the people around you to make yourself look better. Instead, lavish great praise on the people around you and they will lift you up on their shoulders.”   7. GOOD LEADERS ENCOURAGE THE HEART   Who wants to be around an old sourpuss?   Alexander Maclaren: “Be kind to everyone you meet, because everyone’s fighting a battle.”   If someone comes to church with a broken arm, it’s easy to spot. You may go encourage and comfort them. However, many people come in with broken hearts and no one notices. There are people I know to whom I can whisper one word and bring tears to their eyes.   Watch out for broken people. When you see someone in pain, Jesus said to comfort them. Many years ago I decided that I would try to say a word of encouragement to at least three people a day. It’s amazing how even strangers will smile when you take a moment to say a word of encouragement.   One day a staff member said, “Roger, do you know what you do best?” “No.” “What you do best is encourage us.”   8.GOOD LEADERS KNOW WHO IS THE REAL ENEMY.   Ephesians 6:10-12   Early in my ministry, at the Moody Pastors’ Conference meeting in Chicago, Warren Wiersbe asked the question to a room full of 1, 500 pastors: “Do you know much about sheep?” Not many hands were raised.   Let me tell you some things about sheep. First, sheep stink. Second, sheep need to be led not driven. Third, sheep are not the enemy. I’m convinced that that is the best sermon on shepherding I have ever heard.   9. GOOD LEADERS DEVELOP A “CATALYTIC” LEADERSHIP STYLE.   People often ask, “which is more important?” The needs of the people, or the needs of the. Organization. Most people answer, “the needs of the people.” This is what I call the empathetic ENCOURAGER Style Of Leadership. Barnabas mentored John Mark who had so disappointed Paul. At the end of his life Paul asked for Mark to come and visit him in prison because, said Paul, “Mark is a profitable man for the ministry.” Encourager’s are people centered, production secondary, and promote love and unity.   David employed what I call the COMMANDER “efficient” style of leadership. This leader is more concerned about building a strong organization than about the people who are part of it. Commanders, usually have narrow agendas, are rigid and efficient, create conflicts and pressure, and leave a trail of broken and bleeding people in their wake. David built a great empire and ruined his family. You would not have wanted to be one of David’s children.   The CATALYST is often called the effective style. Nehemiah is the best biblical example of a catalyst. Catalysts balanced the walls and the people. They work for the long range and realize that building a strong organization is one of the most important ways to care for the people. The catalyst gets things done with the balanced combination of both walls and people.   King Saul is the HERMIT who is uncomfortable with both people and goals. The hermit withdraws from people and abandons organizational initiatives. Sometimes, especially during great stress, it is okay to be a hermit in order to re-group and strengthen for the battles ahead.   10. GOOD LEADERS UNDERSTAND THE DISTINCTION BETWEEN MANAGEMENT AND LEADERSHIP. Management is getting other people to do something. Leadership is getting other people to want to do it.    Well, Theetso, I hope that some of these thoughts are helpful to you and that God will develop you into a great leader.   Love, Roger